Okay, I'm going to preface this by saying that I have absolutely NO problem with religion. I don't practice anything myself, nor do I feel that if there is a God, he is all that important in my life. Just my beliefs. I also have no problem who hold their religions sacred, but please don't impose them on me. I don't appreciate it.
This experience though, it left me flat out "WTF"ing. This man was well meaning, sure, but the way his attitude sharply changed just really sent me spinning.
Yesterday I stopped by the cafeteria of my school to grab lunch before going to class. I'm friendly with the woman who swipes cards at the entrance, and on my way out she showed me a picture of her newly born granddaughter. The baby? SO freaking cute. I wished her congratulations and asked after the mother. She was jokingly telling me about how she was pretty sure her daughter never wanted to go through the birthing process again. I laughed and told her that my family could save all the child-having for my brother, who's getting married in August.
I'm 20 years old and can honestly say that children are not in my life plan. If my biological clock tells me otherwise, fine, but until that happens, I just don't want kids. I don't really see this as an issue. I was telling her such and also saying that my partner always jokes about he'd mess our kids up, so in reality I'm saving them a whole mess of trouble . I then told her that even though my brother is getting married, I don't really think it's for me.
As we're talking this much older gentleman comes up and starts just looking at me. His staring was making me uncomfortable. Once I said that I wasn't sure about getting married, he interjects himself into our conversation. He told me that if that was the case I needed to come see him, since he was a Family and Marriage Counsellor, all the while touching my shoulder. The shoulder thing kind of freaked me out, but I let it go, laughing it off and telling him that I'm only 20 and I don't want to think about marriage. He insists that of course I don't, that it shouldn't be until I was older. I then started talking about how I just wanted to think about graduating and moving in with my partner first.
Abruptly, he continues staring. The friend/employee, sensing my massive discomfort, shrugs it off and says that it's good that I know what I want out of life. He continues to stare. I tell him that it's okay, I know I want to live with him since we've been together 5ish years and that I've practically been living with him when I'm not in school anyway for the past 2. I just don't know if marriage is right for me.
At this point he starts to back away, looking at me like I've said something insanely wrong. Then he makes the sign of the cross over his body several times as he walks away, all the while still staring at me . Friendployee is no longer laughing, but is just standing there uncomfortably. I, naturally, am freaked the fuck out. He wasn't joking, he was dead serious as he started making the cross at me. It was clear the reason he was doing it was because I wanted to live with a man out of wedlock.
My partner and I are in a tightly committed relationship. We take all the precautions in the world to keep ourselves safe and make sure there aren't any unexpected pregnancies. I see myself spending the rest of my life with him. It just really bothered me to see him look so horrified, like I was the devil. Clearly it's not enough. I need a ring on my finger for everything to be legit.
This experience though, it left me flat out "WTF"ing. This man was well meaning, sure, but the way his attitude sharply changed just really sent me spinning.
Yesterday I stopped by the cafeteria of my school to grab lunch before going to class. I'm friendly with the woman who swipes cards at the entrance, and on my way out she showed me a picture of her newly born granddaughter. The baby? SO freaking cute. I wished her congratulations and asked after the mother. She was jokingly telling me about how she was pretty sure her daughter never wanted to go through the birthing process again. I laughed and told her that my family could save all the child-having for my brother, who's getting married in August.
I'm 20 years old and can honestly say that children are not in my life plan. If my biological clock tells me otherwise, fine, but until that happens, I just don't want kids. I don't really see this as an issue. I was telling her such and also saying that my partner always jokes about he'd mess our kids up, so in reality I'm saving them a whole mess of trouble . I then told her that even though my brother is getting married, I don't really think it's for me.
As we're talking this much older gentleman comes up and starts just looking at me. His staring was making me uncomfortable. Once I said that I wasn't sure about getting married, he interjects himself into our conversation. He told me that if that was the case I needed to come see him, since he was a Family and Marriage Counsellor, all the while touching my shoulder. The shoulder thing kind of freaked me out, but I let it go, laughing it off and telling him that I'm only 20 and I don't want to think about marriage. He insists that of course I don't, that it shouldn't be until I was older. I then started talking about how I just wanted to think about graduating and moving in with my partner first.
Abruptly, he continues staring. The friend/employee, sensing my massive discomfort, shrugs it off and says that it's good that I know what I want out of life. He continues to stare. I tell him that it's okay, I know I want to live with him since we've been together 5ish years and that I've practically been living with him when I'm not in school anyway for the past 2. I just don't know if marriage is right for me.
At this point he starts to back away, looking at me like I've said something insanely wrong. Then he makes the sign of the cross over his body several times as he walks away, all the while still staring at me . Friendployee is no longer laughing, but is just standing there uncomfortably. I, naturally, am freaked the fuck out. He wasn't joking, he was dead serious as he started making the cross at me. It was clear the reason he was doing it was because I wanted to live with a man out of wedlock.
My partner and I are in a tightly committed relationship. We take all the precautions in the world to keep ourselves safe and make sure there aren't any unexpected pregnancies. I see myself spending the rest of my life with him. It just really bothered me to see him look so horrified, like I was the devil. Clearly it's not enough. I need a ring on my finger for everything to be legit.
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