I've just got to dump. I'm at the point where I don't know how much more I can take.
My husband and I both came out of situations where we left our parents' homes with not all of our possessions and anywhere from $50 - $100 each to our names. This was also around the time we started dating. (We were really off on the right foot there, huh?) We ended up going to the same school, we put our student housing on our loans so we'd have a roof over our heads and from a connection I had, we both got jobs at a grocery store.
Long story short, he had an injury at the store where he landed directly on his back. He already had scoliosis, but this did a number on him. The incident report was falsified, he was given a list of clinics that were either out of business or wouldn't take worker's comp cases. We didn't know our rights at the time and were terrified of losing our jobs. After taking it up with management repeatedly, they wouldn't do anything to fix it. He wasn't even SEEN by a doctor. He got NO care whatsoever. We're going to talk to a lawyer now to see if we have any way of pursuing this, but I'm not hopeful. I don't think we have a way of proving what happened, but it's worth asking for an expert opinion.
It turns out right now, we're not doing as well financially as we thought, so what little care he was FINALLY starting to get to address the issues from that work injury has to be put on hold. We have a massive insurance deductible to meet before they'll cover any of it, so I'm an utterly stressed, crying mess today.
Some of you may have seen my depression help thread in Life Advice. I'm going through a book that is helping, not just reading, but good writing exercises to help break things down and heal. Another thing I've found that really helps me is to throw myself into my baking. The financial crunch is putting a stop to a lot of that. Yeah, I'll keep making our breads because that saves us money, but no extra treats. There goes part of my therapy.
I didn't want to talk about why I was depressed before, but I'm starting to come to terms with it now. I came across some court documents about my biological father and to make a long story short, all evidence points to me being raped by my biological father when I was 4. My case was thrown out, and everyone who knew the evidence was shocked. A lot points to corruption and small town politics. Knowing what I said after I came home from visitation that time and what I told the social worker, there aren't many ways to interpret it. A four year old doesn't know what to call it, but it was pretty descriptive.
So yeah, I find this out on my own because nobody thought it was a good idea to tell me. I'm sorting through what this means and putting it in its proper place so I can just keep living. All I want in this is to keep living. I was before I knew, and I've just got to put everything in its proper place so I can continue to do so.
For the record, my biological father is serving an 18 year jail term for doing the same to another little girl. She was 6 when he was caught and it had been going on for 2 years. It gives the past case all the more credibility.
Also, I want the man I love to stop hurting. It's KILLING me to see him hurt. It's draining on him. I take care of him as much as I can and I just want to take it all away. I'd rather be the one hurting.
I don't expect solutions to any of this from the forum, but thoughts and prayers would be very much appreciated.
My husband and I both came out of situations where we left our parents' homes with not all of our possessions and anywhere from $50 - $100 each to our names. This was also around the time we started dating. (We were really off on the right foot there, huh?) We ended up going to the same school, we put our student housing on our loans so we'd have a roof over our heads and from a connection I had, we both got jobs at a grocery store.
Long story short, he had an injury at the store where he landed directly on his back. He already had scoliosis, but this did a number on him. The incident report was falsified, he was given a list of clinics that were either out of business or wouldn't take worker's comp cases. We didn't know our rights at the time and were terrified of losing our jobs. After taking it up with management repeatedly, they wouldn't do anything to fix it. He wasn't even SEEN by a doctor. He got NO care whatsoever. We're going to talk to a lawyer now to see if we have any way of pursuing this, but I'm not hopeful. I don't think we have a way of proving what happened, but it's worth asking for an expert opinion.
It turns out right now, we're not doing as well financially as we thought, so what little care he was FINALLY starting to get to address the issues from that work injury has to be put on hold. We have a massive insurance deductible to meet before they'll cover any of it, so I'm an utterly stressed, crying mess today.
Some of you may have seen my depression help thread in Life Advice. I'm going through a book that is helping, not just reading, but good writing exercises to help break things down and heal. Another thing I've found that really helps me is to throw myself into my baking. The financial crunch is putting a stop to a lot of that. Yeah, I'll keep making our breads because that saves us money, but no extra treats. There goes part of my therapy.
I didn't want to talk about why I was depressed before, but I'm starting to come to terms with it now. I came across some court documents about my biological father and to make a long story short, all evidence points to me being raped by my biological father when I was 4. My case was thrown out, and everyone who knew the evidence was shocked. A lot points to corruption and small town politics. Knowing what I said after I came home from visitation that time and what I told the social worker, there aren't many ways to interpret it. A four year old doesn't know what to call it, but it was pretty descriptive.
So yeah, I find this out on my own because nobody thought it was a good idea to tell me. I'm sorting through what this means and putting it in its proper place so I can just keep living. All I want in this is to keep living. I was before I knew, and I've just got to put everything in its proper place so I can continue to do so.
For the record, my biological father is serving an 18 year jail term for doing the same to another little girl. She was 6 when he was caught and it had been going on for 2 years. It gives the past case all the more credibility.
Also, I want the man I love to stop hurting. It's KILLING me to see him hurt. It's draining on him. I take care of him as much as I can and I just want to take it all away. I'd rather be the one hurting.
I don't expect solutions to any of this from the forum, but thoughts and prayers would be very much appreciated.
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