Storyline Thread Game

[purplecat41877]

I had a thread like this a while back but it closed due to being old. Therefore, I've decided to start a new story and the goal is to keep the story moving.

Mrs. Butterpudding had recently gotten a job as a mystery shopper. She decided to go to a supermarket late at night.

"I'm sorry, we're closed," the employee said politely when Mrs. Butterpudding arrived.

"YOU'D BETTER LET ME IN RIGHT NOW OR I'LL HAVE YOU FIRED!!!!" Mrs. Butterpudding screamed, stamping her feet and pounding on the wall. "I'M A MYSTERY SHOPPER AND I DEMAND YOU LET ME IN SO I CAN SHOP!!!! I WANT YOU TO WALK ME TO EVERY ITEM I WANT AND LET ME HAVE THEM ALL FOR FREE!!!! I ALSO WANT YOUR MANAGER'S NAME, PHONE NUMBER, AND ADDRESS SO I CAN REPORT YOU FOR BEING RUDE TO A MYSTERY SHOPPER!!!!"

[Amina516]

"Well," mused the employee, "You're not so much of a mystery anymore are ya?"

Lol.

[lobo94]

Nearby, Lobo and TEB came out of a buffet restaurant, feeling full. It had been a long day at the office.

As they walked toward TEB's car, they saw a woman throwing a tantrum in front of the nearby supermarket. The two friends looked at each other, then back at the tantrum thrower. "Hey, isn't that Betty Butterpudding from when we worked at The Center?" asked TEB.

"Sure is." Lobo had a disgusted look on his face. "And I see she's still as objectionable as ever. I think that clerk could use some help, don't you, Mr. TEB?"

"After you, Mr. Lobo."

They started walking toward the supermarket.

[Magpie]

Mrs. Butterpudding noticed Lobo and TEB walking towards her, and turned to them.

"This store isn't letting me in to do my shopping! Isn't it awful what stores will do to people these days? In this economy you'd think they'd want more people shopping. They're going to drive themselves out of business with this attitude towards customer service if they're not careful!"

[blas]

What Mrs. Butterpudding didn't realize was that there was a hidden camera crew in the bushes, about to put her on the local news for a new nightly feature, "Customers Gone Wild".

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Actually, "Customers Gone Wild" was picked up by the UBS network (slogan: "We put U before the BS.') as a replacement summer program. It's hosted by Jenny McCarthy and retired NFL commentator John Madden, whose job is to provide witty, astute observations.

"WELCOME TO CUSTOMERS GONE WILD!" shrieked an over-caffeinated McCarthy. "We begin today's program with Ms. Betty Butterpudding, who appears to have a bone to pick with the local supermarket. Hope she left some meat on that bone for you, John!"

"Hey Jen!" guffawed Mr. Madden motioning toward his tele-strator. "So here's our situation. Ms. Butterpudding came from over here. And BOOM! she runs right into Lobo and TEB. If the police don't come soon, she'll be yelling at those two for quite a while!"

[TelephoneAngel]

Meanwhile, Telephoneangel was on the phone with a customer.

"I can't hear you", she said, "too much noise in the background"

"yeah" replied her customer, "I'm standing outside a supermarket, dunno what's going on here, but it's very noisy".

[lobo94]

TEB looked at Lobo. Lobo was looking at Betty Butterpudding with a squinty-eyed gaze. And he remembered hearing, back at The Center, that there had been some history. He remembered the day Butterpudding had been fired for being rude to customers both internal and external. Malicious gossip and theft from the company hadn't helped.

"Dingdong, the witch is dead!" Lobo had said.

"WELL, MAYBE IF YOU WEREN'T SO BLOODY STUPID, YOU'D SEE THAT THEY'RE CLOSED!!!" shouted Lobo, bringing TEB back to the here and now. "YOU'RE A FINE ONE TO TALK ABOUT CUSTOMER SERVICE, CONSIDERING YOUR TIME AT THE CENTER!!!"

And then, in a lower, dark, chilling voice:"You suck!"

[purplecat41877]

Just then, Mr. Butterpudding drove into the parking lot. He got out of his car and went over to his wife who was still throwing a fit.

"Honey, I'm so glad you're here," Mrs. Butterpudding said. "I got a job as a mystery shopper and the rude employee won't let me in to shop."

"That's because the store is closed and I've had it with your attitude," Mr. Butterpudding said calmly but firmly. "I want a divorce."

[Nurian]

Everyone except Mrs. Butterpudding let out a gasp at the declaration. She began to laugh. A horrible cackling that filled the night air.

"You fool!" she exclaimed. "I was made a mystery wife just before we were married. I have been secretly cataloging and rating you. And I give you.......0 OUT OF 5 STARS!!! Now no woman will ever want you! BWAAAHAHAHAAAA!!!"

[TelephoneAngel]

Mr Butterpudding remained calm.

"What you don't know", he said "Is that I am the founder of MysteryMystery Enterprises, which makes me your boss, and I will be ripping up your report when it gets to the office".

Everyone standing round gasped."But" said Lobo, "When we worked with Betty, she was always moaning about how poor she was and how you lived in a hovel!"

"I am a secret multimillionaire and I never told Betty" laughed Mr Butterpudding.

[purplecat41877]

For a while, Mrs. Butterpudding stood there in shock. Then she screamed loud enough for the whole town to hear.