What part of "I don't drink alcohol" do you not understand?

[draggar]

Last night my wife and I were meeting up with a friend of her's for dinner and she had me go get two bottles of Sidra,

When I came home she commented they were for me. I reminded her that I don't drink.

W: Well you need to drink something.
Me: Water will be fine.
W: You can't just drink water.
Me: Why not? It's liquid.
W: Because you need to drink something.

Rinse and repeat for about 20 minutes.

She actually angered me quite a bit. WTF is wrong with NOT drinking alcohol? I don't like the taste of alcohol so why would I drink it??

And why the HELL do people feel they have to push me to drink? We're in our 30's, it's not like we're in high school at someone's house whose parents are away. We're not kids anymore. I'm grown up and I can make my own decisions - I don't want to drink and water is fine. Please respect that.

Of course, when we get there they offer me a drink and I say "water is fine" and my wife pipes up "he needs to be the designated driver".

I get this at work outings and I just brush it off. i sometimes got it in college and I brushed it off.

But getting this from my WIFE whom I've ben married ot for over 8 years? What the hell!!

[BookstoreEscapee]

I would hope after 8 years your wife would know better. If someone I'm with doesn't drink, I just accept that. I'm not a big drinker myself, and given the opportunity, I don't always partake, anyway. If I have to drive within an hour or so, I won't drink, and if I haven't eaten much I usually won't either, since it just puts me to sleep. I'm a total lightweight.

I have no problem drinking water or soda out of a wine glass. (I like wine glasses. They make me feel like a grownup. I don't like wine, though.)

[Eireann]

I don't drink alcohol either, and it's truly incredible to see some people's reactions:

"What do you do for fun?" (What, you need to drink alcohol to have fun?)
"What DO you drink?"
"Aw, come on. One won't hurt."

And on, and on, and on. I eat what I like, drink what I like, wear what I like, etc. People need to learn to butt the hell out on issues like this.

[draggar]

I don't drink alcohol either, and it's truly incredible to see some people's reactions:

"What do you do for fun?" (What, you need to drink alcohol to have fun?)
"What DO you drink?"
"Aw, come on. One won't hurt."

And on, and on, and on. I eat what I like, drink what I like, wear what I like, etc. People need to learn to butt the hell out on issues like this.

I also love these responses:

"Were you in a drunk and driving accident?"
No.
"Oh, then you must have lost a god friend due to someone who was drunk and driving?"
No.
"You're nor diabetic, are you?" (I get this one once in a while).
No, I am not.
"Then why don't you drink?"
Because I don't like the taste of alcohol.

Sometimes I'm even accused of being a recovering alcoholic.

That response usually gets some snobbish remark. I don't know what it is about alcohol - people expect you to love it no matter what. There are many things out there that people don't like so they don't eat or drink it - why is alcohol any different?

BTW - she also told her friends that I love Woodchuck. Really? I had it once and it made me up-chuck. Of course, my wife loves it (makes me wonder why she told them that *I* love it??).

[protege]

I don't drink alcohol either, and it's truly incredible to see some people's reactions:

"What do you do for fun?" (What, you need to drink alcohol to have fun?)
"What DO you drink?"
"Aw, come on. One won't hurt."

I never understood that either. When my then-girlfriend and I were downtown for New Years several years ago, we didn't drink at all. Neither one of us drank. Can't really say I missed having alcohol that night. I mean, I still had to deal with the drunks driving home. But, when I took her home (she lived in a small town about 50 miles south), quite a few people acted like we'd killed their firstborn by not getting totally smashed.

Now though, I do drink a bit. Not much--a glass of wine or two with dinner, maybe a Woodchuck on the weekends. That's about it. What can I say, other than I don't *need* alcohol to have a good time. But, it does make certain relatives tolerable

[Amina516]

My husband also is in the crowd who doesnt like alcohol. Every once in a great while he will take a shot of some good vodka (only thing he'll drink) but other than that hes DD for life..which is good for me.

I DO kinda understand your wife, Draggar. I want a drink sometimes but dont like to drink alone....I try to pester my husband into a glass of wine or something but he always declines. Its just nice to not feel like the lone alcoholic I guess. Lol.

[Reyneth]

Count me in as another not-very-often and not-very-much drinker. So the people I go out with know this and they expect it and don't make a deal about it.

I'm with BookstoreEscapee though - I'm a bit disgusted on draggar's behalf that his wife feels it is acceptable to act this way about a preference and a choice he has made - that he 100% has the right to make!

[blas]

This is the bad part of having a boyfriend with a bad alcohol problem, and friends who have no greater hobbies than drinking.

One of my friends at my other friend's wedding was actually BULLYING me to drink up, drink up, more more more!!!!!! at the reception, even though I had to drive....and she literally could not get it through her thick skull that I did NOT need to be drunk to have fun and that alcohol was NOT the biggest part of the night.

I get really mad at my boyfriend when we go out to dinner or a movie and when we leave, he asks if I want to go to the bar or begs me to call my friends (because he knows they are always at the bar at night) so we can go out for a few.

I got really, really sick of party party party party hardy hardy hardy once I turned about 22. I mean really. I like to go out every once in a while, but I do not enjoy being drunk, hungover, and I hate it when people cannot function without alcohol.

I get the feeling a lot of people I know think I'm boring or a goody two shoes because I don't drive drunk or I don't always want to drink, or because sometimes I just don't feel like it. My boyfriend constantly makes me feel that way, and some of my friends just make me feel like I'm a Mary Poppins loser.

