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  • Wow, thats.....um.....Embarassing (NSFW?)

    So I got dragged by my girlfriend into one of the local Porn shops because she wanted to get a gag gift for a relatives wedding. It's freakin' hot outside, so I figure just go inside, pretend to be looking at the merchendise, and take advantage of the A/c. And don't make any eye contact with anyone.

    The minute I enter, something had to catch my eye. And it was a laugh.

    I notice plastered behind the register, a polaroid of a 40/50 yr old woman holding a sex toy. Below the picture, it read: Caught stealing this $25 sex toy from us (XX/XX/XX). Prosecuted XX/XX/XX. Banned from the store.

    The cashier noticed me looking, and remarked "Yeah, sucks to be her. I heard she got caught right after she served her time in jail. Again for Shoplifting."

    I shake my head and walk to my gf with a smirk on my face.

  • #2
    Oh, ew.

    I can see the point of having a picture of the woman, mentioning she's banned.

    But a picture of her using the item she stole?
    Unseen but seeing
    oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
    There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
    3rd shift needs love, too
    RIP, mo bhrionglóid

    Comment


    • #3
      Haha That's hilarious and embarrassing rolled up into one.
      "Penny Lou Pingleton, you are absolutely, positively, permanently punished! You will live on a diet of saltines and tang, and you'll never leave this room again....Devil child! Devil child!"

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth BeckySunshine View Post
        Oh, ew.

        I can see the point of having a picture of the woman, mentioning she's banned.

        But a picture of her using the item she stole?
        I don't recall her putting the sex toy into her .

        Comment


        • #5
          Quoth BeckySunshine View Post
          Oh, ew.

          I can see the point of having a picture of the woman, mentioning she's banned.

          But a picture of her using the item she stole?
          holding holding holding.
          Not using...
          ewwww dirty thought

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth BeckySunshine View Post
            Oh, ew.

            I can see the point of having a picture of the woman, mentioning she's banned.

            But a picture of her using the item she stole?
            Well considering what kind of shop it is narrows down what whe was intending to do with her 'shopping' anyway. I see no reason why shops can't advertise what the SC stole and she wasn't using it in the picture just holding it.
            How was I supposed to know someone was slipping you Birth Control in the food I've been making for you lately?

            Comment


            • #7
              Ha, that reminds me of the time I was driving through the little town of Red Lodge, Montana.

              Taco Time I think it was had on their huge Mcdonalds type sign "Don't take checks from "Dave Blanky", he has written 5 bad checks here".
              If watermelons are made up of water, what are kumquats made up of?
              www.myspace.com/rentalracer

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              • #8
                Not uncommon at all.

                I know the lady who works the night shift at the porn shop. Her son and I went to school together.

                They take photos of all shoplifters and post them on a bulletin board for all customers to see.
                You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

                Comment


                • #9
                  My bad.

                  The man of the household was distracting me at the time.
                  Unseen but seeing
                  oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
                  There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
                  3rd shift needs love, too
                  RIP, mo bhrionglóid

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    While I haven't seen anything like that, my old hometown just got the Wal-Mart of porn shops. No lie, there are 8 aisles of toys, 12 aisles of DVD's, and at least 15 racks of clothes. Then there is a whole separate section of smoking paraphenalia. The place is immense. My mom and I spent like 3 hours just ogling how HUGE this place is.
                    The only words you said that I understood were "His", "Phone" and "Ya'll". The other 2 paragraphs worth was about as intelligible as a drunken Teletubby barkin' come on's at a Hooter's waitress.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth Banrion View Post
                      While I haven't seen anything like that, my old hometown just got the Wal-Mart of porn shops.
                      I'm going to need a name and address for.... "research" purposes.
                      How was I supposed to know someone was slipping you Birth Control in the food I've been making for you lately?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        My roommates went from Virginia to Ohio once and saw all these signs for the "Super Super Super Store" or something like that and stopped on the way back from Ohio. Apparently, it was literally the size of a Walmart too, and they had everything you could think of. They brought me back an inappropriate lollipop

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Banrion View Post
                          While I haven't seen anything like that, my old hometown just got the Wal-Mart of porn shops. No lie, there are 8 aisles of toys, 12 aisles of DVD's, and at least 15 racks of clothes. Then there is a whole separate section of smoking paraphenalia. The place is immense. My mom and I spent like 3 hours just ogling how HUGE this place is.
                          Quoth Soulstealer View Post
                          I'm going to need a name and address for.... "research" purposes.
                          Was it anything like this?: http://www.castlemegastore.com/locations/
                          And Soulstealer, I thought you'd like it too for, ahem, "research". I haven't been in it....yet, but it fascinates the hell out of me!
                          It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth Soulstealer View Post
                            I'm going to need a name and address for.... "research" purposes.
                            VIP - 480 Oakland St
                            Manchester, CT 06042
                            The only words you said that I understood were "His", "Phone" and "Ya'll". The other 2 paragraphs worth was about as intelligible as a drunken Teletubby barkin' come on's at a Hooter's waitress.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Oh boy, this story gets better.

                              About a few months back, I saw one of the anchor store's LP's run into the parking lot racing after a shoplifter, whom exactly matches the Porn shoplifter. Kinda noticed, thought it was just another day.

                              I was summoned back to work today to talk to the Store's LP due to the incident described elsewhere. The other stores LP's were there as well.

                              After the paperwork was done, I chatted briefly with one of the LP's. Turns out she was one of the folks chasing after the shoplifter that I saw a few months ago. I then mentioned I thought I saw that shoplifter elsewhere, and she goes "Oh yeah. When the cops came to pick her up, one of them remarked Hey, it's (name). So, graduated from stealing dildos? And we were looking at her with a confused look, because all she stole from us was alot of perfumes from our mens department. We were thinking of dropping the charges and just ban her, but after we found out this bit of info, we quickly pressed charges."

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