Get out of the way!!!!11!11!!! (long and pretty much a rant)

[Screamarie]

I'm sure some people have dealt with this and ranted about it plenty but sometimes I just can't deal with things unless I rant to someone so here goes!

Today my mother asked me to go out to the grocery store because, amazingly, like every other American, we need to stock the fridge and cabinets. So I drive down there, knowing it's going to be a fun-filled adventure as it always is. I thank my lucky stars when I see that there is light traffic in the parking lot, not many cars, making it alot easier on me.

Well I soon found out that my lucky stars hate me and played a trick on me. The store is PACKED!!! The parking lot was nearly bare but the store aisles weren't.

Now here's a couple of fun facts about me.
Fact 1: It's the middle of the month and my ovaries are having a hay day. To put it nicely Aunt Flo is visiting, I'm cramping, in pain, and not happy long before I step into the store.

Fact 2: I have what is known as Social Anxiety and I'm very particular about my personal space. I have never killed anyone over this before but I often find myself fighting bloodlust.

But, I must charge on, for I have promised my mother grocieries and also, without using a check at the grocery store, I have no money to bring dinner home with as it is far to hot to cook.

I start down the aisles and about every few steps I have to stop ABRUPTLY because someone will jump out from between aisles. I'm a polite person, when I force someone to stop in such a way, I always apologize or at least say excuse me but, of course, I am not allowed such a courtesy and will be SNUBBED, they giving me dirty looks, as if I was the one stopping them! I'm being kind and courtious and allowing you to pass, I could just charge on and say "F*** you" but I don't.

Well that aside, I continue to try and navigate through aisles as kids wander around aimlessly, mommy and daddy paying little attention. I'm trying to go through aisles and I either end up having to go around or stop and wait as someone stands there deciding what they want or sorting through coupons.

Now I'm an understanding person, I spent most of my childhood standing beside my mother, dancing around in one spot like I was on speed because I was bored, as my mother sorted through coupons and items....but the thing is that my mother and her cart where on one side of the lane and from there she would judge the culinary offerings of our local grocery store.

It doesn't take an ENTIRE lane to decide between green giant and libby's!!! I watch as people, grown adults apparently, place their cart to one side...and then stand in the center of the remaining aisle! WTH?!!!!!! Are you blind? Deaf? Or simply just dumb? There are other customers than you!! I know there are! I can prove it to you, I promise!!!

Proceeding on though, I have a question. Does anyone else have the impression that the grocery store is a party? Maybe a singles dance? A three-ring circus probably? Well I'm here to destroy your happy little bubble. Sorry but it had to be done because if it isn't I'm going to hurt someone.

I understand if you notice someone and you two are having a nice little chat. Great! Good deal! Communication is a wonderful thing and I'm happy for you...but is it too much to ask that you do your best to situate yourself in a way that doesn't block an entire aisle off to yourself?

I get that it's hard, seeing as the aisles are small and there isn't alot of room in the store but please! pay attention! You know if you have no where else to go but the aisle, fine but, pay attention and MOVE if someone is trying to get by you. While I was there at the store I actually came across this woman standing there with a couple, a cart in tow, blocking the entrance to an aisle I wanted to go down!

The woman is standing there talking about sentences for being caught with drugs and unfortunately, I was already in a bad mood and I didn't want to have to fight with these three over aisle entrances, so I just went down another aisle and around but I mean is it not OBVIOUS that you're in the way? I mean it certainly is to everyone around else that's trying to go down that aisle!

Needless to say I got my items, paid, and left before I felt a true pyschopathic urge but I just gotta know, WHAT HAPPENED?! I mean, does anyone else here agree that when you were growing up, your mother or father or both would have become SO angry at you for acting so very rude? When you were younger didn't your parents beat manners and courtesy into your head so much that even extreme brain hemorraghing wouldn't make you forget?

*sighs* Maybe I was just one of a few in my town. I'll get off the soapbox, after all, I'm sure everyone has the same complaints and I'm just wasting space but I just wanted to get the stress of my day and dealing with these people who have seemed to have forgetten what manners are, off my chest. Thanks for anyone who reads this and deals with my crap.

[Catwoman2965]

I feel your pain; especially having to deal with it during "auntie flo" - OMG - people have no clue whatsoever....I'm alwways careful to move my cart aside if i need to look for something....but some people just don't get it.

And did you ever notice how, if you go down one aisle, and encounter an SC, you will then encounter them in every single aisle from then on! It's like they know, and follow you!

My mom HATED grocery shopping, so she would avoid taking me at all costs! she would go when my dad was home, or drop me at a friends to play while she went. But yes, if I EVER acted that way anywhere in public, i was in trouble. She would start with the evil eye, and if that didn't work, she would just simply take me out of whereever we were, and leave. She would also stop the car if i was misbehaving and say "do you want to walk home?" shut me up pretty fast!

[Becks]

I feel your pain.

Trust me.

I work in a supermarket.

Weekends, holiday time, and days before a snowstorm, especially, are like what you wrote, but WORSE.

I hate people.

And so I don't do all my shopping at once. Every few days after one of my shifts I'll pick up a few things.

[MystyGlyttyr]

I used to say "Excuse me" and all that fun, polite stuff. Never worked. NEVER. Worked.

So these days when they stand there chatting while I'm trying to get to the entire aisle of canned soup that they're blocking, I just "accidently" belt them in the head with stuff from the shelf they're blocking. Then start apologizing PROFUSELY while they try to staunch the blood flow.

