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I suppose it's a sign of the times, and it had to happen sooner or later. I work at a colonial inn in a small New England town. Which, obviously, is bound to be targeted by terrorists. 
Anyway, this past Friday afternoon one of our guests alerted security to the fact that terrorists are using the inn's loading dock as a staging point for an attack.
According to their report, which is being passed around for folks to read today, she saw an "evil Iraqi terrorist stealing bags of supplies from the loading dock at approx. 3:30 PM on Friday. The terrorist spoke to, but was not stopped by, several employees who obviously need to be better trained to protect our guests from evil Iraqi terrorist plots."
When asked how she knew it was a terrorist: "Because he was a dark skinned man wearing jeans and black t-shirt with a mystic Muslim sign on it in red."
Yeah, just let that sink in for a minute.
So, all that being said, security is sure that she's a crackpot. And we're hoping she's a guest of the facility in town that treats a number of mental illnesses on an outpatient basis.
That's the end of the security report.
But I actually have something to add to this. I can identify the man this guest saw, and I can assure you that he is evil incarnate.
I know this because I left early on Friday and I was at the loading dock when this took place.
Since I was leaving early, I kindly offered to take some blankets for repair, as the woman who repairs them lives only a mile from my house. I'm part Native American, so I'm a bit darker in color than the white folks. I changed into my street clothes (black t-shirt & jeans) before I left. And I did back my car up to the loading dock so I could throw the bags of blankets into my trunk. I even spoke to some of my co-workers who were a bit jealous of my early departure, though not the point of tackling me and calling Homeland security.
The best part, though, has to be the 'evil Muslim sign' on my shirt. I was wearing a black t-shirt with the Autobot insignia in red across the front. It turns out that all this time, my childhood hero Optimus Prime (and the rest of the Autobots
) were evil Iraqi terrorists...and now so am I! 
Anyway, this past Friday afternoon one of our guests alerted security to the fact that terrorists are using the inn's loading dock as a staging point for an attack.
According to their report, which is being passed around for folks to read today, she saw an "evil Iraqi terrorist stealing bags of supplies from the loading dock at approx. 3:30 PM on Friday. The terrorist spoke to, but was not stopped by, several employees who obviously need to be better trained to protect our guests from evil Iraqi terrorist plots."
When asked how she knew it was a terrorist: "Because he was a dark skinned man wearing jeans and black t-shirt with a mystic Muslim sign on it in red."
Yeah, just let that sink in for a minute.
So, all that being said, security is sure that she's a crackpot. And we're hoping she's a guest of the facility in town that treats a number of mental illnesses on an outpatient basis.
That's the end of the security report.
But I actually have something to add to this. I can identify the man this guest saw, and I can assure you that he is evil incarnate.
I know this because I left early on Friday and I was at the loading dock when this took place.
Since I was leaving early, I kindly offered to take some blankets for repair, as the woman who repairs them lives only a mile from my house. I'm part Native American, so I'm a bit darker in color than the white folks. I changed into my street clothes (black t-shirt & jeans) before I left. And I did back my car up to the loading dock so I could throw the bags of blankets into my trunk. I even spoke to some of my co-workers who were a bit jealous of my early departure, though not the point of tackling me and calling Homeland security.
The best part, though, has to be the 'evil Muslim sign' on my shirt. I was wearing a black t-shirt with the Autobot insignia in red across the front. It turns out that all this time, my childhood hero Optimus Prime (and the rest of the Autobots
) were evil Iraqi terrorists...and now so am I!
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