I've lost my trust

[BookstoreEscapee]

I agree...change the account now. Your mom should still be able to deposit money into it, anyway (my parents used to take my deposits to the credit union branch in their office building all the time; my mom's name was on the account but my dad's wasn't). However, if her name is on the account they may need her signature to take it off.

[blas]

That may be the hard part if true, I'm sure my poor little sister's mum probably doesn't want to end the free access to her funds!

[iradney]

Well, if she can't CLOSE the account, surely she should be able to withdraw all except..oh say 2 bucks? And put em into an account that only McG can access - yes? no? Influence with large hammer?

[McGoddess09]

Actually, my mom is willing to go with me to sign off on the account. She did apologize a bunch of times, but as I told her "I was gone for almost three weeks. How can I trust you when I'm gone for school?" And honestly, she agrees with that.

Yesterday, I told her how I felt about things. Of course, she got angry. Now, there is tension in the house.

I did tell my grandmother about what happened and she is not happy with my mom.

Oh. I found out that I had $300 in there. I had more, but I told her she could use some for important bills about a year ago. She promised to pay me back that one, but never did, of course. She took out the $250, leaving me with only $50, which is the amount needed to keep the account up.

My grandmother told me I should not put anymore money in my account until I get the money from her and get her off. It's been difficult to get her down to the bank, since she's been spending all her free time with her bf, at his softball games.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I hate to be negative here, but you ain't never gonna see that money again. Don't waste time and energy trying to get it back.

Concentrate on preserving what you have left, as others have said. Can you grandparents help you, if you need it? You can set up another account that she cannot access. If she needs money she can ask you and you can say yes or no as you see fit.

[taxguykarl]

Actually, my mom is willing to go with me to sign off on the account. She did apologize a bunch of times, but as I told her "I was gone for almost three weeks. How can I trust you when I'm gone for school?" And honestly, she agrees with that.

Or so she says. As a crime-avoidance speaker noted: Criminals will say whatever you want to hear to get you to comply while they rob or rape you. She will pull a similar stunt again given half a chance.

It's been difficult to get her down to the bank, since she's been spending all her free time with her bf, at his softball games.

Notice that he has time for softball games, but not to get a job to work on his support debt?!

Does you mom work? It wouldn't surprise me at all if BF is trying to get on your mom's next tax return. See if you can get her to fill out an 8857, and a 12507 (both innocent spouse relief forms). Peruse this for more info.

Otherwise, if she marries him, their joint refund WILL be intercepted to pay his support debt. I've seen more refunds blocked for child support than back taxes or student loans. With no innocent spouse filing, it is irrelevant who has the debt.

I hate to be negative here, but you ain't never gonna see that money again.

I have to agree with that--don't bet the tuition money on seeing anything from your mom or her BF. Maybe you can collect something by dragging her onto a TV small claims show or Jerry Springer.

[Der Cute]

Bank of America is doing a promotion to open accounts (Free money, tbh).

You go to Bank of America online, and use the promotion code GROUP50.
Do a direct deposit (ACH transfer) from any other acct to the new one, and you will get $50 bux free, after 90 days.

I made $50 off of that promotion recently. Pulled the cash out and closed it too.

But.

If/ When you open a new bank account, gather the paperwork for it and put it in storage!!!

Your mother is trying to keep that account open so she can pull money out of it as she sees fit. And your "seeing fit" does not jive with hers. Frankly, she's stealing. RK said it right - that cash ain't coming back.

So walk your behind down to a different bank, and open another account up. And don't tell your mother. If she needs money that bad, her BF can start working to get her some!

Cutenoob

[It shouldn't]

So walk your behind down to a different bank, and open another account up. And don't tell your mother.

That!

Just start depositing your paychecks into the new account. See if you can set it up for online/paperless banking, That way you won't get a monthly paper statement mailed to your house, to clue her in.

The written re-payment agreement is also a good idea.

Do try to get her to find time to accompany you to the old bank to close the account and get the rest of your money out, to at least keep that safe.

Good luck.

[blas]

It also helps to have a debit card versus having cash on you. But with that, you'll also have to make sure you never leave your purse laying around.

[Eric the Grey]

I'm curious what kind of account it is. If it's just a regular 'ol saving or checking account, you have no recourse.

However, if it was set up as an FBO (For the Benefit Of) account, then she's broken the law, and more than once from what I read here. An FBO account can ONLY be used by the minor or individual who it was set up for, and CANNOT be used by the parents to pay bills with. This is a typical type of account used for parents to save money for the children's college.

So you may have some leverage if you feel you need it, although depending on how it was set up, you may not be able to just pull the money out yourself without going to the authorities.

Regardless, good luck on handling this.


Eric the Grey

[Midnight12]

as i'm sure someone has already said, whats so great about the bf that she has to treat you the way she did. first clue he had unpaid child support. first clue there. so yes agreed. good luck and you have our support

[McGoddess09]

I appreciate the advice, but as I have mentioned before, the account is set up where only my mom can withdraw money. Even though I'm 18, I can't. So I can't take the money out without her knowing.

This next paycheck, I'm taking my happy butt down to another bank to open a checking account and setting up a direct deposit with work. Then, I'm taking her down to my current bank and getting her off of that savings account and I'm going to make that into a college fund for my sister that I will start and she can continue when she gets a job.

[tropicsgoddess]

I appreciate the advice, but as I have mentioned before, the account is set up where only my mom can withdraw money. Even though I'm 18, I can't. So I can't take the money out without her knowing.

This next paycheck, I'm taking my happy butt down to another bank to open a checking account and setting up a direct deposit with work. Then, I'm taking her down to my current bank and getting her off of that savings account and I'm going to make that into a college fund for my sister that I will start and she can continue when she gets a job.

Good idea on setting up an account for your little sis and direct deposit. Most of the jobs I've had with direct deposit and I have to say direct deposit is AWESOME!!! It'll take a week or two depending on who you and your employers bank with for the direct deposit to take effect, but it makes life so much easier.
Before my family and I switched from bank A to bank B, my mom setup an account for me when I was a minor (along with my sisters...which were separate), so I couldn't do much except deposit money. But when we switched to the other bank, I was 20 so I was able to open my own account in my name.

[gremcint]

sounds like she's avoiding going to the bank. Wait till she's at home during the day, ask her if she wants to watch a movie. Then say if you have enough time to watch a movie then you have time to come to the bank with me right now, let's go. and drag her out the door.

[blas]

And nowso, more than ever, if things get to be too much to handle, get your happy butt up here and stay a spell.