Mother Earth is trying to Kill me

[Sliceanddice]

im so klumsy, its not funny. I break things by looking at them wrong.
Earlier this week my ankle turned when i was standing still and i feel and scrapped up my arm, almost fell on my dog, and almost hit my head on a car.

all week ive been wearing different shoes thant usual (no heals at all, flip flops and sneakers) i walk down the lane to the restroom. say high to coworker whos namei dont know.

there goes my ankel
Here comes the ground
and her comes the pain through my chest, arm and ankle as i land square on my arm and chest.

Im suddenly surrounded by women from the bridge, and a little skinny blonde chick who i cant really believe can help me get up off the ground, helps me off the ground.
The earth is trying to kill and its attacking my at work.

[Gravekeeper]

Mother Earth isn't trying to murder you, silly.

Gravity is.

[Sliceanddice]

ive fallen down cliffs, had trees take swipes at me, theres this whole issue with a boat and the ocean, i lost about 6 inches of skin in a river once, i cant go camping with out injury, oh and the flying rocks, i hate the flying rocks.

Gravity is just Mother Earths bitch help along until Mama wants to 'go for a ride"

oh and the earth tired to swallow me whole once.
yeah im all kinds of special.