Practical jokes!

[mymaskofsanity]

Back when I worked at a clothing store in a large mall, next to large department store we used to haze the newbies.

It would normally start off with a manager (seemingly) having trouble fixing a shelf for t-shirts.
Said manager would then mention to an associate to go in the back and grab the "shelf adjsuter".

This would be done in view of the newbie.

After the associate has "searched" high and low for the fabled "shelf adjuster" he comes from the back to proclaim it has been lost again.

Manager would then send the newbie over to the Department store next door with some money( it was a Sears ) and tell them to go to the tools section and find a shelf adjuster.

Of course they would be unsuccessful in locating this mythical tool that adjust shelves.
So they would ask for help I supposed...
I could only imagine the looks on the customer services person face in sears when informed the associate needed this " shelf adjuster ".

It worked so well on newbies since they never wanted to come back admitting defeat at not being able to find a "shelf adjuster. Who wants to not be successful at such a seemingly simple task that the manager and associate seem to have handled multiple times.

If I had a nickel for every "f*ck you guys" and disgruntled face we saw walk back into the store I'd be rich.

One kind of ditzy girl we sent was gone for close to 40 minutes one time we did this, we had to send someone to find her and tell her the joke.

LOL


Oh, one more, quick one.

Had an old manager notorius for spending 20 minutes or more in the bathroom "takin' the browns to the superbowl".
We had a pack of ladyfingers in the desk begging to be set off for months.
I let him go in, get comfortable.....
Then lit the little devils and kicked 'em under the door.
BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG !
That was the day I found out my manager shrieked like a woman.
When he finally came out he said he was glad to have been already sitting on the toilet.

[Jester]

I forgot about the girl at the brewpub and her evilness with the newbies.

Now, the girl in question was the Devil Incarnate (DI) disguised as a petite blonde with a very sweet demeanor and little girlie voice....but she was pure evil. (Okay, she was actually a very nice girl, but when it came to pranks, she was Pure Evil.)

This is what she would do to newbies: she would go up to them with a plate of cookies, and very sweetly offer them some of the cookies. And the newbies would invariably take the little frosted chocolate cookies, pop them in their mouths......and then discover just how evil DI was.

See, the "cookies" were actually dried cappucino grounds, removed from the paper packets, and the "frosting" was just foamed milk on top of them. They looked amazingly like cookies, and everyone fell for this, and got to pop a big chunk of coffee grounds into their mouth. Yuck!

The only reason I did not get nailed by DI was that my very first day at the brewpub, I was sicker than a dog, and couldn't even keep GATORADE down, so politely (and initially, to my regret) turned down the cookie. And then I saw what happened with the cookies when she nailed another newbie.

I can't remember ever being so happy that I was sick before!

[Geek King]

Manager would then send the newbie over to the Department store next door with some money( it was a Sears ) and tell them to go to the tools section and find a shelf adjuster.

Were I in the position, I would go have a nice little break at Sears, and come back with the biggest sledge hammer I could buy with the money.

I'm also the onery cuss who in scouts brought back a bucket of water as a "rope stretcher". When taken on a snipe hunt, I brought back my burlap sack with something obviously in it. The older scouts were shocked (as the point of the prank is that snipe don't exist, at least not near us if they do), and finally opened the sack...


















...to be face to face with a very angry feral barn cat!

[Javarod]

Pranks, they're always fun except when done to you. Lets see, back when I worked for RGIS I had a manager that kept losing the transmit machine. See, what they did was one machine collected the inventory data on the spot, then they took it in the back and sent it to the computer, this avoided the delays of all the clerks running into the back to transmit periodically, a big problem with large stores. With his habit of losing it, I swore that for Christmas I was going to buy one of those keychains with a remote for finding your keys, but wound up quitting before then.

As to pranks, I worked with a girl that back when she was a front end manager for Albertson's, she used to tell the newbies to go down to the basement and get a case of light tubes.
When I worked at Papa John's, the standard prank was to tear a whole in the dough you were stretching, then send a newbie to the walk in box for the dough repair kit (you can fix the dough by just pressing it back together). My trick was different, we had a newbie doing a half sausage, half pepperoni pie. Going by, I did my best panic impression, and told him he had the sausage and the pepperoni on the wrong sides.

[DarthRetard]

At work, we like to insert random names of our higher ups or products in place of randomly selected words in conversation.

Ex:

"Can I help you find Anator today?"

"Welcome to GiNoC (GNC)"

[BookstoreEscapee]

One of the guys (C) in my office loves doing pranks. Usually he gets one of the other guys (P), but no one is truly safe. He started with just putting P's desk chair all the way down one morning. The next day it was all the way up. One day a couple weeks ago P came in and his chair was upside down (though D did that one).

P had a bunch of harmonicas that came with a book but the book was missing, and he had just set them aside. So one day C built "Harmonica-henge" on his desk.

C has an advantage because he comes in before 7 and P doesn't get in until 8. But P gets creative sometimes in the afternoon after C leaves..as in the next story...P was just wandering around looking for inspiration...we were the only ones left in the office so I helped.

We have lots of toys around the office (some are merchandise, some are just ours). They often end up in, lets say, "compromising" positions. Recently C came in to a sock monkey doll spanking another monkey in his chair, with Webkinz bulldogs and leopards all around his cube "watching"... (I helped P with that one). And the same day, the girl in the cube across from C had left her coffee cup half full on her desk, so we had another monkey doll "drinking" her coffee from the stirrer straws. We did this on a Friday afternoon, so they sat there all weekend. I wonder what the cleaning people thought when they came to get the trash...

[Shabo]

Microsoft has a nifty screen saver that simulates a blue screen of death, then reboot. The BSOD has a different message every time, and the only way to get out of the screen saver is to hit a key on the keyboard. It's pretty neat, because if you have an XP machine, it shows the XP splash screen (the one with the windows logo) when "rebooting" and same thing for 2000. Anyway, I had set all the computers in one part of the office to have this particular screen saver, then forgot about it. I get a frantic call one day while I'm out on a ticket. It's my coworkers going, "What's wrong with the computers!!!!"

I was like, What are you talking about? *light dawns* Oh yeah!