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"This IS the Express Lane, right???"

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  • "This IS the Express Lane, right???"

    I loudly asked my wife this when we went to check out at Walmart and saw these two well-off looking women in one of the Express Lanes with two heaping cartfulls of groceries. The cashier was contently scanning away and halfway through the second one and I saw the total from across the aisle on the little credit card scanner and it was at $213 and still climbing. So when we went into the other one next to them I asked my wife this loud enough so they'd hear it. She said it was and I loudly said, "Oh ok. Just checking. That's all" as I started to put my stuff on the table to be scanned. Out of the corner of my eye I could see them both glaring at me and giving me dirty looks. Such a shame because they seemed like they were in really cheerful moods and even chatting happily with the cashier when we arrived. I asked my wife quietly if they were to confirm it and she said they were. Gotta admit, it's fun to "poop in someone's Corn Flakes" when the situation calls for it.
    Last edited by ditchdj; 12-06-2007, 01:29 AM. Reason: Edit grammar

  • #2
    Similar situation with my Dad. He was in line behind this ASS who had a ton of crap to pay for in, of course, the Express lane. And he was stupid enough to turn to my Dad and say something snotty about how stupid and slow the cashier was, trying to get my dad to commiserate.

    My dad said, "I know what you mean about stupid people everywhere. I mean, I got in the Express Lane and and here I'm having to wait behind an ass with two or three dozen items."

    My dad doesn't tend to keep his mouth shut. Which rocks.

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    • #3
      I've seen this topic on CS several times, and one thing to keep in mind is that not every person in the express lane with a full cart is there because they are being entitled jerks.

      I like to get my grocery shopping out of the way early on the weekends (6am-7am). There is almost no traffic, almost empty parking lot, very few customers and the lines usually have only 1 or 2 people in them by the time you checkout.

      One weekend I had finished my shopping and had about 65 items in my cart and was making my way to the open regular lane that had about 5 people in it. The regular lane is right by the front doors, the express lane is 9 lanes down farthest from the door. I'm walking past the express lane when the cashier pops out from behind her register.

      M: me
      C: cashier

      C: I can take you here.
      M: (Confused) Umm, you're the express lane!?
      C: Yeah, I can take you over here.
      M: I've got 65 items, I'm waaay over the 12 item limit.
      C: It's OK, it's not a problem.
      M: You're the express lane, I don't want to get you in trouble.
      C: It's cool.

      At this point she grabs the end of my cart and pulls it into the lane, hops behind the register and quickly starts scanning my stuff.

      M: OK, if anyone comes up and complains I'll let you explain it to them, and Thanks.
      C: No worries.

      Luckily she finished quickly and no one came up. The whole time I'm thinking (hurry up, hurry up, nobody come, nobody come).

      So just remember that for every 999,999 entitled jackasses with a full cart in the express lane theres 1 guy there because of a bored cashier who wanted something to do.

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      • #4
        I know. That's why I kinda said it in a nonchalant way in that both the cashier and the two women heard me. But it wouldnt have made sense to me since most of the lines there had no more than two customers in each one. But when I saw the two women glaring at me out of the corner of my eye and given that it's not far from a rich/snob/I'm better than everyone else town led me to believe that they just did it because they felt more important.

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        • #5
          I'd also like to believe that someone who was pulled over by the cashier wouldn't cast dirty looks at people who say "This is the express lane, right?" Again, not everyone would take it well, but most people would likely look, shrug, and go back to what they were doing.
          Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

          http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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          • #6
            ditchdj - My fiance and I had the exact same conversation about a week ago.

            "I thought this was the express lane?!"
            "Yeah me too!"

            We ended up getting into the one other lane that was open behind all the people with less than 12 items, which strangely wasn't the express lane. Everyone who would be eligable for express lane privilage got into the other line because idiot entitlement whore and her cart full of groceries was in the wrong lane.
            Would you like a Stummies?

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            • #7
              I am the one the clerk pulled into the express lane that someone chose to say something too . . ..
              The clerk looked up and said "I am the one who pulled her into my lane. There were no other customers with 12 or less items and the regular lines were long. This customer was just in the right place at the right time."

              I looked at the clerk . . .said Thank you . . and then"Gosh that was better than me looking at them and asking them why they don't know who I am"

              The funny thing . . .when the customer walked up . . . only had 10 items left to scan . . . his wait was the same as if I had the correct count for express to begin with.

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              • #8
                Quoth ditchdj View Post
                it's fun to "poop in someone's Corn Flakes" when the situation calls for it.
                I prefer "piss in someone's Cheerios", because the name of the cereal implies that happy times will be had upon consumption.
                Unless someone pissed in them.
                "We were put on this Earth to fart around, and don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise." -Kurt Vonnegut

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