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"It's like dying but without the pain. Or the eternity. Or the flames or the harps or the...okay, so it's not like dying except that it is."
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"The things that I remember best - those are the things I wasn't supposed to do…."
I'm coming back as a Schooner Wharf Bar dog. -
"What's a demi-john? Is it anything like long johns?"
RapscallionComment
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"Does anyone want to lick my eyeball?"The report button - not just for decoration
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"We seem to have a fundamental ... thing going on here."
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"Is fashion hell different from normal hell?"
"Yes. You wear paisley.""The things that I remember best - those are the things I wasn't supposed to do…."
I'm coming back as a Schooner Wharf Bar dog.Comment
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JD: i am going to stab mother nature.
me: gettin' all stabby, eh?
JD: no, stabbity.
JS: instead of my childhood being raped, it was only mildly molested.Kim: She's got one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel.
I'd like to exercise my constitutional right to not give a fuck.Comment
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"Hungarian Embassy! How may I mis-direct your call today?"
B"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."- Albert Einstein.
I never knew how happy paint could make people until I started selling it.Comment
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Its not hard enoughComment
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My arm is retarded. It's like, it can't do anything."Oh, you hate your job? There's a club for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet down at the bar." ~Drew CareyComment
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We need Jake's Johnson up here....I mean Jake John....shit....nevermind.I guess they shouldn't have set their phasers to miss-Mike NelsonComment
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"Why is this so big?"I guess they shouldn't have set their phasers to miss-Mike NelsonComment
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*Said in thick Nove Scoatian accent*
"Oooh, I was yelling out your name!"I pray for the strength to change what I can, the inability to change what I can't, and the incapacity to tell the difference -Calvin, Calvin & Hobbes
Being a pessimist and cynical wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't right so often!
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"I just got my back waxed...boy did that hurt! They got all the ass hairs, too. I'm clean as a whistle!"
I will not shove “it” up my backside. I do not know what “it” is, but in my many years on this earth I have figured out that that particular port hole is best reserved for emergency exit only. -GKComment
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"You'd think as many people as I sleep with around here, I'd have more money than this.""Maybe the problem just went away...maybe it was the magical sniper fairy that comes and gives silenced hollow point rounds to people who don't eat their vegetables."Comment
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