This just in! Men create more housework for their wives/women!

[CaroPhoenix]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/...seworkforwomen

They create 7 hours more housework for the women in their lives. And how is this newsworthy? Did the women on earth really need this bit of depressing news?

[PuckishOne]

And in other news, water is wet.

Seriously, though, I'm a little dubious about this. It looks like all the data was from self-reporting rather than from observation. So who's going to fess up that they spend their free time watching "Dr. Phil" instead of alphabetizing the spice rack? I know there are plenty of lazy slobs of both genders out there, though, so maybe this will get people talking and trying to even things out in their own homes. (Well, I can hope, can't it?!)

[Boozy]

I like the line, "For men, tying the knot saves an hour of weekly chores."

One evening a few months after we got married, I mentioned to my husband that I was tired from cleaning the house that day. He said, "Why? It only took me an hour to clean the place before you moved in."

"Cleaning" to my husband means spraying some Lysol around, taking out the trash, and sweeping the large pieces of food off the floor.

Its not so much that I save him an hour a week as I am saving him from himself.

[Bagga]

But on the other hand, I offset my added seven hours by saying things to my wife like "FFS, you dont have to dust the skirting board every day, no one ever visits, and no one ever checks."

We started doing some really disgusting things as the years went by....

Such as:

Using the same cups for 2 consecutive but separately brewed pots of tea WITHOUT WASHING THE CUPS UP IN BETWEEN! (yuck, how could we?)
Eating our lunch snack sandwiches followed by our cakies OFF THE SAME PLATE! (men, they are such pigs!)
Leaving a single glass on the draining board for both of us to get drinks of water should we need them. (Both of us from the same glass! All day! Call the OSHA! However, after a few years we had started kissing. With tongues! Eeeuww, call the OSHA! Again!)

After watching my mum slaving herself tired doing housework, and my auntie POLISHING her copper plumbing pipes every flaming day, I decided housework was a con, or an OCD reaction to being bored senseless by the environment.

Housework grows to fill the time you are willing to allot to it - don't be a good little wife, get yourself a good little life.

[rvdammit]

And how much of that is "Adding an extra person creates more stuff" for the person spending more time at home?

Think about it you've doubled the amount of laundry, the number of towels, the amount of cutlerly used in eating etc...

[MMATM]

Well it just goes to show, if getting married adds 7 hours of work to a woman's workload and only saves men an hour, that means (mathematically) that men must work 7 times faster than women.

Example:
Man spends 20 hours a week on housework pre-marriage.
Woman spends 20 hours a week on housework pre-marriage.
Net housework done pre-marriage: 40 hours/week.
Man and Woman get married.
Man spends 19 hours a week on housework post-marriage.
Woman spends 27 hours a week on housework post-marriage.
Net housework done post-marriage: 46 hours/week.
Where does that extra six hours a week come from?

As this is before children, they are ruled out as the cause. Here are three widely-read "experts" on the matter:

Dr. S. E. Chsistman, Ph.D, Men's Studies: "The source of the extra work is nonexistent. Clearly this example demonstrates that the woman, in attempting to take on some of the man's duties, is unable to perform those tasks as adeptly as her male counterpart, causing her to take longer to complete each task. The end result is a six-hour increase in net work time with no increase in net work done. Presumably this wasted time will slightly decrease as the woman learns to perform some of the man's duties around the house, but it is safe to assume that the man will always be expected to do the majority of the work he has always done, as his wife will be simply unable to perform the tasks in a timely fashion."

Susan "Venus" Smith, author, The Scourge is Man: "Obviously this data is either falsified by the sexist, male-controlled media or is at best a demonstration of excessive male demands on women. Obviously the same amount of work must be done pre- and post-marriage and the so-called 'man of the house' is merely finding more and more work for his newly-acquired wife to do in order to perpetuate her enslavement to him. It is clear that the men's workload is grossly exaggerated, as men who have secured themselves slaves wives for life are disinclined to ever perform any but the most simple and convenient housework tasks. This is why I've written my exhaustive study on the subject of male-domination and its effects on society and especially women who are inclined to marry. The entirety of the study can be found in chapters eight through twenty-four of my book, The Scourge is Man, which is available only through special order on my website, thescourgeisman (dot) com."

