It's trivial but I feel awkward

[Food Lady]

My style is late '20s/early '30s-inspired but I don't wear hats because honestly, they are uncomfortable to me. Plus, grabbing one is an extra step when I'm always in a hurry to get out the door. I don't even wear gloves when I should. Accessories are just not my thing.
My friend who has known me for years inexplicably got me a hat for Christmas. She found it on Facebook marketplace and put in a bit of effort to get it, as she says it's perfect for me. (Has she not paid attention for the last 10+ years? I wore hats for like a month in 2014 and that's it.) I tried it on when she gave it to me and it sat too high on my head because of my huge hair bun--I have an unbelievable amount of hair and it's a yard long--and because it just doesn't really fit my head anyway. I kept trying to pull it down because if I am going to wear one it should fit almost over the brow, as was the style. Our other friend kept saying it wasn't working and I felt frustrated because I was trying to make it work for the sake of the gifter. I said maybe I could try to stretch it or something, knowing full well that will never happen because I have two jobs. I don't even have time to wash my hair, eat, or do laundry half the time. I don't have time to mess with a hat.
Well, I put it in my trunk because I was away from home when she gave it to me and then forgot about it. A week or two later I saw her husband and he asked "Where's the hat?" with a big smile and I was confused. Hadn't thought about it at all. I just kind of rattled off an answer that it didn't fit. I don't know if he said anything to her but when I don't wear it I know she'll notice and I don't want to get hurt. I don't know how to handle this. Time and time again friends have given me gifts that I can't use and I wonder how they don't seem to know me at all.

[Pixelated]

Ugh. Clothing gifts that don't suit the recipient. My sympathies; my mother had a bit of a tendency to do the same thing. My solution was to wear the item when I visited her. Over time, after maybe half a dozen visits, I could quietly donate it somewhere and she never remarked on its disappearance.

One possible response to "Where's the hat?" is "I'm saving it for a special occasion!", said with a big smile. If ever you go out with said friend, that could be the 'special occasion', even if you have to Krazy Glue the hat to your head to get it to stay on. (I am VERY jealous of your description of your hair, by the way ....)

Eventually, hopefully, she and/or her hubby will stop commenting on the hat (or its absence). FWIW, he had no right to ask such a thing anyway. Once something is gifted to somebody, it becomes theirs to do with as they will, and the giver loses all claim to it ... including the right to ask where it is or why you're not wearing/using it.

Hope this helps.

[Food Lady]

It does help. Maybe they won't make a big deal of it. I wish I'd answered better but I was caught off guard. Yes, thick hair can be a blessing but it also, um, gets in trouble. I washed it today and wore it to work down so it could dry. It kept getting caught in things. I normally always wear it in a bun. I know there are hats that accommodate that but I don't bother looking for them.