Dear Mrs. Snarky Caller,
I'm sorry you're getting phone calls for an apartment rental that you don't have. I really am. I'm sorry your husband is a recovering cancer patient (well, I'm not sorry he's recovering, just sorry he has cancer). I'm sorry that the same woman keeps calling you over and over for the apartment that you don't have.
Do you think you might have been just a little, tiny bit more helpful in your voicemail rant, though? It really is irrelevant that you live on Road With Pretentious Name (goody for you). It's even more irrelevant that "this is a historic home!" (like those never get rented out), as the callers have no way of knowing that, nor do they care (neither do I). I don't even need the name of the lady who persists in calling you, although I do wonder why she keeps giving you her name. Perhaps she's hoping you'll change your mind and rent her your OMG historic home!
What I really do need, and what you did not supply, is your phone number. You know, the one that keeps appearing in the ad, prompting Confused Lady Caller to dial your number yet again looking for that apartment. Without that phone number, I have no way to track down the incorrect ad and thus "Cut it OUT!" as you snapped in your message. So until you supply the one piece of important information you possess, I guess you're going to keep getting calls until, as you put it, you "pop your cork." Sorry about that.
Sincerely, MoonCat
I'm sorry you're getting phone calls for an apartment rental that you don't have. I really am. I'm sorry your husband is a recovering cancer patient (well, I'm not sorry he's recovering, just sorry he has cancer). I'm sorry that the same woman keeps calling you over and over for the apartment that you don't have.
Do you think you might have been just a little, tiny bit more helpful in your voicemail rant, though? It really is irrelevant that you live on Road With Pretentious Name (goody for you). It's even more irrelevant that "this is a historic home!" (like those never get rented out), as the callers have no way of knowing that, nor do they care (neither do I). I don't even need the name of the lady who persists in calling you, although I do wonder why she keeps giving you her name. Perhaps she's hoping you'll change your mind and rent her your OMG historic home!
What I really do need, and what you did not supply, is your phone number. You know, the one that keeps appearing in the ad, prompting Confused Lady Caller to dial your number yet again looking for that apartment. Without that phone number, I have no way to track down the incorrect ad and thus "Cut it OUT!" as you snapped in your message. So until you supply the one piece of important information you possess, I guess you're going to keep getting calls until, as you put it, you "pop your cork." Sorry about that.
Sincerely, MoonCat
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