WTF is with people walking into a food service place and ordering massive amounts of food and beverage... but taking 60 years to do so because they've no clue what they want?!??
Every Friday, I stop by the Starbucks on the way to work and buy myself a *deep breath* Iced-Quad-Venti-Toffee-Nut-Brevé-Extra-Light-Ice-No-Whip-White-Mocha (can you tell I used to work for SB? ). Being a regular, the baristas are awesome, and usually have my drink ready before I open my mouth. Today, however, I was directly behind this older lady (50-ish), who was quite obviously an entitlement whore. I say this because among other things she has that particular shade of bleach blond (you know the one), she's wearing several rings with diamonds big enough to knock you out (never mind they're poor quality, it's SIZE that matters!), and she's got this little-bitty cell phone with a leopard-skin print case. Right, anyway, none of my business, right? Wrong. Because she gets up there, holds out a Post-It note covered in teeny-tiny writing, and starts asking the poor barista all sorts of questions. Mind you, there's a line out the door of folks waiting to get their daily caffeine fix. Also, if you know nothing about Sbucks, know this: Corporate standards require them to take no more than 3 minutes from the time you walk in the door to the time you have your drink in hand. This lady was not only displaying severe entitlement behavior, she was throwing one HELL of a monkey wrench into the baristas' day.
This was bad enough, but I'm standing there, with about 12 people behind me, and she finally gets her order together (1 grande Caramel Macchiato, 1 grande Hazelnut Latte, 3 grande Hot Chocolates) and we've been standing there for about 10/12 minutes (no lie, I checked the clock). We're all thinking "OK! 5 drinks, but hey, it's cool she's almost done, right?" WRONG. She opens her cell phone and starts dialing, slowly. I've had no caffeine yet, so my brain's a little fuzzy, but the guy right behind me asks, "What the hell is she doing?" to which I respond, dumbfounded, "She's calling someone."
The guy is faster on my feet than I am (obviously he's on his second trip for caffeine) and says, "Ma'am, some of us back here are busy people, and would like to get our coffee and move on." I'm silently applauding this (again, brain no work no caffeine. Shagga need happy tasty beverage 'fore brain work gud) when she says, with a sickly-sweet smile on her face, "Well, no one's stopping you from leaving. I'm waiting for my order."
At this point, my drink has been ready and sitting in front of me for about 5 mins (I told you they were awesome!). A Shift Supervisor (I know this 'cause she was wearing a black apron 'stead of green) comes to the front, opens her till and starts ringing up the rest of us to get things moving again.
As I was driving away, sipping my happy, happy beverage, my brain finally kicks into gear, and here's what I really wish I'd been awake enough to say to her:
1) If you have a massive order like that, I do not think it is too much to ask that you have everything ready before you step up to the counter.
2) Especially if you have a massive order, please wait for a not-quite-so-busy time to ask your server questions. This lady acted like she'd never been in an Sbucks before; she was asking what a Frappuccino was!
3) If your order has been taken, MOVE THE FUCK DOWN! They're not giving you your drinks right there. Had you been paying the least amount of attention, you'd have seen everyone else moving down the bar to the drink station, where your massive order will be set when it's completed.
4) If you have not completed your order, but you knew you were coming in here (as evidenced by the Post-It Note of Doom), why the FUCK didn't you call Person X before you got up to the front? Now you're just being FUCKING rude by holding up the rest of us. If Person X didn't know you were hitting Sbucks, too bad for them.
5) If someone points out you're holding up a line, the polite, courteous, and correct response is not "You can leave." but "I'm sorry, would you like to go ahead of me?" Does this not make sense? If someone else, without jumping in front of you, points out that there's a HUGE line behind you, would not the correct course of action be to let things thin out a bit and then get back to your server?
I am so very sorry for the baristas that my brain was not functional enough to say these things. I really, really hope karma gets that entitlement bitch soon.
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