My truck. Get your ass off of it.

[ShinyGreenApple]

So after work today, I headed to Starbucks with two coworkers, and the husband of one coworkers. We're all sitting in there, laughing, carrying on, drinking our drinks, having a good time, when I look up and . . . oh hell no. Some girl is out in the parking lot, chatting with friends, and she is full up leaned against the side of my truck. Mind, she wasn't damaging it or anything, but just . . . no. You don't touch other people's things. If it's a friend or acquaintance, I don't care, but I don't touch stranger's vehicles and I expect the same.

Me: "I wonder if my remote keyless will work from here . . ."

Coworker's husband: "Do it, DO IT!"

Me: "Dammit I don't think it worked."

CWH: "Yes it did, ha! She's looking over here."

He was right. She made catbutt face in the direction of the coffee shop, and then leaned BACK onto the truck.

*BEEP*

Repeat.

Me: "Seriously, bitch?!"

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*

She made a final catbutt face and finally got off and went back to her own car or her boyfriend's, I really don't care whose it was. A normal person would have scooted at the fist beep. It was pretty funny though, I have to admit.

[MoonCat]

Too bad you don't have a remote control air horn. OO-GAH, OO-GAH!!! That would do it

[ShinyGreenApple]

I really do wish I had a louder, more obnoxious horn for occasions like this

[mathnerd]

I will admit to intentionally setting off the alarm on my father's antique Mustang in a similar situation.

[ShinyGreenApple]

I should have hit the panic button and done the same so she just thought she tripped the alarm, it at least wouldn't have given away the fact that she was being watched and we were deliberately screwing with her. But hey, don't touch my stuff.

[AmbrosiaWriter]

BahahahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHa *gasp* hahahahahahahahahah!

*chokes*

X_X

[Eevie]

It's nearly one in the morning now and everything is funny. Especially now that I read this I have tears running down my face. Shame my car can't do this. Someone seems to enjoy smoking next to my car. What makes this worse is I can't handle being around cigarette smoke, it makes me really dizzy. Oh would I enjoy this!

[dalesys]

I'm partial to the Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers solution:
(1) Megillah-watt surround sound system.
(2) Recording of a semitruckload of live hogs at 90mph/145kph brakes locked & jack-knifed coming right atcha.

Result: Buster Brown Skidmarks on the sitzmark.

[sms001]

Above and beyond the 'respecting other's property' thing, you have no idea of what she could be wearing or have in her back pockets that could be scratching your truck unbeknownst to you. And I second the panic button idea for next time.

BTW: VERY handy tip. You can unlock most vehicles with a wireless fob through your phone. If you lock your key in your car and someone else has a second fob, call them and have them activate the unlock button while pointing it at the phone pickup. On your end, hold the receiver about a foot away from the door lock. Boom, you're in.

ETA: For those of you who won't read the whole thread, Sparky was kind enough to catch that this does, in fact, not work. My apologies.
http://www.snopes.com/autos/techno/keyless.asp

[raudf]

It's more amusing when you're in the vehicle, or in my case, out of the vehicle with Mom in her truck. Some idiot decided to lean up on it while she was in it. She was a reserve deputy at the time, so she just flipped the switch and we both watched the idiot(s the other was a friend, who may or may not have been next to his own vehicle) bolt for the hills.

Mom said she was going for the PA system when she hit the siren. Sure, mom.. sure you were.

[protege]

I should have hit the panic button and done the same so she just thought she tripped the alarm, it at least wouldn't have given away the fact that she was being watched and we were deliberately screwing with her.

I admit that I did that occasionally when I had my Mazda. The key fob had a panic button, which was great to use if idiots wanted to lean on the car. It had all the annoying features of an actual alarm--loud horn, flashing lights...and if it went on long enough, a few onlookers trying to figure out what the hell was going on

But, the little 'chirp' from the remote (after locking the car) was sometimes used for another purpose. That is, it kept the cat off the car. That furry bastard would get himself covered in mud...and leave footprints all over it. He'd go on the hood, windows, roof, and trunk. Annoying, especially since it was always after I'd washed the car!

[fma_fanatic]

I've always decided that if anyone leans against my car, I'd hid the panic button. Unless you're paying my car payment, don't lean on the car. I know it's an older car, but dammit, it's my car.

[ShinyGreenApple]

Exactly, it's the audacity of it. I mean, exactly WTF did she think she was? That thing is almost paid for and I've worked my butt off so I could pay it off early, I'll be damned if anyone is going to treat it like their personal post.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

I've always decided that if anyone leans against my car, I'd hid the panic button. Unless you're paying my car payment, don't lean on the car.

Hell, even if you ARE making the goddamned car payment, don't lean on the car to begin with. Geez . . .

I like the panic button idea very much. I'll have to keep that in mind later this year if our plan to buy a 2nd vehicle pans out, for I would sooo love to use that when I'm out and about.

[An Haddock]

"You don't fuck another man's vehicle."
"You don't it."
"It's just against the rules."


Also, from The Way of the Gun (EXTREMELY NSFW)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xsaMcw69D8