Pranks!

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Ever play pranks on your coworkers? I'm going to bed now, but I plan to post some stories. In the meantime, let's hear some funny stories!

[Erin]

Not really a prank, but a birthday gift we gave our store manager once for her birthday. (this was when I worked at McD's) One of the assistant managers knew a cake decorator at the grocery store down the street. She got him to make a special cake for the SM... We had to hide the cake from customers when it was brought into the store, and we had to keep it in the breakroom.

The cake resembled a clowns face, the nose was made out of a Twinkie...and the nose had been frosted and shaped like a certain piece of male anatomy.

I'm sure the customers out in the lobby were wondering why the employees were all in the breakroom telling the SM to "eat it!" She took a big bite of the Twinkie and ended up with pink frosting (from the clown face) on her nose.

****
Same manager as above...she was blonde, and I used to make blonde jokes all the time when she would get forgetful about things when we were opening. Not really a prank, and she took the jokes well. Once I got a dollar bill in the drive-thru from a customer. Someone had written on one side "How do you keep a blonde busy? Over for answer"....and on the other side, it said "How do you keep a blonde busy? Over for answer". I showed it to her when she came back to get change out of my drawer for front line. She looked at it, read one side...turned it over, read that, and turned it over again... then gave me her "evil" glare and said "oh yoooou!!!"...she walked away giggling.

****
again, same manager as above...her husband used to be the head manager at that store, till he left for a higher paying job with a refrigeration company. We used to talk about how some of the customers seemed to be brain damaged or something. One day, I'm out shopping, and I find a t-shirt that says "drain bamaged" on it. So I bought it for him for Christmas. He'd wear it on days when he was scheduled to help unload the truck orders. Thought it was funny when he'd come up to help us on the front counter wearing that t-shirt.

I actually miss that job...hated McDonald's, but the management were probably the best bosses I've ever had at any job. Saw the old store manager a couple of years ago. She was working in a Gordman's. Turns out she had just been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and was about to quit her job. I miss working for her. She was cool. I hope she's doing ok.

[Ree]

When I worked in the deli at the grocery store, I hired a "Peel-o-gram" for my boss on his birthday.

He thought he was being interviewed by the newspaper about retailing and the butcher business in a small town.
The girl was really smart, and really knew her stuff. (I think she told me she was a journalism major and helped pay her way through school doing the peel-o-grams.)
She was wearing a really smart suit, glasses, and had her hair pinned up on her head. She had a tape recorder and notebook, and was asking some really good questions. She had done her homework.
All of a sudden in the interview, she pressed a button on the tape recorder, and the stripper music started, and off came the glasses, down came the hair and off came the jacket.

She only went as far as a really pretty camisole/undie combo - as it was not a strip-o-gram, but it was enough to embarrass the heck out of him.
Pretty much everybody but him knew about the joke, so they were all crowded around trying to see in the window to the butcher shop.

He was a while forgiving me for that one.

[tonydanza]

One day I answered the phone when some bitch says "I was in your store last week and I was NOT satisfied with your service, let me speak to a manager." I transferred her, but later found out it was the assistant manager of the store playing a prank.

[TYFSOK]

Our inventory manager at B&N was Steve, a really great guy. He kept us in stock with Harry Potter 4, and I'm not sure how he did it. We never were out of stock, even when all the other B&Ns in town were.

Unfortunately, the other stores complained to corporate, and Steve got a dressing-down over it. (For doing his job WELL, and apparently BETTER than his counterparts at other stores!) So, he decided to move on, to a better job.

Anyway, Steve was a military history buff, to the extent of being a Civil War re-enactor. So, we decided that when we got him a cake, it would be no ordinary cake.

We got a standard decorated cake from the grocery store in the mall. It was a dirtbiking decoration scheme, with dirt road, small plastic trees, and a jump over a river. We took off the bike, and bought a pack of plastic soldiers and some red jelly-type frosting. After washing the soldiers thoroughly, we set up an ambush on the road. We even took out the shears and removed some limbs and a head...

Steve loved it.

[Mr. Rager!]

Hmm....

One day my coworker Scott and I were extremely bored, and Scott was doing impersonations of everyone. He impersonated our store manager quite well. So he goes, "who won't answer their phone?" I tell him, "Travis" So Scott was getting ready to call Travis and pretend to be our store manager, but I had this funny feeling Scott would start laughing, so I told Scott to record it on his cell phone, then call Travis and play it back.

