Dear....

[monolayth]

Dear Shangri,

I want video

Curious as well,

Monolayth

[Evil Queen]

Dear Shangra-la,

You did it now. I'm not cleaning up the mess.

RetailWorkhorse's sibling,
-EQ

[Shangri-laschild]

Dear monolayth,

Of course!

Shangri-laschild



Dear Evil Queen,

Having to clean up the mess is so worth it for a big enough boom.

Shangri-laschild

[Becks]

Dear TequilaSunrise,

Grrrrrrrrrrrr.



--another Brewers fan

[Evil Queen]

Dear Shangri-la,

Then I would like a link to the vedio as well. It would make our mother so proud. (Seriously, I think it would.)

-EQ

[CaroPhoenix]

Dear Plumber,

I am now $676.75 poorer. However, I now do have a disposal that doesn't gush water everywhere when I use it and I got a brand spanking new faucet too! However, why is labor $325??? I understand the privilege of having you come out and do the dirty work, but $325? Now I want to go back to school to be a plumber just to make that type of money.

Thank you,
A grateful homeowner,
IDaR

-------------------------------------------
Dear Husband,

We will be eating in for the next couple of months because of this expense. And if your family doesn't like the fact we can't contribute a lot of $$ to your mother's birthday fiasco, err, dinner, then you know what? They can bite my shiny metal a$$.

Your Loving Wife who is not a fan of your family at all,
IDaR

[Saydrah]

Dear Life,

You suck this week.

-


Dear Anniversary,

Stop coinciding with sad shit, huh?

-Not Celebrating


Dear Doxycycline, Enroflaxin, Azithromycin, and nebulization,

WORK DAMN YOU!

-Sad Rat Mom


Dear Lucky Soap,

I know you helped me get this job and helped my brother and his fiancee both sell their houses in a crappy market, but do you have one more miracle in you? My SO doesn't need to lose his favorite rat right now. He's already losing his grandfather slowly.

-Hope for Soap


Dear Paycheck,

I don't mind spending most of you on my animals. That's part of pet ownership. But if you could just double this month, somehow, that would be really, really nice. $500 of vet bills is interfering with my plans to go to Pennsylvania and get my new foundation doe!

-Where's That Stimulus?



Dear Awesome Coworker,

Damn, it's pretty sweet you got into that grad program and can be closer to your girl! I'm going to really miss you, though.

-Pouting Coworker



Dear Ember,

Thank you for always being there when I need you. I might have saved your life once when I pulled you out of that kill auction in Pennsylvania without ever meeting you, and got you the knee surgery you needed, but you've saved my life and sanity so many times since then. Good karma does exist, and it has carrot breath.

-Bringer of Carrots

[daleduke17]

Dear Irv:

How 'bout them Marlins?



With love,
A Marlins fan

Dear Florida Marlins -

Thank you for throwing in Mike Lowell when the Red Sox acquired Josh Beckett. They are both kicking ass.

Signed,
A Red Sox fan.

[iradney]

Dear batter recipe

Thanks for turning out so well. Not only did I batter some fish, I made some awesome cinnamon dumplings as well!
Now I'm stuffed

love
rads

[crazylegs]

Dear Rads,

Any leftovers?

Crazylegs

[iradney]

Dear CL (aka Pooks)

Alas, no But fly on down next time I make em, I'll keep some warm for you

rads

[Tanasi]

Dear Idiot in the Lexus,
Just because traffic law doesn't extend to parking lots, it still doesn't mean you can drive all willy-nilly just because you want to. Those lines are painted on the asphault for a reason, you're supposed to stay within them not drive across them because that could cause a collision. Now I have a crunched passenger door and running board and you have a crunched front end. It tickled me that your air-bags went off and that will probably be just enough to total your car. Maybe just maybe if you'd take that phone out of you ear you could pay enough attention to your driving to avoid causing collisions but then again that would be asking too much. And another thing I'm not going to use your husband's guy to fix my truck, I'll get my own estimates and then your insurance can pay off based on that and I'll do the work myself and pocket a big chuck of cash can you say new tires?
When your husband calls later I'm going to suggest he paint "Stupid Driver" on your car as a warning to other motorists.

T


Dear FIL,
Your DSL going down doesn't consititute an emergency. Don't call me call BellSouth or whatever they're calling themselves these days. I have no way of checking online to see what's wrong, I can only do that for my customers and since you're not a customer... well you do the math.

Your SIL,


Dear Mom and MIL,
The next time you check Zellie out of school without my or my wife's permission will be the last time you will be able to see that child unsupervised. Jimmy and Robby called in a panic when they couldn't find their little sister, and since I didn't know and the wife didn't know well I hope you understand our feelings.
I know you didn't mean any harm but you did cause some harm, and Mom as you so often told me "Think before you do."

T


Dear Zellie,
Honey I know I've told you time and time again to obey Grand-Mommy and Nanna just like you do me and Mommy but if you're leaving school make sure that Robby and Jimmy know you're leaving. They were scared half to death when they couldn't find you after school. Also if Mommy or I didn't tell you before school that Grand-Mommy, Nanna, or Papaw is going to check you out early then also call me and Mommy. I'm not blaming you for anything just do as Daddy asks. OK sweetie you can go back to playing with your rabbits.

Your Daddy,


Dear Robby and Jimmy,
Now I know I've raised you right, you thought more of your sister's welfare than your own and I'm proud of my boys. Jimmy when you leave for school in a few months I'll miss you more than you can know but you're following in your old man's and both grandfather's footsteps and will be the 9th generation to serve in the armed forces.

You Dad,

[crazylegs]

Dear Bloues

Next time I'm there, I'll take you up on it!

Pooks.

[flyinghi]

Dear Roomate

You re the best roomate I've had and I love ya. I'm sorry you re out of work I know How tough it can be on someone But if you don't clean up your act and stop drinking yourself stupid and think it's perfectly alright and funny to be hung the fuck over and lazy all the next day I'm going to be forced to look for another roomate and kick your alcoholic ass out


I'll be damned if I walk away from this sweet apartment because of your asshatery

yours truly

flyinghi

[Becks]

Dear USPS,

Where the hell is my package from my sister? She was told it would get here in 5 or 6 days...and she sent it on May 5th.

Trying to be patient,

Becky

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear FoH,

How come my shopping bag/cart had four items before I checked out, but only three after I paid? The 4th item was in stock. I want those panties, damn it, but I don't feel like paying another $11 for unnecessary shipping.

Not happy,

Becky