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Something to tell my grandchildren

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  • Something to tell my grandchildren

    Yesterday, a regular customer came in. I've talked about this guy before. He is a professional wrestler. He wrestled in the WWF/WWE, and is now in one of those "independent" leagues (TNA).
    Now, I am not as big a wrestling fan as I once was, but I remember when he came on the wrestling scene, over 10 years ago.
    You know how wrestlers look on television? They look a lot smaller. This guy, in real life, is HUGE. HUGE. He's my height, but about twice as big as me. His calf muscle is bigger than my chest.
    Anyway, he and his wife were in today, looking at wallpaper in Home Decor. That department as adjacent to mine. I'm in my department, peddling paint, when I hear "SON OF A BITCH!"
    I stop what I'm doing (Luckily, I'm not busy), get out from behind the counter, and look down the aisle. Here comes Mr. Wrestler and wife. Mr. W is FUMING mad.
    Me = Me, the paint god
    MW = Mr. Wrestler
    MWW = Mr. Wrestler's Wife
    Me: "Is there a problem?"
    MW: "I want to see a manager! That lady doesn't know what she's doing!"
    MWW: *calmly* "We're trying to get help in wallpaper, but she don't know anything."
    Me: "Ok, let me see if I can help. I know that Martha back there is new to the department, so she's not really up to speed on everything."
    MW: *Fists clenching* "I want to see the store manager! We're going someplace else!"
    MWW: "Honey, shut up."
    MW is now punching his hand with the other one, like he wants to do some bodily harm. So I ask:
    Me: "Are you going to hit me? Because that would be something I could tell my grandchildren about. I'd prefer an autograph, but I could handle a battlefield story. Just not my face, please. I got a hot date tonight"
    MWW starts laughing. MW looks like and chuckles.
    MW: "Shut up, dude. Can you help us or not?" Said with a much lighter tone now.
    Me: "Of course! You practically built your house with our stuff. You're going to get help."
    I take them back to Home Decor and show them wallpaper. Martha comes up and apologizes, saying that she is new, and the stuff they were asking her were things she didn't quite now yet. They (MR. W, actually) apologizes to her. Then the veteran of HD comes back from her break, and she helps as well. The wrestling couple now has 3 people helping them pick out wallpaper.
    They left very happy.

    Okay, now.. you may be thinking that Mr. W is an SC. Nope. Maybe a bad day or something. Every time he has been in, he has been the nicest, sweetest guy you could ever meet. Always helpful, always respectful, always joking around (in a good way). I've talked to him many, many times, and we're on a first name basis (He bought lots of paint. And he wouldn't let me call him Mr. Reallastname). I've never bothered him about his career, or hounded him for an autograph (but I wouldn't mind one), just treated him like a normal person.

    But could you imagine the story that would be?
    "Well, kids, back in 2007, I was hit by Mr. W because he couldn't get help at the wallpaper desk."
    "Grandpa, who is Mr. W?" Heh
    Age and wisdom don't necessarily go together. Some people just become stupid with more authority.

    "Who put the goat in there? The yellow goat I ate."

  • #2
    One of the famous wrestlers who lives around here finds himself quite amusing. He'll go up to the counter and do the whole bulgy neck, wrestler voice (like they do on tv) just to see if the sales person will get rattled.

    If you do then he continues.
    If you don't then he laughs, jokes, and goes on like a normal, average guy.

    Ultimately, he's really a nice guy. And yes, he's HUGE in real life also.
    "I don't want any part of your crazy cult! I'm already a member of the public library and that's good enough for me, thanks!"

    ~TechSmith 314
    HellGate: London

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    • #3
      My immediate guess would be steroids, because NOBODY gets that big naturally.

      And it would explain the short temper and over-reaction.

      Knightmare, I LOVE the avatar!

      At Wondercon, there was a group dressed as the King and his Knights (and Tim) from Holy Grail. Their costumes were really well done, including coconut shells.
      Last edited by MadMike; 03-06-2007, 09:23 PM. Reason: merge
      Labor boards have info on local laws for free
      HR believes the first person in the door
      Learn how to go over whackamole bosses' heads safely
      Document everything
      CS proves Dunning-Kruger effect

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      • #4
        Who was the wrestler that you are talking about?
        Under The Moon Paranormal Research
        San Joaquin Valley Paranormal Research

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        • #5
          I love it when famous people are really down to earth and nice. We have a former very famous boyband member come in and being pharmacy I tend to hear all his ailments and injuries. One day he was in and two girls started flipping out. Problem is they got his name wrong XD. I've changed names to project identity but you get the joke

          GIRLS: Omg omg you're Scott!! omg
          HIM: sorry you have the wrong person
          GIRL: omg you must be Scott you look so much like him
          HIM: sorry

          Scott was in the same band XD. When they left we both laughed and I finished serving him before saying 'thank you Scott' He laughed and said 'Scott is going to love this when I tell him about it. He hated me being more popular'

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          • #6
            Totally off topic but...

            One of the Hardy boys hit on me at a club one night. I'm assuming he was drunk cuz I never get hit on (I'm a bit of a wallflower in large groups), but he was convinced I should go on tour with them and act as their manager. I was "just so small and cute" that he couldn't help but to want to be near me. Not in a creepy way-actually it was very flattering, even though he prolly said that to all the girls...

            *sigh*
            I know I'm laughing but it's really not funny. - Me
            "I was in the hall. I know, because I was there." - Clue

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            • #7
              Sorry, but wandering around doing the bulgy neck and/or wrestler voice and/or punching fist in hand is sucky even if you're not a wrestler. That sort of implied threat of violence is totally out of line for dealing with a retail drone who's chained to the spot, as it were, and has to tolerate it. Not cool. Being a wrestler doesn't make it cool (and arguably makes it even less so, since you're big and you act scary for a living).

              Someone pulled that on me, they'd get my "stupid retailer" persona, which is when I'm remarkably and unapologetically struck too stupid to help someone. ("I don't know about that. I can't help you. I don't know. That's not store policy." and so on, all spoken entirely deadpan.) Or they might get my (thusfar unused) "police-calling retailer" persona, depending on how far they pushed it and how serious they looked. And this would go for a 98 lb weakling a much as for a big burly wrestler -- I don't have any intention of trading blows with anyone ever, while I'm at work or not.

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              • #8
                I should clear that up. Mr. W wasn't making that gesture to me, to his wife, or to anyone. He was kinda looking up at the ceiling, and making that smacking gesture in a subconscious way. And it wasn't a "SMACK! SMACK!" it was a "smack smack"

                But I do agree with you. If I didn't know this guy, I wouldn't have said what I did. And I probably would have gone to a manager or got the phone ready. But as I said, I've been dealing with him for almost a year, getting to know him, joking around with him. He is a very laid back, cool kind of guy. Very nice, very personable. But his ring persona is an asshat. Go figure.
                Last edited by Knightmare; 03-08-2007, 04:17 AM.
                Age and wisdom don't necessarily go together. Some people just become stupid with more authority.

                "Who put the goat in there? The yellow goat I ate."

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                • #9
                  And I should clear up that the wrestler I mentioned isn't really threatening. You'd be surprised how many people wilt and tremble with a simple, "How ya doin' today?" when a wrestler is "in character".
                  "I don't want any part of your crazy cult! I'm already a member of the public library and that's good enough for me, thanks!"

                  ~TechSmith 314
                  HellGate: London

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