Stupid job titles!

[Solumina]

I am an “Activities Coordinator” who hands out put-putt equipment, chases geese, and sometimes folds towels. At least my title sounds better when people ask what I do so I don’t have to explain myself to the elitists that I grew up with as well as the ones that I am related to.

[Zellie Crescent]

At A & P I'm known as a "Seafood server" at Wii got it I'm known as Terry's sister, cousin, daughter, neighbor, whatever.

[dalesys]

At A & P I'm known as a "Seafood server" at Wii got it I'm known as Terry's sister, cousin, daughter, neighbor, whatever.

As long as you don't get called "The Terry heir!"

[Lace Neil Singer]

At the pet shop I used to work at, I was labeled "Pet Section Manager". Doesn't sound stupid... til you factor in the small fact that I was the only person in the entire section. -.- Only time I got to be managerial was on the weekend, when the weekend girls were there.

[EricKei]

At GameStop, the lower levels were "Game Advisor" and "Senior Game Advisor" (read: low-level keyholder)

I haven't seen fancy titles any other place I've worked, tho I think my official title here is "Internet Business Development Specialist" -- At least, according to the Job Offer ads my boss has been putting out for the past few months >_> The odd thing is, it's been over a year before my job regularly had anything to do with our websites...

I may have to steal CS Ninjas, as well, for when I finally get my own business off the ground...

top to bottom:

grand poobah (owner/ceo)
chief muckymuck (pres/vp)
stormtrooper (HR)
enforcer (LP)
samurai (SM)
gunny (ASM)
ninja (experienced CS worker)
padawan (newbie cs worker)

[fireheart]

I may have to steal CS Ninjas, as well, for when I finally get my own business off the ground...

top to bottom:

grand poobah (owner/ceo)
chief muckymuck (pres/vp)
stormtrooper (HR)
enforcer (LP)
samurai (SM)
gunny (ASM)
ninja (experienced CS worker)
padawan (newbie cs worker)

Sounds like something out of Habbo Hotel.

[searssoulslave]

Out of all the titles I've ever recieved working at KFC my name badge stated that I was a "Chicken Genius" My mother to this day will not let me live it down.

[BrenDAnn]

I feel somehow boring now. I'm just a clerk, and part-time kitchen worker, at the c-store. Our management just has the usual titles. From store level on up:

2nd AM
Assistant Manager
Manager
Area Supervisor
District Manager
Regional Supervisor

And on up, until you reach Mr. President & CEO at corporate. Yeah, pretty normal, I know. Heh...I wonder what the manager would say if I started calling myself a customer service ninja? I'd love to see the look on her face!

[mattm04]

It's not just people. But product. Those bag like tings this you put in trash cans are actually "refuse can liners", or if clear "natural refuse can liners"

[Pagan]

I was a "Fashion Consultant" when I worked at the Victoria's Secret call center.

Train drivers in Yankee land are called "Engineer" for obscure historical reasons.

'Cause they actually used to be engineers.

A company called Bonobos has Customer Service Ninjas.

At one job, I was not a professor, teacher, or instructor but a facilitator.

I wanna be a customer service ninja.

*steals idea for later use*

When I used to work a Hasting's, several of the guys I worked with had "ninja" titles for themselves. I miss those guys!

I may have to steal CS Ninjas, as well, for when I finally get my own business off the ground...

top to bottom:

grand poobah (owner/ceo)
chief muckymuck (pres/vp)
stormtrooper (HR)
enforcer (LP)
samurai (SM)
gunny (ASM)
ninja (experienced CS worker)
padawan (newbie cs worker)

Dude, do you need a drug dealer? (I'm a Certified Pharm Tech, but I like to call myself a drug dealer.)

Out of all the titles I've ever recieved working at KFC my name badge stated that I was a "Chicken Genius" My mother to this day will not let me live it down.

Too. Many. Jokes. *BLAM* brain explodes. Oooh, that's an Excedrin headache, right there.

[mikoyan29]

I'm a quality engineer. When I worked at Kroger I was a clerk-cashier. No title inflation for me....

I worked at one company where we didn't have any titles because someone read a book that flat organizations work better. Um...yeah. We still had people that had job functions.

I think my favorite modern management theory is the upside down pyramid. The president at the bottom and everyone else above him....Uh yeah...we believe that one.

[EricKei]

Dude, do you need a drug dealer? (I'm a Certified Pharm Tech, but I like to call myself a drug dealer.)

Sure! We can always use one o' those! We might also hire someone who gets ...meds...for the customers, too!

[draftermatt]

grand poobah (owner/ceo)

That's hilarious.

Our store newsletters come from "Grand Poobah, aka Big Daddy aka The Chief or Store Manger ---"

People actually refer to him as "Big Daddy" on the sales floor too.

I just call him "boss", he seems to like that.

[Flying Grype]

I used to work for a company whose store staff all had 'experience' in their titles -- Customer Experience Representatives were the lowest of the low. I can't stand the word 'experience' in that context. I am not in your store for an experience, I am there to buy a fracking book. It's not a spa or a resort or a river-rafting camp.

[mikoyan29]

I used to work for a company whose store staff all had 'experience' in their titles -- Customer Experience Representatives were the lowest of the low. I can't stand the word 'experience' in that context. I am not in your store for an experience, I am there to buy a fracking book. It's not a spa or a resort or a river-rafting camp.

That sounds like some more of that modern MBA newspeak. They aren't customers, they are guests. They aren't employees, they are team members or associates. They aren't managers or supervisors, they are team leaders or coordinators.