Things I am not allowed to do at work.

[Becks]

And my watering wand is not my pimp cane.

Shows what they know.

[edible_hat]

I am allowed to make a rubber band ball

Scratch that, it seems some of my coworkers can't figure out how to take the rubber bands off the ball. On that note, I'm not allowed to confuse the drag shift guys.

[jedimaster91]

Sacrifices and burnt offerings to the Microsoft demons are frowned upon by management and not guarenteed to get the computers working.

[HorrorFrogPrincess]

-I am not allowed to take bribes in exchange for claiming someone came back from lunch on time if they were actually a few minutes late.

-Even if the bribe is fried food.

[fireheart]

-I am not allowed to take bribes in exchange for claiming someone came back from lunch on time if they were actually a few minutes late.

-Even if the bribe is fried food.

So not even cream puffs?

[HorrorFrogPrincess]

Not even FRENCH FRIES! That, my friend, is a travesty.

I take them, anyway, of course. ^^ The things I do for fried potato wedges...

[Boggles]

I am not allowed to erect a fairground style sign near the door saying "Your pants must be pulled at least this high to shop here."

[Mr. Rude]

Rules broken this week from original post.....

8,13,14,15,22,24,25,27,34,41,45,51,62,63(x15),64(x 20),68,72(x3),92,98,&99

as far as I can recall...

[fireheart]

From today...

-For the 1,349,837,698th time, NO FLIRTING WITH THE NIGHTFILLERS!
-Especially the one you have your eye on.
-My coworker is not the spawn of satan.
-I am not to ask for a priest to exorcise the broken EAS gate.
-Because the gate is broken, not possessed.
-I am also not to state that it is possessed by Satan.
-Nor by Beelzebub, Lucifer or any other name for The Devil.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Should I discover one of the baby grackles/starlings/loud, annoying, stupid ugly black birds that got in the backroom, flew around aimlessly while squawking incessantly and probably died from starvation/dehydration, not allowed to use the corpse in a recreation of Monty Python's "Dead Parrot" sketch.

[edible_hat]

When I get my hands covered in grease (happens more often than you'd think), I am not allowed to perform the "White and Black Minstrel show".

(Not that I would anyway, because although it might be funny it would definitely be very racist.)

[JoitheArtist]

Should I discover one of the baby grackles/starlings/load, annoying, stupid ugly black birds that got in the backroom, flew around aimlessly while squawking incessantly and probably died from starvation/dehydration, not allowed to use the corpse in a recreation of Monty Python's "Dead Parrot" sketch.

Oh, I would have paid good money to see that!

Well...I don't have good money...I would've given you the couple of crumpled dollar bills in the bottom of my purse, though.

[fireheart]

-Just because I am good with putting away excess stock (20 minutes to do one trolley ) I am not to call myself any of the following:

The Stockmaster.
Stock Queen.
The Stockinator.
The Smoothinator. (points for the reference)
Stockess
Queen of The Stock

[anyanka2]

-Put a nonfunctioning phone in the women's bathroom aka the other office so one supervisor can get it in the couple hours she spends there.

-Tell same supervisor that there's a unicorn on the back dock.

-Mess with said supervisor's collection of pills.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

When I'm doing a price check for the older-than-dirt, can't-really-do-her-job-correctly-anymore cashier, and she goes over the PA and says "Irv, forget about bringing that vacuum cleaner up, she doesn't want it," not allowed to go on the PA and say "Okay!"

I did that today. I got a pretty stern talking-to from the store manager.