[NightWatch]

Your WIFE of EIGHT years said that? WTF? My friends learned to not pester me when I chose not to drink when they'd start hounding me and I would just leave.

Personally, I like the occasional drink, and I think I would have a hard time with someone who flat out doesn't drink ever. Probably because the handful of people I've known who don't drink were idiots about it and it put a bad taste in my mouth.

For example: I had a 6 pack of beer in a fridge at this guys house for a while. I'd drink one beer and he'd try to get in my pants and tease me about being wasted. Cuz ya know, ONE beer so gets me trashed (hint, it really doesn't). Then when he had a really traumatic life experience he was going on about how he was afraid he'd be tempted to drink one of my beers and that it would make him a raging alcoholic.. for drinking ONE beer.

But I live in a state where the majority of people who don't drink, don't for religious reasons. Not because they just don't like it. I think my dad is the only person I know who simply doesn't like the taste.

(PS: "religious reasons" would normally not be something I'd talk smack on, but as Smiley can likely confirm, in our state, the religious majority is very oppressive of their youth. They typically use fear tactics and misinformation to keep their teens/young adults from engaging in sex and alcohol use. Not all people who are part of that religion are that way, but it's enough of that religious population to create a stereotype.)

[blas]

I'm not that surprised. A lot of people are very disrespectful of other's choices...

[NightWatch]

I'm not that surprised. A lot of people are very disrespectful of other's choices...

I've always got the feeling that these people are trying to convince themselves that their behavior is normal more then they are trying to convince you to drink.

I realized that when I had a friend who was extremely dependent and clingy. She's an alcoholic, but she wants to be justified in doing it.

[blas]

I should write a book "Dealing With Drunks"......my mother's side of the family is full of them, and dating one......

Yep, you are so right you don't even know it. You are the one that is weird and has a problem, not them!

[Jester]

Unlike most of the people commenting here, I am definitely a drinker, often referring to myself as a drunk and/or a barfly. I like bars. I like booze. I like the taste of beer, rum, wine, margaritas, and even occasionally whiskey. I enjoy drinking beer with food, and I enjoy drinking just by itself. And I won't lie....I do enjoy being drunk. (And I do it so well!)

WTF is wrong with NOT drinking alcohol? I don't like the taste of alcohol so why would I drink it??

And why the HELL do people feel they have to push me to drink?

So, as a self-professed drunk and lover of alcohol, I have to ask....what in Zeus' butthole is wrong with your wife? Seriously? She's been married to you for eight years, presumably has known you a bit longer than that, knows you don't drink, don't like to drink, and don't like the taste of alcohol, and yet she is not only pushing you to drink, but insisting that you do so? Seriously?

There are two ways I will react when someone tells me they are not drinking.

If I don't know them that well, and they say they DON'T drink, I say, "Cool," and move on.

If they are a friend of mine, and they normally do drink, I ask, "Really? Are you sure? What's up?" But if they insist they are on the wagon, or not drinking that night, or are sick, or just don't feel like it, I'm fine. Their choice. Who am I to tell them otherwise?

My third reaction, when I am not out and about but working behind the bar and someone orders, say, water or tea or soda, is to look at them, point to the door, and say "OUT!"...with a smile on my face. It is, of course, a joke. In all the years I've been doing it, exactly one asshole person was offended by this, apparently not realizing it was a joke, or just not having a sense of humor. Of course I will bring them their beverage of choice, be it water or tequila. Now, some people who were not intending to drink may change their minds when I do this, and actually order an adult beverage, which means, frankly, I am doing my job. But I would never REALLY pressure someone into drinking that honestly doesn't want to. That is idiocy of a criminal nature.

she had me go get two bottles of Sidra...

Okay, I give up. What the hell is Sidra? I've never heard of it.


And slightly off topic: I have noticed that I get odder looks and odder reactions, generally speaking, when I tell people that I do not drink caffeine then when most people say they don't drink. This is especially amusing when people are ordering rounds of "bombs" (some kind of liquor with Red Bull) and I politely decline, or say I will drink one, but without the Red Bull, as I don't drink caffeine. Twice I have had people who were going to buy me a drink refuse to buy me one because I would not do a full-on bomb with them. Hell, their money, their choice, but still, kind of dickish.

Back on topic: to me this whole thing is like trying to get someone who doesn't smoke (like me) to "just try one." Thank you, no. I don't like the smell of cigarettes, I don't think they look cool, I have no desire to try them, and in fact, I have never taken a single puff off of one. Yes, seriously. Never. Not once. I do smoke the occasional and rare cigar, I have smoked some joints in my time, but smoking cigarettes hold about as much interest for me as banging Kathy Bates.

[blas]

Jester, I think you're talking about Jagerbombs....Jagermeister and Redbull.

Of course, if you're at a cheap bar, they won't use real Redbull.

[Jester]

Heheheh, Blas, I am a bartender and a drinker, I KNOW what I'm talking about. Jagerbombs are merely one type of bomb. As you said, Jagermeister and Red Bull (or some other energy drink, depending upon the bar). But they are by no means the only kind of bomb. There are grape bombs, cherry bombs, berry bombs (flavored vodka and Red Bull), O bombs (orange vodka and Red Bull), even bubble bombs (Three Olives Bubble Vodka and Red Bull), and probably a lot more bombs that I can't even think of....since, you know, I don't drink them.

The one bomb I DO drink is an Irish Car Bomb, which has nothing to do with Red Bull. It's a half-filled pint glass of Guinness, into which you drop a shot glass of half Jameson's Irish Whiskey and half Bailey's Irish Cream, and then slam the whole thing!