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"I didn't wake up this morning expecting to be wandering around the gents' toilets with a ruler, but here I am."
Rapscallion
Rapscallion
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"Yeah boy, get some, get some!"Comment
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Supervisor to Bossman:
"The water was boiling, you ass!""For the love of all that is holy and 4 things that aren’t but feel pretty good anyway" ~ GravekeeperComment
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"It's also because I'm just so damn sexy"
"You keep thinking that"
"I couldn't find the pole!"
"No wonder you're single"Comment
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"I'm pleased to see that you take child labour seriously and try to get the best value you can out of them."
RapscallionComment
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"Then we'll just offer you up as a sacrifice to the retail gods and see what happens.""Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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Nice of you to compare my coworker to a sick child molester.
My desire for intelligence clashes with idiocy. More than once I've come close to throttling a level 1 tech for inflicting their stupid on me.Coworker: Distro of choice?
Me: Gentoo.
Coworker: Ahh. A Masochist. I thought so.Comment
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"I should have licked his muffin"Comment
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I'll be a witness!!!!
.......... What am I witnessing?SC: “Yeah, Bob’s Company. I'm Bob. It's my company.” - GK
SuperHotelWorker made my Avi!!Comment
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"I've got a problem right now that money can't solve."
"Then in that case, it sounds like you're suffering from SRH. Do you know what that is?"
"No."
"Sperm Retention Headache. You need to get laid."
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"What? Paul gave you crabs?"Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)
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"At first I thought those were two people riding a giant lizard, and then I thought, 'What does that have to do with Brazil?'"Comment
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"My former foreign exchange student is back here for a couple weeks this summer. I don't think the 4th of July is such a big holiday over there.""I look at the stars. It's a clear night and the Milky Way seems so near. That's where I'll be going soon. "We are all star stuff." I suddenly remember Delenn's line from Joe's script. Not a bad prospect. I am not afraid. In the meantime, let me close my eyes and sense the beauty around me. And take that breath under the dark sky full of stars. Breathe in. Breathe out. That's all."
-Mira FurlanComment
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Network admin: "Quit molesting the file!"
Jason: "Besides. It wasn't me who killed access to all servers. Jason did it!"
Coworker: "It's easier to pin blame when both network admins are named Jason!"
Jason2: "I did not. I only killed access to internal systems!"
Jason: "Oh, right...that was me. heheh."
Coworker: You're the one who made that noose out of ethernet!
Coworker2: I could fit under it.
Coworker: Damned midget.Coworker: Distro of choice?
Me: Gentoo.
Coworker: Ahh. A Masochist. I thought so.Comment
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Me: "So yeah, applying to be Change Center Hostess."
Sup: "There are doctors that can do that, you know."
Me: "Huh?"
Sup: "You said hostess. *snickers*"
Me:
"HOST."
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Me (installing a server in a rack): ::falls over and looses grip on server::
Server: "THUD"
Me: "Shit!"
Admin: "Are you OK!?"
Me: "Yeah... im allri..."
Admin (interrupting): "Not you. I was taking to that DELL you just dropped."Comment
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