It scares me (baring of the soul)

[Nurian]

Tonight I was talking to a friend about the world's problems. I let slip something about myself that I never realized.

Specifically, I said, "If I stood at a console that had one button and that button would wipe out the human race, I'd push it."
I said it almost facetiously...until I thought about it more. And the more I thought, the more I realized how frickin' serious I was.

And that scares me. It scares me to no end. It's not that I'm cruel or evil (I don't think, anyway) or nihilistic or anything like that. I. Just. Hate. People. From the idiots we talk about in this forum to those who propagate war in the name of retaining power. From the idiot old man complaining about how the one who bagged his groceries at the market was black to the ones telling us "God hates you."

I was never like this. I never hated. I used to believe people were inherently good, that they'd look out for what's right. Now? No way. It's like seeing the world through a filter that only let's you see the bad. After all, how can I see divinity in someone who think they're superior to the next person because the other person happens to be a different version of Christian than they are.

I look around and I have to quote from Something Positive:
"The shortest verse in the Bible is 'Jesus wept.' The only thing wrong with it is the past tense."

[Plaidman]

Sad thing is, I feel the same way.

Only in death, are we all equal. Only if every single person dies at the same time, will everyone finally be treated as equals. It's fair. It's true.

It's humanity choice of hurting and hating others for no reasons, other then how people look, or their views, which is sick.

But there are good people out there. People that do look to the person's true worth and not superficial appearences.

[Amina516]

I have to believe in MY ability to be a good person and therefore shape my day and life to how I want and need it to be..otherwise, I wouldnt get out of bed in the mornings. I drive myself to do, everyday, whats right, whats good. But thats a personal choice. And its not due to religion, but to the golden rule. I dont always get that behaviour back, but I behave in a manner that I personally can live with. I can only control myself. Other people I will deal with (or not), but I dont give them the power to dictate how I can live my life.

I dont think youre cruel or evil. I think youre real...and thats fine. However, you should remember that your purpose here is for youself and your wife, and anyone else who you feel is worthy of your friendship. Dont give one schment of time to those are are assholes and generally unworthy.

Pressing that button would mean that all the evil, entitlement whores and bad people in general would be gone...but so would the good people. The innocent children, those who are polite and happy all the time, of sound mind. The people in general that you wake up to and they make you smile from ear to ear. Gotta take the good with the bad, you know?

Also keep in mind that the squeaky wheel gets the grease. We remember all the horrible, yelling people and so often let the nice ones go by unnoticed and unappreciated.

That link was a deep one. Thanks for that.

[NateTheChops]

I understand where you're coming from.

I on the otherhand feel better knowing I can confront the assholes who make my life difficult. Knowing that they can hurl all of the abuse they want at me but that I can do the same to them and they can't stop me.

If they want to kill me to keep me from talking it only proves their own weakness even more.

[TheMike]

I think it would take 'The Doctor' showing up to stop me pushing that one... just to see if it really worked.

[XCashier]

I understand your feelings. Human beings can be stupid, cruel, manipulative, nasty and just plain annoying as hell. We can also be intelligent, kind, caring, decent and sensible. Devil and angel in one package. And sadly, we have to take the bad with the good, or we almost never appreciate the good. Frustrating, yes, that's also part of the package.

"The shortest verse in the Bible is 'Jesus wept.' The only thing wrong with it is the past tense."

This strip, and this storyline, is one of the best I've ever seen. Fred is such an excellent character. Even with Alzheimer's.

[Antisocial_Worker]

I'm writing a novel at the moment that involves a character who's going to have a revelation sort of like yours, Nurian. He's going to have to question every time the issue comes up whether the world is even worth saving.

And I'm going to be putting that character through it because I certainly know where you're coming from. This is a world where a woman who never hurt anyone, my mother, can still die a piece at a time with one sense after another failing or faltering, losing even the ability to take the most simple pleasures out of life. This while vacuous idiots make the news for spending too much money or being caught, yet again, with cocaine in their purse because even with everything they could ever want they're still empty, cold, and cruel inside and nothing makes it stop hurting, ever.

This is a world where you can purchase a child and commit upon that child things that no person, let alone no child, should ever have to think about, let alone commit. And when you're done, you return the child so that someone else can use her in the same fashion. Or him.

This is a world where wars have to be fought to stop an entire nation from grinding up a segment of its population in an industrial death machine, because without the war they'd keep right on doing it and the horror would spread across a continent.

This is, lest I go on and on, a world that on its face does not look to be worth living in or saving from itself had you the power. It's a world where, if you're smart, you'll envy the dead.

Sometimes I know how to get along in a world like this and other times I don't.

[csquared]

Nurian,

Please don't push the button. I am not through trying to improve the world yet.

Better still, give me a hand? I can use all the help I can get.

[emax4]

You don't want to push the button. You're not really thinking of the outcome that it will have. Yeah, no more asshat customers, but look at what you're losing:

1. friends and relatives - they're obliterated because enough sucky customers pushed you over the edge.
2. non sucky customers - I haven't gone to church in a long time, but if you see people working at a fish fry or volunteer event, you'll see how much people can help each other and have a good time doing so. Think about the wonderful (not sarcastic) parents that won't be able to teach their kids to treat others as they would want to be treated
3. workers in general - if the first wave hits the west coast, I'm gonna miss seeing my favorite shows and actors. Although if it hits when my shows aren't on, then it won't be as bad. So your action will cause me to get mad, then I'll be mad at you on the way to heaven or hell.

If you could be selective in who gets wiped out, I have a few bullies from high school I could give you, though.

[Nurian]

Thanks for all the responses, guys. I think I'm going through a very rough patch right now (unemployed for my 7th month, away from my wife) and the conversation came at the wrong time.

I'm no Job, so focusing on faith is a little harder for me. So, for now, I'll focus on the good as much as I can.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Nurian,

Please don't push the button. I am not through trying to improve the world yet.

Pfft, screw trying to IMPROVE it. I just wanna start over from scratch.

I'm sure SOMEONE LEFT OUT THE BAKING SODA and that's why the chemistry is all screwed to hell.

*Pushes button*

......

*CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK*

........it's not plugged in. Well, SNAP. Someone fetch me a Swiss Army knife and some gum, I'm taking over the world.

[emax4]

Don't forget that you're not alone. There are probably lots of other people that would RATHER be in your shoes because their situation is worse.

[csquared]

Don't forget that you're not alone. There are probably lots of other people that would RATHER be in your shoes because their situation is worse.

The timing on this post was interesting, as I read it yesterday. It made me think of 2752 people that would gladly trade places with you.

RWH
*Hides tools, gum and duct tape*

No German Tater salad for you.

[Food Lady]

The timing on this post was interesting, as I read it yesterday. It made me think of 2752 people that would gladly trade places with you.

Well-said. And you just made me cry.

[Android Kaeli]

You know what's even worse? I'd be holding the console for you and asking you on to push the damn button. Heck, begging is a better word.

Like you, I didn't always hate people. Sure there were a few exceptions to that, where isn't there exceptions? But I never hated the entire human population until about two years ago, not like I do now. I can't stand people, I find anyone and everyone to be rude, stupid, or down right mean.

This is why I want to open a sancturary for cats, because I much rather live with cats then live with the human race. If there was such a button, I'd beat you to it and press it myself.