I know I can take a long ass time to decide what I want, but I'm also dancing back and forth in the aisle and looking around at who's near me so I can stay out of people's way.

[JustADude]

I used to say "Excuse me" and all that fun, polite stuff. Never worked. NEVER. Worked.

Usually works with me... weird... then again, I'm a statistical anomaly when it comes to size, so I guess my experiences in public don't EVER end up being normal.

[Banrion]

Thankfully, my fiance hates grocery shopping as much as I do, and he will help. The strategy we have worked out is thus: He takes the cart, we go down the dairly aisle, he grabs the products from the right, I go left. Once we are in the back aisle of the store, I head down the next aisle and he takes the cart down the 3rd aisle. We meet at the front, I drop my load and go up the 4th aisle, he takes the 5th, repeat until at the other end of the store. Then while he is grabbing ice cream and bread in the last aisle, I do a quick pass down the back aisle again and grab our meats. Meet back at the front & checkout. Our best time was 30 mins from the time we left our house to the time all the bags were unloaded at home!! Of course this only works for the standards. If we are having a special meal for some reason, we will either make a special trip just for that stuff, or I make sure to give him a complete list of the unusuals. We also go at 7am on Sunday morning to avoid almost everyone.

[blas]

I discovered a long time ago that you cannot go to Wal-Mart nor the grocery store to only get 5 things and get out within 30 minutes. It's impossible.

Well, I only have 1 free day to do that, Saturday, so I'm screwed beforehand...

I HATE grocery shopping. I HATE it. Wal-Mart has everything I need without making multiple trips and is the cheapest, so I go there. And I hold my breath.

The stench of dirty diapers and other smells coming from children, the stench of BO from dirty people, the presence of WAY too many people in one building, nearly being ran over by a soccer mom and her cart full of kids, trashy people in groups of 10 (all looking frighteningly alike) and too many tweens on the loose...

ALWAYS, right where something I need and can normally get to very quickly....is always blocked by some stupid woman or old person. I have to park my cart behind them and wait. And wait. For them..........to..........mooooooooooooove.

And the OLD people! I either forego buying milk on Saturdays or I will just get it at the gas station on Monday, because I swear to GOD, every time I go to Wal-Mart, an entire nursing home full of old people (each old fart has their own cart) is standing next to the milk/egg cooler, just STARING at it. So there are over 10 carts, inside each cart is two cans of soup and catfood, and an old person drooling, staring at the coolers. I CANNOT get to the coolers without pushing through all of them. But of course, that would make me a "rude youngster", so you can see why 80% of the time I forget about the milk. It's truly a sight to see......old people asleep standing up......

[myswtghst]

And this is why I go shopping at the 24-hr Meijer after I get out of work at midnight. Granted, it sucks to not be able to get fresh sliced deli meats and such, but I'd rather buy it prepackaged than risk losing control and getting into a brawl at the grocery store. It may take me an hour because I have a very short attention span and am tired/spacey from work, but at least it's taking that long due to my wandering tendencies, and not someone else pissing me off.

Also, I was one of those crazy, chatty, bouncy children. My mother agrees that I probably have undiagnosed ADD/ADHD, but she raised me well and kept me close when we went to the store, so I wasn't ever the kid running in between strangers legs and darting out in front of their carts.

[KellyHabersham]

This usually happens to me in the shoe department at the Target near my house......families with one or more carts will insist on parking right in the middle of the aisle, and stay there for hours. (or so it seems, anyhow)

[powerboy]

I used to say "Excuse me" and all that fun, polite stuff. Never worked. NEVER. Worked.

So these days when they stand there chatting while I'm trying to get to the entire aisle of canned soup that they're blocking, I just "accidentally" belt them in the head with stuff from the shelf they're blocking.

The same with me. But with the exception, that I say excuse me about 2 times. After that, if you get hit by a product, it is your own damn fault. I hate it when, kids are running around like chickens with their head cut off. When I was little, I would be in deep shit, if I ever done that. I also hate it, when someone behind me in line, bumps with the their cast/basket. The 1st time with the cart, its cool, I see it as an accident. The second time, so fourth, I will say something. I had to do that this last weekend.

[tollbaby]

Powerboy, I'm serious dude... I like you, but I'm gonna steal your comma key LOL (just teasing~)

[powerboy]

Powerboy, I'm serious dude... I like you, but I'm gonna steal your comma key LOL (just teasing~)

I understand I do too many comma's. At least, if someone hacks my account. You will be able to tell the difference

[sms001]

Well that aside, I continue to try and navigate through aisles as kids wander

I don't even bother anymore. I park my cart as unobtrusively as possible on the perimeter and then do two or three aisles "on foot" then dump into the cart and move to the next set of aisles. I've completely given up on depending on other people's awareness of those around them, common courtesy, or common sense.

[Jack7957]

I had to teach my wife how to shop for groceries. She's the type that goes from one end of the store to the other, then back again, because she would go down her list item by item, rather than plan out her route through the store to minimize time. Plus she doesn't cross stuff off as she picks it up, so she'd be looking through her list trying to remember what she's already picked up. So now she makes the list, I take it once we're in the store and tell her what we're looking for next.

[myswtghst]

Yeah, Jack--I tend to make my grocery list by department, while I'm bored at work. I'll sit and think, what do I need from the deli? What veggies? etc. That way I have a plan of attack.