Dear Abby's best invitation ever!

[Kiwi]

Dear Abby

The second letter for today about the invitation.

You know as "rude" as the invitation is, I know a few people who wish they could have sent it for their events. I would LOVE to use it for my wedding invitation.

Some of my friends have had their weddings, funerals for loved ones and childrens birthday parties ruined because someone always has to cause trouble and drama.

[Shpepper]

I like it. It's nothing more than a "leave your drama at the door" note. I am usually the one that has to go around soothing people and making it all better for them. It gets old after awhile and it makes it hard to enjoy the party as well.

Happened at my wedding. A friend decided that my wedding would be a good time to get all over someone elses case about something that happened in the past that should have just been left for dead. I as the bride had to go around and soothe everyones spirits and try to make it all better. it ended up that several people left earlier than they planned because of it and I went off to the bar and got quietly drunk by myself. If I'd had a note like that maybe it wouldn't have happened.

[HorrorFrogPrincess]

Yeah, I really didn't agree with her in this case. It may be "rude", but guests these days are just place AWFUL. That straight up mapped out everything expected, especially the RSVP line.

Of course, I'd probably hire a doorman/bouncer who lets only people on the Responded list in. Planning for a very small party.

[Cats]

While I think it could have gotten the point across a bit nicer, some people really are dumb and need to be told BLUNTLY.

And after all, in a sense, "its my party and I'll cry if I f**king want to". If they want to make an invitation like that, what rules say they can't? With one exception, my bro and sister in law made a rule that no one under 18 was going to their wedding. Did it piss people off? Well, at least one of them to my knowledge, but it was their wedding, their call. When you're being INVITED somewhere, you are the GUEST, NOT the people calling the shots.

It even says right there...if you don't want to go, DON'T!

[Boozy]

There are things you place on an invitation, and things that you find subtler ways of conveying.

The inviter should have called up select invitees (the ones she thought might cause trouble) and have a friendly chat with them. There are polite ways of saying what she wants without putting it on the invitation.

As it is, she's essentially accusing every invitee of being an ignorant boor who needs basic courtesy spelled out for them. That's a rude assumption to make.

And besides, if literally every single one of her invitees is a complete savage, why is she hosting a party for them?

[Kiwi]

The inviter should have called up select invitees (the ones she thought might cause trouble) and have a friendly chat with them.

I think the only problem with that is if she has to be so blunt about their behaviour, pointing out that they personally are a bad guest wouldn't go down in a friendly manner. If someone is that unaware or uncaring that they need to be told to settle down there isn't much hope.

And besides, if literally every single one of her invitees is a complete savage, why is she hosting a party for them?

well shes hosting the party for her daughter, not for them. I don't see why the daughters party should be ruined because people can't drop the drama for one day

[blas]

I say just don't invite them.

It infuriated me that my mother insisted on inviting some of my relatives that I absolutely despise (my great aunt and uncle, the two who neglected my Nanna...my hatred of them began way before that, though. That just intensified it) to my grad party. Mom's excuse? "They are faaaaaaamily."

Sure, family is family. I have to love them, but I don't have to like them.

Mom may have been able to control who came to all my birthday parties growing up and my grad party, but I will be damned if she thinks she can control who I invite to my wedding (if Hell ever freezes over and the right guy comes along) or children's b-day parties.

[AdminAssistant]

Mom may have been able to control who came to all my birthday parties growing up and my grad party, but I will be damned if she thinks she can control who I invite to my wedding (if Hell ever freezes over and the right guy comes along) or children's b-day parties.

Damn skippy. One thing I already know is that there won't be any young children, at all. I'd just as soon not have any kids except my neice and nephew, who will be part of the ceremony. And if some of my redneck relatives can't handle being in the same room as some of my gay friends, then they can leave. There's a whole section of family that I'd just as soon not come.

Of course, this will be shortly after blas, and we can release the flying pigs at the end.

[Kiwi]

Im dreading dealing with K's side of the family when it comes time for our wedding

he has
an overtly racist alcoholic uncle
a pothead aunt who smokes up in front of her kids
a brother with extreme anxiety who can't leave the house very often
an aunt and uncle who are uber born again christians who greet everyone with "have you been saved yet"
and an aunt who is a lawyer who constantly bitches to me about illegal immigrants and how they are stealing all Canadians jobs and ruining the country... because being an immigrant myself I MUST KNOW THEM

and thats just on his fathers side... his mothers side is... even worse if you can believe that

not to mention his mother... who made up a story about my K introducing himself to my brother with "hey Im the guy whos sleeping with your sister" NOT TRUE K was very friendly towards my brother and then proceeds to tell this story to everyone we meet.... even though she has been told its not true many many times

then an large assortment (15 plus) of cousins and second cousins all with very young children who will want to bring their kids, who run riot at family gatherings

no wonder I want to get married in NZ and I identify with the blunt invite! Mine would say "leave your political, racial and generally disgusting opinions at the door please"

[gremcint]

Last year a friend of mine died. I was friends with both her and her husband. I was at the funeral and her mother attended. Her mother and her had been estranged for years because her mother is a psychotic b****, part way through the sermon from the preacher she turns to the husband (one of my best friends) and says "why is he ignoring me?" because the priest hadn't really mentioned her because my friend had had almost nothing to do with her mother for a couple years. My friend (the husband) got up for his part of the Eulogy and he added a couple parts about the Mother that I later found out were fictious to prevent her from causing a scene at her own daughter's funeral.

I personally don't think that that invitation was out of line at all.

[edible_hat]

It may be "rude", but

the people it's aimed at are ruder.

[Amina516]

I had people pissed off at me b/c I restricted kids 10 and younger from attending my wedding. It was in a freaking art gallery! Meaning anything they f'ed up, I woulda had to pay for! The only ones permitted were my son and 2 nephews(and the flower girl). I heard some snarky comments about it and some people insisted then that they wouldn't come, but come wedding day there was a full house and no kids. LOL.

It was nicely worded on the invite so they can just suck it.

[tropicsgoddess]

It's a bit much, but for the most part I don't blame them for having that sort of thing on the invites. Some people can be so rude and thoughtless.

[XCashier]

part way through the sermon from the preacher she turns to the husband (one of my best friends) and says "why is he ignoring me?" because the priest hadn't really mentioned her

Oh, don't worry honey, you'll get all the mention and all the spotlight at your own funeral.

Seriously, what kind of person acts like that at her own child's funeral?! That goes beyond merely rude straight into territory.