Subway suck

[bigjimaz]

Being forced into semi-retirement means two things. 1. I'm not working and my exposure to everyday suckiness is highly and blissfully nonexistent. 2. In the year that I haven't been out in the wonderful world of employment, I have packed a few more pounds on the already overloaded Big Jim frame. Because of the latter, I'm on a diet. My goal is 200 pounds, meaning I have 140 to lose. Enter Subway. Which is what I did tonight where the following occurred.

Little back story. The local Subway is running a sale on their Fresh Fit menu items. Any 6 inch sub from that part of the menu teamed up with a medium drink and a bag of Lays Baked chips for $4.29. The "Sandwich artist" was telling everyone about the deal after greeting them. This becomes important shortly. (I got the Veggie Delight combo)

Cast of characters.

SW: Sucktacular woman who is similarly framed to yours truly only in a much shorter and more dramatic fashion. (Read this as her looking basically like a pair of lumpy, tree trunk-sized stumps holding up an ass the size and basic shape of the Epcot Center Dome. All that is topped with a head that is dangerously close to being pinched off by the fat around her neck.)
SA: Sandwich artist, a very nice man who is maybe 40 and has the patience of a saint.
CA: Cashier
ME: Looking forward to the day that I can ask Raps to change my screen name to notsobigjimaz.

BOLD TYPE IN ALL CAPS denotes yelling.
Italics denotes my thoughts.

SA finishes my order, passes it to the cashier, thanks me and moves to SW.

SA: Hi! Could I interest you in our Fresh Fit sandwich combo today? (Cheery as hell)
SW: WHAT DID YOU SAY?
SA: I asked you if...
SW: I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID! DO IT LOOK LIKE I WANT DAT SHIT?
ME: No, but since you're a foot shorter and 100 pounds heavier than me, you should be.
SA: Sorry ma'am, It's just a promotional thing..
SW: WELL YOU OUGHTA STOP AXIN STUPID S**T LIKE DAT!
SA: Sorry, but I ask everyone. Now wha...
SW: NO YOU AIN'T. YOU AXED ME DAT BECAUSE I'M BIG.
ME: No honey, the Pentagon is big. You're HUGE.
SA: I assure you ma'am, I'm asking everyone the same thing.

At this point he turns to me looking for confirmation (I think) that he asked me the same thing, but seeing that I wasn't exactly the ideal person he wanted to back him up, closes his mouth and turns back to SW.

SW: BULLS**T! YOU GOTS SOMETHIN AGIN OVERWEIGHT FOLK, YOU F***IN STICK!
SA: Ma'am, my mom is overweight. I don't care what size you or anyone else is. It's just an advertising thing. Please, what can I get for you.

This seems to appease her momentarily. She proceeds to order 3 foot long BMT's with double meat, double cheese, no veggies with pickles and mayo. I wonder if she has a family at home or were they going to be gone before she left the parking lot.

SA finishes her order and slides the order to the cashier and thanks her.

SW: F**CK YOU!

SW waddles to the register as SA disappears to the back of the restaurant.

SW: You better get rid of that asshole. He's gonna run all the business outa da place.
CA: We aren't going to do that.
SW: WHY THE HELL NOT!
CA: He's the owner.

You know, I've been big all my life. I was 11½ pounds when I was born. I graduated high school at 455 pounds. it has taken me 35 years to get down to the 340 pounds I am now. Not one second of my life have I been angry about my weight. I know that I'm the reason I look like I do. I'm not sensitive about it. Hell, I joke about it, though someone told me I do that as a defense mechanism. Maybe they're right. If I ever get to the point where I jump on someone who is doing a shpeil, someone, ANYONE, please just shoot me.

[otakuneko]

Awesome. Just plain awesome.

[daleduke17]

CA: We aren't going to do that.
SW: WHY THE HELL NOT!
CA: He's the owner.

That is just one of the greatest things I have read recently. What kind of reaction did that "wonderful" customer have to that?

[bigjimaz]

Surprisingly, none. She grabbed her bag 'O calories and oozed out the door.

[iradney]

Surprisingly, none. She grabbed her bag 'O calories and oozed out the door.

Now I'm envisioning a pink slug with a bad brassy wig on it.

What a nasty nasty woman. I mean, I'm not exactly svelte, but I know why I'm like that, and I have no-one to blame but myself. And unless someone actually says to my face "Hot damn girl, your ass looks like two pigs wrestling in a blanket" I'm not going to assume anything they say has to do with my weight.

[The Gatekeeper]

And unless someone actually says to my face "Hot damn girl, your ass looks like two pigs wrestling in a blanket" I'm not going to assume anything they say has to do with my weight.

*pfffftttt*

:cleaning coffee off of her eMac:

Damn drink, then read....no drink, swallow, then read....yeah that's it.

[iradney]

*pfffftttt*

:cleaning coffee off of her eMac:

Damn drink, then read....no drink, swallow, then read....yeah that's it.

YES, my first Rule #1 victim! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!

[JustADude]

Wow. I feel ya, BigJimAZ.

