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Overall this has generally been the weekend from the Twilight Zone.
Today I come into work at 5 am, along with:
At about 5 minutes after 5, the doorbell rings, right after Key Carrier locked the front door and turned the store alarms back on. So he has to head back up front after getting the backroom to let in the 6th member of our cast:
With everybody in the store, we go about our business until about 5:45, when I get paged by Planogram Lady.
"Irv, meet me over by the the back stairway to the offices. I'll explain later."
This is an odd request. I get over there and meet Planogram Lady, Key Carrier, Trainer and Trainee.
Trainer tells us the following:
We split up. Trainer and Key Carrier go to the front stairway and Planogram Lady and myself go to the back. We move slowly and inspect every nook and cranny upstairs. We look for Drunken Fucktard in the bike/records storage room. We look for him in the computer room. (First time I've ever been in there!) We look for him in the old training room that is now used as a conference room. We look for him in the store manager's office, and also in the closet in the office.
Then we hear a ruckus. Turns out Trainer found Drunken Fucktard and is now reading him the riot act.
"What you doin' up here? Why you run away when I try to talk to you?"
"Blurg Geblarrrgghhhhhhh....."Drunken Fucktard tries to throw a punch in Trainer's general direction, but he hits only air molecules and we gang up on him.
"You not s'posed to be here today! You a low-down, dirty thief! You hit de do an you doan come back!"
(drunken gibberish)
We escort Drunken Fucktard down the stairs and to the front door, where we wait for Key Carrier to turn off the store alarms. Trainer continues to berate Drunken Fucktard:
"What you doin' here if you ain't cleanin? Why you run away from me? Answer that question! You hit de do and you doan come back or I call the cops on you. They're lookin' for you. I tell them I got a thief in my store."
The alarms are turned off, Drunken Fucktard leaves with no further comment, and we try to figure out the best way to let all the managers and key carriers know that Drunken Fucktard is not to be let into the store if he ever shows up again.
So in summation: We cannot fire this maintenance company soon enough and get a different one in. Even though Trainer and Trainee seem to be competent, hard-working people.
Today I come into work at 5 am, along with:
- Key carrier--older man in his early 60s who'll retire at the end of this month and as a result I may end up with his key (50 cents more an hour, woo hoo)
- Planogram lady--planogram supervisor who has to bang out a few planograms before the day is over
- Trainee--not for the store, but the cleaning company. Younger man, in his early 20s I'd estimate. Might be the new cleaning person for the store
- Trainer--black guy with a big Southern accent. At least I think he is a trainer or manager-type, because he doesn't really do any work but shows Trainee the routine and how to operate power equipment like floor scrubber, burnisher, etc.
At about 5 minutes after 5, the doorbell rings, right after Key Carrier locked the front door and turned the store alarms back on. So he has to head back up front after getting the backroom to let in the 6th member of our cast:
- Drunken Fucktard--Short Russian guy who's worked at our store a couple times in the past, but never for too long. My guess is he's a fill-in person or something. He's clad in a t-shirt, shorts and sandals, which really isn't appropriate attire for the job, what with all the chemicals and power equipment involved and all
With everybody in the store, we go about our business until about 5:45, when I get paged by Planogram Lady.
"Irv, meet me over by the the back stairway to the offices. I'll explain later."
This is an odd request. I get over there and meet Planogram Lady, Key Carrier, Trainer and Trainee. Trainer tells us the following:
- Drunken Fucktard is not supposed to be in the store today.
- Whenever Trainer sees Drunken Fucktard around and goes to ask him to do something, if he's even doing anything, or what's he doing in the store today, he runs upstairs and hides.
- Drunken Fucktard is so named because he always comes into work drunk and has a bottle with some kind of potent potable hidden so he can sneak off for more drinks.
- Drunken Fucktard evidently is also a thief who has a warrant issued for his arrest from some other city, for retail theft that occurred while he was working in one of our stores there.
- Therefore, Trainer wants him out of the store because he and/or Trainee stand to be held responsible if anything goes missing from our store. However, he wants our backup in case Drunken Fucktard decides to put up a fight.
- This would not be the first time Trainer has had to toss Drunken Fucktard out of a store. He has done it a couple times before.
We split up. Trainer and Key Carrier go to the front stairway and Planogram Lady and myself go to the back. We move slowly and inspect every nook and cranny upstairs. We look for Drunken Fucktard in the bike/records storage room. We look for him in the computer room. (First time I've ever been in there!) We look for him in the old training room that is now used as a conference room. We look for him in the store manager's office, and also in the closet in the office.
Then we hear a ruckus. Turns out Trainer found Drunken Fucktard and is now reading him the riot act.
"What you doin' up here? Why you run away when I try to talk to you?"
"Blurg Geblarrrgghhhhhhh....."Drunken Fucktard tries to throw a punch in Trainer's general direction, but he hits only air molecules and we gang up on him.
"You not s'posed to be here today! You a low-down, dirty thief! You hit de do an you doan come back!"
(drunken gibberish)
We escort Drunken Fucktard down the stairs and to the front door, where we wait for Key Carrier to turn off the store alarms. Trainer continues to berate Drunken Fucktard:
"What you doin' here if you ain't cleanin? Why you run away from me? Answer that question! You hit de do and you doan come back or I call the cops on you. They're lookin' for you. I tell them I got a thief in my store."
The alarms are turned off, Drunken Fucktard leaves with no further comment, and we try to figure out the best way to let all the managers and key carriers know that Drunken Fucktard is not to be let into the store if he ever shows up again.
So in summation: We cannot fire this maintenance company soon enough and get a different one in. Even though Trainer and Trainee seem to be competent, hard-working people.
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