I'm 24, educated (I graduated with a BA at 21!), employed, and living with the parents (ugh). It's for financial reasons right now due to the Great Economic Collapse of 2009, but I'm saving my money to get out. I'm reasonably independent (I say reasonably because I'm not financially independent yet, but I'm responsible, reliable, pay my bills, clean up after myself - usually, help out around the house, etc).
My dad is being a complete jerk to me though. I have NO idea why. Lately, he's barely acknowledged me, and when he does, it's completely negative. It's criticism about why I didn't do this right or why I should have known better to do that right or why I screwed this particular thing up....
As I mentioned in a previous thread, they gave me some money to buy work clothes for Christmas. I was out ALL flipping day yesterday and wound up with some shirts. I was showing them my purchases, and all he could do is holler at me about why it doesn't fit right or why it's wrong or blah blah blah. I was asking WHY it doesn't fit right (I thought they fit fine!) so I could LEARN, and he fires back at me! I attempted (at first) to explain that I was trying to learn, but then I gave up. He can be absolutely incorrigible sometimes.
Then, he called me yesterday and was asking me to look for something at home. I explained that I wasn't at home, I was out shopping like Mom and I had discussed and he went on this tirade that I needed to clean my room and do the dishes and etc... I told him that yes, I know, and it will all be done before I go to bed. He hung up on me.
I got home around 530 or so. I briefly showed Mom my shirts (since Dad was camped out in their room) and went to work on cleaning my room. Ok, I admit, my room looked like a tornado had not only touched down, but had hung out for awhile. Most of it was laundry (clean and dirty) that I had neglected and stuff had just piled up. It wasn't dirty, just messy. Dad said my room should never look like that, and he was right - I had let it go too long. I cleaned it though, and then went to work on the dishes. Meanwhile, Mom and Dad went to a holiday party and then out to dinner. They got home around 9, and everything was done. I finished everything around like 8pm or so. When they got home, I proudly told them that everything was done and I had been done for like an hour, and Dad was like "where'd you hide everything?". As most of it was laundry, I deadpanned "the washer machine". He ignored me....
Come this morning, he comes in to wake me up so I can go work on the other house, and he TURNS ALL MY LIGHTS ON (I hate that!) and I was like "ugh...why?" and he's like "so I don't trip on any crap on your floor". I rolled my eyes and rolled over so I wouldn't make a smart comment because I didn't want to start a fight.
THEN, he asked me what my plans were for the day, and I told him that I was going to go exchange those shirts and then head to the other house. He says "no, you'll go to the house first". I was like "it's only going to take a few minutes". He was like "yesterday was supposed to be quick and it took 8 hours". I was like Yesterday was not supposed to be quick, AND I got everything done like I said I would, and I received NO acknowledgment whatsoever! So whatever...I'll go to the other house and exchange my clothes tomorrow and I won't be able to get the same stuff, but he'll be happy. Who cares.
I texted Mom asking if there was something up with him because he's been acting like a jerk lately, but she didn't respond yet. She hates to get int he middle of us because we clash, but I hate to confront him without her because he's a bully and he'll try to intimidate me and then threaten to throw me out if I don't comply or agree.
I CANNOT wait to get out!!
ETA: I don't want this to sound like I'm ungrateful. I am! I get free rent, utilities, food...etc. I guess I'm just a bit miffed that I'm not being treated with respect. I'm not disrespectful to him (even when he's being rude to me), and besides, there's never a good reason to be mean or rude to someone.
My dad is being a complete jerk to me though. I have NO idea why. Lately, he's barely acknowledged me, and when he does, it's completely negative. It's criticism about why I didn't do this right or why I should have known better to do that right or why I screwed this particular thing up....
As I mentioned in a previous thread, they gave me some money to buy work clothes for Christmas. I was out ALL flipping day yesterday and wound up with some shirts. I was showing them my purchases, and all he could do is holler at me about why it doesn't fit right or why it's wrong or blah blah blah. I was asking WHY it doesn't fit right (I thought they fit fine!) so I could LEARN, and he fires back at me! I attempted (at first) to explain that I was trying to learn, but then I gave up. He can be absolutely incorrigible sometimes.
Then, he called me yesterday and was asking me to look for something at home. I explained that I wasn't at home, I was out shopping like Mom and I had discussed and he went on this tirade that I needed to clean my room and do the dishes and etc... I told him that yes, I know, and it will all be done before I go to bed. He hung up on me.
I got home around 530 or so. I briefly showed Mom my shirts (since Dad was camped out in their room) and went to work on cleaning my room. Ok, I admit, my room looked like a tornado had not only touched down, but had hung out for awhile. Most of it was laundry (clean and dirty) that I had neglected and stuff had just piled up. It wasn't dirty, just messy. Dad said my room should never look like that, and he was right - I had let it go too long. I cleaned it though, and then went to work on the dishes. Meanwhile, Mom and Dad went to a holiday party and then out to dinner. They got home around 9, and everything was done. I finished everything around like 8pm or so. When they got home, I proudly told them that everything was done and I had been done for like an hour, and Dad was like "where'd you hide everything?". As most of it was laundry, I deadpanned "the washer machine". He ignored me....
Come this morning, he comes in to wake me up so I can go work on the other house, and he TURNS ALL MY LIGHTS ON (I hate that!) and I was like "ugh...why?" and he's like "so I don't trip on any crap on your floor". I rolled my eyes and rolled over so I wouldn't make a smart comment because I didn't want to start a fight.
THEN, he asked me what my plans were for the day, and I told him that I was going to go exchange those shirts and then head to the other house. He says "no, you'll go to the house first". I was like "it's only going to take a few minutes". He was like "yesterday was supposed to be quick and it took 8 hours". I was like Yesterday was not supposed to be quick, AND I got everything done like I said I would, and I received NO acknowledgment whatsoever! So whatever...I'll go to the other house and exchange my clothes tomorrow and I won't be able to get the same stuff, but he'll be happy. Who cares.
I texted Mom asking if there was something up with him because he's been acting like a jerk lately, but she didn't respond yet. She hates to get int he middle of us because we clash, but I hate to confront him without her because he's a bully and he'll try to intimidate me and then threaten to throw me out if I don't comply or agree.
I CANNOT wait to get out!!
ETA: I don't want this to sound like I'm ungrateful. I am! I get free rent, utilities, food...etc. I guess I'm just a bit miffed that I'm not being treated with respect. I'm not disrespectful to him (even when he's being rude to me), and besides, there's never a good reason to be mean or rude to someone.
Comment