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Got in Trouble 2 days ago at work (aspie conversing with a latino girl)

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  • #46
    Quoth kibbles View Post
    If there is no history of sleaze or smarmy and the hitting on the person has stopped, to say that someone simply speaking to you at all is threatening doesn't make any sense IMO.
    Maybe not threatening, but it can be unwelcome and difficult to deal with. One job I had, I was doing work which required concentration. This one guy kept coming up to me and talking to me, breaking my concentration. I'd give him brief responses, tell him I was trying to work. He just. wouldn't. stop.

    Eventually, I'd had it. I stood up, pointed to the door, and in a voice which I'm told was heard on the other side of the building, told him "WE ARE TRYING TO WORK HERE. GO AWAY."

    .... somehow, this turned into me harassing and hassling him, and he was terrified of me. Fortunately, everyone in the office heard exactly what I'd said to him, and had seen him refusing to take 'we're busy' for an answer.

    Anyway, just trying to say that unwanted 'simple conversation' can be a problem. Not a threat, but a problem.
    Seshat's self-help guide:
    1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
    2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
    3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
    4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

    "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

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    • #47
      But IMO what you described wasn't just a simple conversation, he was interrupting your work and after you told him you were working he wouldn't stop.

      My point was that even if someone is turned down for a date, they shouldn't have to go around wondering if it is ok to talk to the other person. I don't mean constantly bothering the other person but again I was referring to the simple conversation that Broomjockey talked of.

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      • #48
        its not so simple conversation, sometimes I can't help to think that men want to sleep woth me, that's all. I have a fear of men, nothing I can do.

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        • #49
          I think we'll just have to agree to disagree 'cause every man talking to a woman doesn't mean he wants to sleep with her, just like every woman talking to a man doesn't mean she wants to sleep with him.

          JMO of course.

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          • #50
            I really think this thread has run its course.

            I don't know how much more can be added to the discussion.

            I'm closing it.
            Too tired of living and too tired to end it. What a conundrum.

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