"Does it take singles?"

[Dreamstalker]

Saw this on the T on the way to work. I've mentioned before that the new fareboxes on the older streetcars like to not work on occasion.

This one had decided not to accept dollar bills. Fare without a CharlieCard is $2.

A guy gets on the stop after mine and tries to feed two singles into the slot. The angry BEEPBEEPBEEP given by the farebox upon attempted insertion of the first bill should have clued him in that it wasn't working (as well as the red LED next to the slot, but oh well).

Guy: "It's not taking my money. The fare is two dollars, right?"
Driver: "Yup. The machine isn't accepting dollar bills right now, so it's the card or exact change."
Guy: "OK. Will it take singles?"

The whole front of the train turns their heads in unison to witness this failure of comprehension.

Businessman next to me: "No dollar bills means no paper money at all."
Guy: "Oh. What about a fiver?"
Businessman: "Even if it was working, you wouldn't get any change back." (I'm sure the MBTA would be grateful for the donation though)

The next car on the train did have a working bill acceptor, which the guy understood after a few more minutes of back-and-forth.

So tell me, when did "dollar bill" and "single" come to mean two completely different things?

[MMATM]

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd.
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned.

I wonder if we can switch this guy with poor old Charlie. It'd be cool to pay for your T service with the "DumbassCard".

[Dreamstalker]

I still wonder why, of all names, they chose Charlie for the thing.

Heee...twould be amusing if the subway did what some of the buses do and collect the fare upon exiting. Poor schmuck would be riding the train forever, or at least until he managed to bum/find enough change to make the fare.

[MMATM]

look up "The M.T.A. Song" better known as "Charlie on the M.T.A." (MTA is what MBTA used to be called)

it was originally a song created (to the tune of "The Ship that Never Returned") as a campaign for walter o'brien when he ran for mayor of boston...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_MTA_Song
^theres the full story

and here's the lyrics (for anyone who wants them)
the italicized words were replaced in later versions by a banjo solo

Well let me tell you all a story of a man named Charlie
On a tragic and fateful day
He put ten cents in his pocket, kissed his wife and family,
Went to ride on the MTA

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

Charlie handed in his dime at the Kendall Square Station,
And he changed for Jamaica Plain
When he got there the conductor asked for one more nickel,
Charlie couldn't get off of that train

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

Now all night long Charlie rides through the station crying
"What will become of me?
How can I afford to see my sister in Chelsea,
Or my cousin in Roxbury?"

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

Charlie's wife goes down to the Scollay Square station,
Every day at a quarter past two
And through the open window she hands Charlie a sandwich,
As the train comes rumbling through

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

"I can't help," said the conductor,
"I'm just working for a living,
But I sure agree with you."
"For the nickels and the dimes you'll be spending in Boston
You'd be better off in Timbuktu."

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

As his train rolled on
underneath Greater Boston
Charlie looked around and sighed:
"Well, I'm sore and disgusted
And I'm absolutely busted;
I guess this is my last long ride."

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

Now you citizens of Boston don't you think it's a scandal,
How the people have to pay and pay?
Fight the fare increase, and vote for George O'Brien,
Get poor Charlie off the MTA

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

But did he ever return?
No, he never returned,
And his fate is still unlearn'd
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston,
He's the man who never returned

He's that man who never returned,
He's that man who never returned

[Dreamstalker]

Oh, cool!

Ten cents...*sigh* I've read that MBTA fares are increasing faster than anything else in the city (and they still have a huge budget shortfall...).

[MMATM]

Indeed they do. But, hopefully, someone will come up with a way to unf*ck the f*cking f*cked f*ckedness that is f*cking Boston.
Sorry, had to censor myself. Since I don't have the accent any more (not for about 10 years now) I can't use the word fuck that many times in a sentence.

[K'Z'K]

Far more entertaining than "Charlie on the MTA" is the Dropkick Murphys' version, "Skinhead on the MBTA." The (censored by me for the faint of eyes) lyrics:

Now let me tell you a story
of a big ole' skinhead
On a tragic and fateful day
He put 10 cents in his pocket
kicked his wife and family
And went to ride on the M.B.T.A.

[chorus]
Did he ever return,
no he never returned
and his fate is still unknown (Oi! Oi! Oi!)
he may ride forever
'neath the Streets of Boston
he's the skinhead who never returned.

Skinhead goes down to the Kendall Sq. Station
and he changes for Jamaica Plain,
the conductor says skinhead I need a nickel,
skinhead punches him in the brain.

[chorus]

Now all night long
skinhead rides through the station
Wondering who can I go and see
Can't afford to buy crack in Chelsea
or a bundle in Roxbury.

[chorus]

Skinhead's wife goes to the Scollay Square Station
Everyday at quarter past two,
and through the open window
She hands skinhead a grenade
as the train comes a rumbling through.

[chorus]

Now you citizens of Boston
don't you think its a scandal
How the skinhead stole the train
What's the big f$%&in' deal,
he'll work for beer
Let the skinhead drive the train. [Alternately, "Let him drive the f*&%ing train"]

[chorus 2x]
He's the skinhead who never returned.
He's the skinhead who never returned.
I said the skin never returns.

[chorus 2x]
He's the skinhead who never returned.
He's the skinhead who never returned.

----

But I suppose having a "Skinhead" card would both lose the cute alliteration and maybe, possibly, give the oh-so-wrong image for the T...though really, recalling a song about a bizarre, overly complicated payment system is probably not the best idea for a fare card either. I guess the idea is, "you think this is bad, at least we let you off the train!"

-K'Z'K

[protege]

Indeed they do. But, hopefully, someone will come up with a way to unf*ck the f*cking f*cked f*ckedness that is f*cking Boston.

We're going through a similar mess here in Pittsburgh. The idiots who run our transit system gave themselves huge raises...even though the system is currently losing money, and just lost its government subsidies. It seems the state has had enough of bailing them out...and is insisting that they restructure things. They've already laid people off and cut service severely.

[Hon'ya-chan]

"Does it take singles?"

And here I thought this was a thread about strippers.

[mariamousie1]

Maybe he had a 2 dollar bill? I remember when Canada had those. Maybe he got his hands on one.

[Becks]

And here I thought this was a thread about strippers.

Alas, dashed hopes!!!

[Shabo]

*steps on soapbox*

I hated when they started implementing the Charlie system. They only did it on some lines at some stations, and not others. Since I rarely go into Boston, I didn't know where or when the stations had the Charlie system. I ended up walking forever one day trying to find a station that would take my charlie card because I didn't want to pull a $20 out of the atm just to get back on the T. I ended up having to get the $20 out anyway to pay for parking, but that's another story. We finally had a nice employee let us on since he knew how frustrated we were trying to find a freaking Charlie station.

I understand different methods of implementing a new IT system. (I'm an MIS major. This is what I want to do when I am done with college.) BUT I feel very strongly that the implementation method they chose was the wrong one. It was such a PITA for tourists (probably regulars too, until they got used to it) and for the employees who had to explain the system and help customers out with the machines that are used to purchase the tickets. They would have been much better off trying to implement the Charlie system everywhere as close together in time as possible.

*steps off soapbox*

Yeah, this guy is an idiot. And don't forget, with the Boston accent, it's not pronounced "Charlie". It's pronounced "Chah lee".