So I told Scott to say something along the lines that Travis is fired. So Scott says, "Hello, Travis. This is *store manager* from *where I work*. Can you come in for meeting? Because you are fired and you no longer have career at *where I work*." She has a really think Spanish accent, and Scott pulled it off perfectly.

Now, we have this stupid trophy that departments can earn each week. It's a traveling trophy. I stole it from our ops manager, and I've been moving it around the Home Improvement department, putting it in weird places.

My next prank is going to involve our floor model safe that isn't supposed to lock, but does. I have to call Monday and get the default code from it to open it, but I'm going to put something in that makes noise at certain times of the day. I'm thinking of an alarm clock. And I'll be the only one with the code... well, until someone gets smart and gets the code for it too.

Sometimes I call our parts line, (which at the beginning is computer) and then I transfer it to another department.

Another fun thing is to page someone to their department when they are standing right next to you. The funniest thing is when they page "Please repeat last page" after you do it.

The snowthrowers are back on the floor!! It'll be a matter of time until I fling pennies off the auger lever at my coworkers.

I've done more.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

It is cool to have management with a sense of humor!

Okay. I'll probably make a couple posts here as I think about them.

This one was at public television. We use a lot of duct tape and electrical tape in that job to dress cables down so people don't trip on them. End of the day, we might have several baseball size wads of duct tape.

These are wonderful to spike into your co-worker's back as they are walking down the hall. The hallways became hunting grounds of the paranoid tape-less and the hunters with tape balls in their hands. A good tape ball was a hot commodity. In fact, one got made that was roughly the size of a 5 year old and crammed into my locker so tight I had to go down to the shop and get a crowbar to get the thing out.

We were getting ready to do a show in the "big" studio. We had some down time beforehand, so I turned out the lights in the studio, closed the door, and climbed up into a really tall lighting ladder with a tape ball. And waited in the pitch dark for 20 minutes or more.

X was the youngest member of the crew, and everyone's favorite target. Kid had a wicked arm and was fast and hard to hit. Eventually, he came into the studio, turned on the lights, and started puttering around with his camera, thinking he was completely alone.

Nailed him right between the shoulder blades, scaring the living hell out of him.

So now, he's on a vendetta, right? He goes nowhere without tape in his hand. He's got a contract out on me. End of the day, he sees me headed toward the exit, and he decides to make his move. I run like hell, him in hot pursuit. I duck around a corner, run toward the loading dock, and shove the doors open. But instead of going out the loading door, I duck into the break room right next to the door.

X sees the doors closing in front of thim. He runs out onto the dock, looks around for me and I emerge from the break room behind him and nail him right between the shoulder blades, scaring the living hell out of him.

He might have had speed and youth on his side, but I had old age and treachery and that wins every time.

[Jpurple]

Heh. Once upon a time when I worked with my husband in a computer store, we decided to do something evil for Christmas. The store was owned by another husband and wife team, and the wife was really into Beanie Babies. She collected them and was somewhat anal about keeping the tages perfect, etc. So we bought a Beanie Baby (a special one, I don't remember what) and ran it through the shredder a few times, then wrapped it up in lovely Christmas wrapping. The look on her face when she opened it was priceless!

[K245five]

Fun With Ketchup Packets

One time at my old store I was really bored so I took some leftover ketchup packets and placed them under the nubs of the toilet seat in the unisex employee restroom in the back.

Well, this one co-worker, "M", went in shortly after and sat down to use the toilet. In her own words which she told me a couple of days later, this is what happened next:

"I just sat down on the seat to use the toilet, and I hear 'POP!' 'POP!' I'm wondering 'What the heck was that!?' I stand up and I see red all through the water as well as smeared on the bowl on some places. I also noticed that my underwear, butt, and legs have red on them. At this point I'm thinking 'Where's all this blood coming from!?' I lift up the seat and then I see the smashed ketchup packets. At first I'm relieved that I didn't rupture something internally, then I went about wiping myself off."

I confessed a couple of days later that it was me. Luckily, she was a good sport about it and kidded me about it afterwords. Everytime she saw me, she would glare at me and say "Ketchup!", then laugh.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

brilliant! ketchup!

[MystyGlyttyr]

One of the editors always complains when she comes back from lunch and there are messages taped to her computer (good natured complaining, that's what we're supposed to do). So, one day, I took my lunch at the same time as her, and spent an hour just making up obviously fake messages and taping them to her computer. "Seymour Butts", "Peppi Roni", "Andre the Giant", etc., with every phone number being Diesel Driving Academy, heh heh. By the time I was done, I had used up an entire message pad and her computer looked like it was covered in pink papery feathers.