Mrs. Elaine Goodman, columnist, The Righteous Times: "What this study can't see is that obviously the reported data is so much more because children haven't been counted in the equation. Everybody knows that almost nobody gets married unless someone screws up and the little whore forgets to take her Plan B or something, and there's a kid on the way. The extra seven hours for the woman is obviously not from the man's share of the work, since the housework should be cut in half between them due to moving in together immediately after marriage and only having one house to take care of. Instead the man gets the ten ours of housework plus nine hours taking care of the stupid bastard child while the woman gets her ten hours plus seventeen extra because she has to nurse the child and take care of it while the man's away looking for work, since everybody knows the woman's place is in the home. If stupid kids would stop having sex before marriage then this problem wouldn't exist. People would get married at appropriate ages like twenty-five or thirty, and by then they would have enough experience in the real world to support their good Christian children until those children go off on their own to get jobs and give back to their Church and their family for helping them grow up healthy and like good Christians. By not telling kids that such nonsense exists as 'condoms' and 'the pill' and 'Plan B' and abolishing the murder of unborn children, kids won't know what their nasty parts are for until their parents tell them, after they're married and responsible enough to have children. Obviously this 'sex education' is to blame, since there's nothing good about learning that sort of trash at such a young age. Read my column in The Righteous Times, a biweekly publication for good Christians everywhere."




*The preceding commentary contains the opinions of the parties involved, and does not necessarily reflect the policies or views of MMATM, his affiliated friends and/or his family.

[Broomjockey]

MMATM: What. The. Hell. Where did that stuff come from? Did you make that up? Pleaaaaaaaase tell me you made those quotes up.

[MMATM]

Of course I made those quotes up.

Sorry for the confusion.

Really, though, I thought the names would clue people in. Dr. S. E. Chsistman? As in "sexistman"? And the names "venus" and "goodman" for the other two, not to mention the omission of a "Ms." or "Mrs." for the second "expert", and the The Scourge is Man and The Righteous Times? Broomjockey, I'm a little disappointed.

But to clear up the confusion, I didn't in fact come up with all of this myself. I was aided by this site in designing the awful personalities. (Work safe, but doesn't look anything like a work-related site, so be careful with it if you'll get in trouble for surfing on the job.)

[tropicsgoddess]

I like the line, "For men, tying the knot saves an hour of weekly chores."

To me, that's a joke.

After watching my mum slaving herself tired doing housework, and my auntie POLISHING her copper plumbing pipes every flaming day, I decided housework was a con, or an OCD reaction to being bored senseless by the environment.

Housework grows to fill the time you are willing to allot to it - don't be a good little wife, get yourself a good little life.

You said it!!

Since the day we got our own place, it's hard to get my fiancé to do any house cleaning. Hell when it comes down to doing the yard work he drags his ass,but not so much with the cooking. Men, go figure.

[CaroPhoenix]

Gah!!! PuckishOne! Now I have to put "Alphabetize spice rack" on my "To Do List". Why did you have to come up with that?

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Men make more housework for their wives? Stop the freaking presses. Must be a slow news day.

[symposes]

We men wouldnt create more work for our wives, if our wives could accept our defintion of clean.

So theres a little dust there. Have you been outside lately?

Nah, the dishes can wait until they stink, It only takes 30-40 minutes once every week to wash a full sink load, why spend 10 minutes each day for 70 minutes of time to wash the same number of dishes?

Why put the clean cloths away, just throw them in a pile, and when the pile becomes almost non-existant, then its time to wash cloths again. And hell you can save time there, by just dumping all of them into 1 machine, or 2, at the same time at the Laundry Mat.
Why bother sorting them, you dont wear a set of cloths that are all the same color do you? then why wash them like they are all different colors? Hell if you bought all your socks in a matching way, you wouldnt need to sort them either... Besides this shirt is *sniffsniff* still clean.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

That's it, really. Men use the word "clean" differently that I do.

It used to be my husband's job to sweep the floor. Our old place had a white kitchen floor. He'd let it get far filthier than I liked before he was moved to clean it. I don't like to nag or bitch. I also don't like feeling resentful. And I SURE as hell don't like doing his chores for him. So you know what I did?

I'd take some dried oreganno and sprinkle in on the floor. He'd see it, decide the floor was dirty enough, and grab the broom.

He had no idea he was being played, I got what I wanted, and no fighting over it occured.

Manipulative? Sure. But at least I use my powers for Good instead of Evil.

[Hello Kitty]

I'd take some dried oreganno and sprinkle in on the floor. He'd see it, decide the floor was dirty enough, and grab the broom.

That is too awesome! I'll definitely have to try that trick.

[Broomjockey]

Broomjockey, I'm a little disappointed.

Obviously your faith in humanity's a little healthier than mine, because I could see some of that stuff being said by Grade A Wackos. And we all know, it's the Wackos that get the most accolades in fields like that