...Things

[Cat]

I was on a tight leash when I was living with my 'rents....and i left home late in life (no $$ and noone to room with will do that)

I never went out because I hated have to check in all the time....my mother is afraid of the world, and I was expected to be a carbon-copy of her, down to that fear.

Really sucked, because my brother was allowed to do whatever,,,,my rents didnt want to deal with him and his mental illness....so I had to be perfect.


Hiss, growl.

[It shouldn't]

My mother is also on the control freak (OCD) side.

It got so bad that when I moved I wouldn't tell her where I moved to for like a 1/2 year. I also switched jobs at the same time, so for all purposes I dropped of the face of the earth. (no cells or even pagers back then)

Now I live on a different continent and our relationship has somewhat improved. (she's too cheap to call all the time and when she does call I only tell he what she wants to hear)

Being a mother with a grown daughter myself now, I have to say, one does worry and it just puts my mind at ease, when I know where she is hanging out, when she's home on leave.

But whenever I'm about to give my daughter the 3rd degree, I get flashbacks to my youth and bite my tounge. I agree with Jester, I KNOW that because my mother was so controlling, is the reason my daughter had so much freedom. And because she had so much freedom, she has her shit together, is making something of herself and does not get into constant trouble, unlike some of her friends, whose parents held them on tight leashes. Heck, I know that some of the stunts said friends pulled, were done to just rebel against the parents. They came right out and admitted it to me.

Which makes me wonder.........
So my mother was controlling and as a result I went easy on my daughter and allowed her much freedom. Does that mean when my daughter has kids one day, she will be controlling, cause she had too much freedom sometimes.

Hmmm.......... gotta ask her one day. Come to think of it, my mother's mother (my Oma) is a pretty easy going person.

[Hobbs]

Thanks for the advice, y'all. Though now it seems to be a thread to rag on our mother's

It_Shouldn't, I've heard Oma used before, where's that from?

[Jester]

Thanks for the advice, y'all. Though now it seems to be a thread to rag on our mother's

I think it is only those who really don't like their mothers, or who don't like some of their mother's behavior, who are doing this. And perhaps rightfully so.

You may notice that a lot of people are not piping up with horror stories of their mom. Like me. I have said many times on this board how awesome MY mom is, for example. Rarely have I ragged on her here or anywhere else, as there is very little she does that bothers me. Especially since I trained her when I was in college to never call me early in the morning.

Now if only I could get some of my friends to catch on to THAT one.

[It shouldn't]

It_Shouldn't, I've heard Oma used before, where's that from?

Germany

Oma is German for Grandma
Opa is German for Grandpa