The look on her face when she came back in was priceless When she started peeling off the messages and looking at the names...the first one she peeled off was Lance Armstrong...she proceeded to ball them up and launch them at me one-by-one. Oh well, I can take it...

[MadMike]

The assistant manager at the supermarket was something of a smartass and a prankster, and he got me good one day...

It was my 19th birthday, which fell on a Saturday, so I was working a full day, complete with a lunch break. Somehow, he found out it was my birthday, so he decided to give me a "present."

I was just coming back from my lunch, when he asked me to help him with something in the back room. All the other guys were following us back, but for some reason, I didn't think anything of it, until he and all the other guys mooned me. I might have liked it better if he would have gotten some of the women involved.

I did get him back, although it was unintentional. I went into the back room to put away my coat and grab my apron, when he paged the breakroom from the office, asking if I was back there. I just happened to be standing in the doorway, right below the speaker, and jokingly said, "Yeah! What do you want, dickhead?"

And then there was silence. After waiting for a response for about 15 seconds, I just shrugged it off and went to the clock to punch in. Next thing I know, he comes charging thru the double doors like a freight train, stands there all out of breath, and finally tells me, "That echoed all over the front of the store!" Oops...

[wagegoth]

Long

Way, way back, I worked as an aide at a 1st and 2nd grade elementary school.

First, I was in the Special Education class (very difficult, most of the children were emotionally damaged, the physically handicapped children were the easiest part of the job), and you really need to blow off some steam when you can.

Then, I was assigned to assist the district psychologist (again having to deal with children who were being emotionally fragged by their "parents") and helping the school secretary. Almost as much need to blow off steam.

So here's a few: the school janitor (very funny and cool) got hold of my packet of pictures. I spent the next several weeks locating where he had stuck them up around the school. The wallet-sized were the hardest. That was mild.

A small war was waging between a teacher in the Learning Disabled class and me. It had escalated gradually. One day he came into the break room and gave me a box of See's chocolates and an apology. Cool! I opened the box and laughed so hard everyone turned to find out what had happened. He and his wife had taken a bite out of or stuck their fingers into every single piece of candy in the box. They had very carefully resealed the plastic on the box before giving it to me.

I got him back by buying a box of the same candy, then carefully opening the plastic seal on one corner by just a bit. I gave it to him, he noticed the open plastic, and refused to open it. Note: I had not opened the box, it was just an excellent way to mess with his head.

Another teacher and I also had an escalating war going. The last I remember, he took about twenty wooden nickels (when the kids paid for their milk, the teachers would give them wooden nickels to turn in at the cafeteria), wrapped a rubber band around the stack, then threw it perfectly across the room, right into my lap, where the rubber band popped off and left me with a lapful of wooden nickels that then scattered onto the floor when I tried to get up. Again, I nearly fell over laughing, as I was busy and had not even noticed him enter the office. It was a beautiful throw.

I was not as innovative in response. After he left one evening, I took all the spare wooden nickels and taped them to his chair. I then took an entire ball of string and wound it all around his desk, including wrapping it individually around books, his stapler, pencil holder, etc. on his desk, then opened the drawers and wound it around the drawers before closing them, and then pulled his chair into the desk and wrapped it in tightly.

He came into the office the next day to salute me. He had to take his scissors to get into his desk, then pull all the wooden nickels off before he could sit down.

I wish I could pull that kind of thing now. Now, I just get to be bitter and abrasively witty. Yes, really I am, it just never seems to show up in my posts.

[Ringtail Z28]

One of the pranks we used to pull in the backroom at Target was to take one of these really big rubberbands that went around merchandise when it was on a pallet and put it around the door handles of both the mens and womens employee restrooms, trapping whoever was in the restroom inside. It got old after a while though.

A good one was pulled on an assistant manager who was using the women's employee restroom instead of the men's, because of plumbing problems. One of the backroom employees started beating on the door and doing a really good impression of an older asian employee, yelling things like "please hurry I have to go really bad!" and crying. He rushed off just before the manager came out. He was asking me and the other employees where she ran off to. We told him she went on herself and ran off crying, he starts running around the store trying to find her. He later calls the house of the employee he thinks he made pee on herself only to find that she had been on vacation the whole time.

[Cvstos]

Not from work, but a great one nonetheless.

One of my friends had a senior class prank that was truly impressive. They released two pigs into their school, and painted numbers on their backs. One of the pigs had a "1", and the other pig had a "3". The teachers spent a significant amount of time searching for the mythical pig #2.