Silly String, fisticuffs, stupid customers, things and other assorted suck

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

So this weekend kicks off our biggest sale until Black Friday and it was totally nucking futs. We were planned to do $50,000 worth of sales yesterday and ended up doing $75,000 instead. I was supposed to just be pulling and filling merchandise all day and maybe spent about 45 minutes out of the entire day doing that.

Not a Good Sign 15 minutes into your shift
Customer: Can you help me?
Me: Sure, what do you need?
C: Well, I'm looking for this thing--I forget what it's called--but it's this thing, and it's kinda long, and it has this thing you connect it to the wall with...
Me:

Hey Big Spender (or Free Hernias! Inquire Within!
Had a customer purchase 20 6-foot long, folding, plastic-top tables at $35 each. They come in boxes of 6. This would not be such a big deal if we took the tables out of the boxes, but for some reason like the customer gets off on pain and human suffering the customer insisted the tables stay in their boxes.

The boxes of 6 tables each weigh over 200 pounds.. Store manager rounded up myself, another manager, and CBFH to help him lift the boxes into the customer's truck.

CBFH then disappeared, saying he was behind on carryouts. He never came back to help (we ended up waiting about 15 minutes for the customer to pull up because she was paying with a fistful of gift cards). Bastard.

Hey Big Spender: Part Deux
Had another customer purchase about $1200 worth of various bedding items like sheet set, comforters, mattress pads, and blankets. She was opening up an elderly care home in a nearby town. I understand it took her about 30 minutes to load up her Blazer with her purchases, which were floor-to-ceiling from the back to her seat, and she had to carry a couple things on her lap. I can't see how that would make for safe driving.

The public schools have way too many half-days
While waiting for the customer with the 20 tables, the managers were discussing and incident that occurred Wednesday. The public schools in town had a half day so all the no-goodniks from the nearby junior high came by to hang out and cause trouble. A group of kids got into a fistfight in the store, requiring a call to the po-po. Some other kids decided to entertain themselves by covering the front doors in silly string and shaving cream. I pity the poor soul who had to clean that up.

CBFH being...well, CBFH
Lamentably, CBFH was scheduled to do carryouts and carts all day, which meant I ended up doing carryouts and carts instead, because as usual CBFH was moving as fast as a terminally depressed glacier. Other people working on the salesfloor had to pitch in on carryouts as well.

I finally went on my half hour break around 3, left the store to get some grub, and came back to find the service desk was paging the break room trying to get a hold of me. Seems they asked CBFH to bring in carts and he blew them off. Thanks, asshole It's pretty damn sad when I can't even eat in peace because somebody's trying to get a hold of me.

Oh half-assedly assembled Tannenbaum, oh half-assedly assembled Tannenbaum...
Tried to resume pulling and filling after lunch, but got called away by the seasonal specialist who required my height to help her get the display Christmas trees lit up. Seems the guys who put them together just slapped them together and didn't bother to plug everything in correctly, so only the very bottom of the tree would light, or the middle, or the top. Not good. Ate up another 45 minutes of my time.

Am I the only one in my store who prefers doing a little work now to doing a lot of work later? We had to take the damn trees apart just to locate the plugs and get everything connected.

So yesterday ended up being one of those days where I ran my ass off and accomplished next to nothing. Just like today. Thank God I have tomorrow off.

[Der Cute]

Tequila, Whisky or Rum?

IPF, Hugs. Wanna help me pack ?

Cute

[Zombi]

I finally went on my half hour break around 3, left the store to get some grub, and came back to find the service desk was paging the break room trying to get a hold of me. Seems they asked CBFH to bring in carts and he blew them off. Thanks, asshole It's pretty damn sad when I can't even eat in peace because somebody's trying to get a hold of me.

Ooh, I hate that. It usually happens when I'm on a late shift - apparently nobody is capable of telling a customer that 'she's having her break now, she'll be back soon.' I refuse to go back up now until I've finished my break, because I know I won't get to finish later, and I put the sign that says 'this department is unattended for the evening' out. There's not enough work to justify having two people on the late, and we don't have enough staff to do it anyway.

[Rapscallion]

Hey Big Spender: Part Deux
Had another customer purchase about $1200 worth of various bedding items like sheet set, comforters, mattress pads, and blankets. She was opening up an elderly care home in a nearby town. I understand it took her about 30 minutes to load up her Blazer with her purchases, which were floor-to-ceiling from the back to her seat, and she had to carry a couple things on her lap. I can't see how that would make for safe driving.

Oh, I don't know. Built-in airbag!

Rapscallion

[Becks]

The public schools in town had a half day so all the no-goodniks from the nearby junior high came by to hang out and cause trouble. A group of kids got into a fistfight in the store, requiring a call to the po-po. Some other kids decided to entertain themselves by covering the front doors in silly string and shaving cream. I pity the poor soul who had to clean that up.

And that is why so many stores have limits as to how many children can come into stores as a group.

Damn, I haven't heard po-po said in a while. I used to say it all the time.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Damn, I haven't heard po-po said in a while. I used to say it all the time.

I ended up with a mental image of Aunt Madea storming up to those kids and hollering "I know Whoop-Yur-Azz."

As for CBFH moving like a terminally depressed glacier, is that slower or faster than a turtle on Valium?

Oh, and can I get a carryout for 10 gas grills, 12 round patio tables, 12 umbrellas and 48 matching chairs? And can fit all of that in my little Toyota?

*ducks and runs*

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

As for CBFH moving like a terminally depressed glacier, is that slower or faster than a turtle on Valium?

It's about as fast as an AMC Gremlin running on 3 cylinders, with 4 flat tires, carrying a load of cement.

Oh, and can I get a carryout for 10 gas grills, 12 round patio tables, 12 umbrellas and 48 matching chairs? And can fit all of that in my little Toyota?

Oh baby, if only I were allowed to charge that $20 improper vehicle fee per item I keep joking about...

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Bump because evidently the kids running amok in the store were even worse than I had imagined.

LP called a store huddle today to tell us the public schools had another half day today and they needed as many people on the salesfloor as possible. They didn't want anybody taking any breaks between 12:00 and 2:00 or so.

In addition to the silly string and shaving cream shenanigans and fights I mentioned, kids were stealing stuff left and right and throwing merchandise. Yes, throwing merchandise. And running up and down the aisles and bumping into shoppers.

People were actually fearing for their safety and leaving the store. One person wrote a letter to corporate demanding we start banning those kids during school hours. Another person (or possibly the same person) wrote another letter to the school district complaining that the public schools have too many half days.

LP at store level and district level have been talking to the company legal department, to see if they can ban schoolchildren from the store during store hours, or at least placing limits on the number of them who can be in the store at the same time.

And go figure, today actually was pretty quiet.