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Things I am not allowed to do at work.

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  • Quoth dawnfire View Post
    how about vampires
    Maybe

    -----

    I'm not allowed to take a selfie with the nuclear camera.
    This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

    I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

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    • Nuclear camera?
      "Crazy may always be open for business, but on the full moon, it has buy one get one free specials." - WishfulSpirit

      "Sometimes customers remind me of zombies, but I'm pretty sure that zombies are smarter." - MelindaJoy77

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      • I'm not allowed to sing Tim Minchin at work.
        No singing Avenue Q at work.

        (keep in mind, I work with CHILDREN)
        The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

        Now queen of USSR-Land...

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        • Steve (the sheep) is not cold and does not need to show his team pride so I should stop dressing him.

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          • If I'm working on a clergy's computer, I'm not allowed to download SATAN.
            "I'm just trying to protect your computer. Honest!"

            I'm not allowed to say to the network administrator, "You must be spying on me, because I can see you sniffing my packets."
            This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

            I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

            Comment


            • Quoth Seanette View Post
              Nuclear camera?
              I'm guessing a device that captures images based on a certain band of radiation?

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              • Quoth Seanette View Post
                Nuclear camera?
                It's also known as a Gamma Camera, though the hospital I work for doesn't call it that.

                Actually, Sapphire Silk could explain it better than I could since she's a medical worker and I'm a non-medical worker.
                This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                Comment


                • Yep, had one of them used on me once. Was kind of disappointed I didn't glow in the dark after being injected with radioisotopes...

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                  • I am not allowed to hum the Jeopardy tune while I'm waiting for a customer to figure out how to use the debit card reader or while I'm waiting for them to fish the exact change out of their purses or pockets.
                    Sometimes customers remind me of zombies, but I'm pretty sure that zombies are smarter.

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                    • When I'm servicing a computer at the switchboard, I'm not allowed to pick up the phone and whine, "Quit calling me."
                      This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                      I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                      Comment


                      • When I see a patient come into the Emergency Room with a police escort, I am not allowed to play the theme to Dragnet (Danger Ahead) on my phone.
                        This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                        I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                        Comment


                        • Not allowed to mark all the really ugly curtains down to $2.00 a package.
                          Not allowed to borrow showroom fabric samples from larger stores with more of them and " forget" to send them back.
                          Not allowed to throw entire drawer of track components at next customer who fails to grasp the concept that there is more than one type of curtain track, and more than one company making them- therefore, more than one type of component. No, there is no one universal bracket, end stop, or glide that will work in any kind of track ever made anywhere. XP
                          Is it Asshole Day or what? - MoonCat
                          It's ALWAYS Asshole Day. - Jay2KWinger

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                          • Not allowed to stick a pacifier in the Ass Man's mouth next time he whines about any of the following:

                            Not feeling well

                            Wants to go home

                            Making out the weekly schedule for the Grocery department and has a zillion requests off from employees for the weekend (next weekend is Big U's Homecoming and half our employees want off.)

                            Broke all the time (quit hoarding your money and just put a little bit away at a time instead of half your checks every 2 weeks and you might have a little bit more to live on, but I digress)

                            Frankly I think this one needs a GF. Any volunteers?
                            Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                            • Apparently not allowed to ignore a 'problem' that could easily be solved by the customer just paying attention to what they're doing (and typically does solve itself within 30 seconds when they figure it out).

                              Not allowed to post signs saying that any discounts not showing up immediately will show up at the END of the transaction (supposedly it's 'unprofessional'...).
                              "I am quite confident that I do exist."
                              "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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                              • When a server is not sliding in the rack easily, I am not allowed to yell, "GET IN THERE" Scorpion style.
                                This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                                I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                                Comment

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