I was about 420 at my worst, and my target is 270 (with high muscle mass *flex* ), and I've got about 110 more pounds to go, though it's more likely 140 if I count -Fat and +Muscle seperately. I am by no means a slim individual and, speaking from that position, I've noticed that there are overweight people and then there are fat people.

Overweight people are like you, me, and pretty much all of the other gourmands* on this board. We have a high level of body-fat, but we don't let it define us as people. It's just something to be gotten rid of for health issues, whenever we get around to it, and the body-image boost will only add to an already healthy sense of self-confidence. Fat people, on the other hand, have let their weight define them. They're corpulent, often to the point of obscenity; are too weak-willed, stupid, and set in their ways to fix the problem; have a crippled self-image and, therefore; take it out on others at any opportunity.

*Gourmand: One who enjoys large, hearty meals. Often overlaps with Gourmet, one who enjoys fine food.

[Seshat]

Definition challenge for you, then, JustADude.

What about people who have excess fat, but because of endocrine (or other) reasons, they've tried unsuccessfully to get rid of it and have self-image damage attributable to the fat, misdiagnoses, and other etceteras?

(Not me, but a person close to me. Currently successfully losing weight, finally, but only in the care of an endocrinologist, nutritionist, general practitioner and at least one other specialist.)(And no weight-loss surgery. Just getting the underlying disorders fixed, plus guidance on appropriate diet/exercise with those disorders, plus willpower.)

[Lace Neil Singer]

I'm happy with my shape; I have in fact spent many years coming to that decision. I'm not huge, but I'm not a dainty little pixie either. In fact, I wouldn't want to be. But no, I don't assume that anyone offering diet grub on offer is doing so cuz they think I'm big. The local Subway offered me a cookie the other day cuz I had a sub and a drink and it was part of an offer. I thanked them, said yes and took me, my cookie and my drink to a nearby table after paying. I didn't scream out "You're only offering me a cookie cuz you think I'm fat!" Then again, I'm not a screaming madwoman like this woman is. XD

[JustADude]

Definition challenge for you, then, JustADude.

What about people who have excess fat, but because of endocrine (or other) reasons, they've tried unsuccessfully to get rid of it and have self-image damage attributable to the fat, misdiagnoses, and other etceteras?

Special case. Since the body-fat and resulting damage is due to a malfunctioning gland, disease, hormonal imbalance, etc, etc, ad nausium, and not due to their own violation, they would fall under "Overweight", since they aren't remaining at their current weight through their own laziness, even in the cases where it does affect their self-image.

[digilight]

If there are two catagories of fat people

Happy fatties, we don't want to kill you just because you offered us a salad.
or
bitchie fatties, Ya'll best not be offering me no fucking bunnie food you son of a bitch or I will rip your head off and eat it like a damn turkey leg.

I think I would fall under the happy fattie catagory. Sure I'm fat, but I won't be offended if you offer me some bunnie chow either. Now I may decide to rip your head off and eat your soft candy filled center with a spoon if you piss me off to much though (does this put me in the scond catagory....wow maybe I really am evil).

[Rapscallion]

SW: You better get rid of that asshole. He's gonna run all the business outa da place.
CA: We aren't going to do that.
SW: WHY THE HELL NOT!
CA: He's the owner.

Pure comedy gold!

I don't really differentiate between happy and bitchie fatties. I'm one of the heaviest people at work, and I've noticed a difference. There are overweight people who can't or won't do any work, and there are overweight people such as me who can work skinny people under the table. I've done fourteen-hours shifts before, to the astonishment of some of my colleagues. They were passing out at the ten-hour stage.

Some of our drivers look as if they'd struggle to hold the wheel due to their gut size, but they'll work fifteen-hour days without a problem day after day until personnel tell them about the working time directive.

Compare that to a small number of the desk limpets we have who are overweight and you realise that some of us are comparatively healthy despite the extra weight.

Rapscallion

[Seshat]

they would fall under "Overweight", since they aren't remaining at their current weight through their own laziness, even in the cases where it does affect their self-image.

Cool.

There are overweight people who can't or won't do any work, and there are overweight people such as me who can work skinny people under the table. I've done fourteen-hours shifts before, to the astonishment of some of my colleagues. They were passing out at the ten-hour stage.

There can be an amazing amount of muscle hiding underneath a layer of fat. It can be very deceptive.

I can, with very little training (mostly a refresher on form and safety) push the heaviest weight on any leg-press machine I've ever seen. Without training, I can start using a leg abduction/adduction machine at about 3/4 of max, depending on what max for that machine is. Most people are surprised at that, because the muscle is hidden. I'm such a sneak.

[Broomjockey]

I can, with very little training (mostly a refresher on form and safety) push the heaviest weight on any leg-press machine I've ever seen.

Heh. Reminds me of the time I was dragged to the gym by my mother, and the trainer went to put me on the leg-press. I made it up over 200 before it took any kind of effort. Eventually the trainer gave up and moved me to another machine.

By the end of the visit, the trainer told me I was in excellent shape for the most part, I just needed to work on my stamina. I shot my mom an "I told you so" look