Thwarting the local telemarketers using...

[jedifarfy]

The Mystical Answering Machine!

We've been getting phonecalls for my stepdad while he's at work. It soulds like a bank or office type thing, not sure why, and he doesn't know or care who they are.

They call at least once a week, and seem confused by our answering machine. It will do it's usual "Leave a message blah blah blah". Then all you hear is:

"Hello? Hello? Are you there? Hello? I'm calling for Soandso. Hello?" then click. Today's sounded like some automated voice at first, THEN the confused person on the other end.

Uh, last time I called and there was a machine, I LEFT MY NAME AND NUMBER AND WHY I WAS CALLING. But I guess that's just me. :P

JF

[edible_hat]

"I'm at home, I'm just avoiding somebody. Leave a message and if I don't call you back, it's you."

[Bright_Star]

Caller ID works even better. If a number pops up that you don't recognize then don't answer the phone. Best thing since the phone book...lol.

[Jewels]

Speaking as a former telemarketer...what happens is that your number is being automatically dialed by a machine. When the answering machine picks up, it registers as a live call and is sent to the first available telemarketer. Sometimes, if the outgoing message on the answering machine is long enough, they will be able to hear it and know to leave a message or disconnect the call. If its too short, though, all they hear is silence when they pick up.

[Reyneth]

Speaking as a former telemarketer...what happens is that your number is being automatically dialed by a machine. When the answering machine picks up, it registers as a live call and is sent to the first available telemarketer. Sometimes, if the outgoing message on the answering machine is long enough, they will be able to hear it and know to leave a message or disconnect the call. If its too short, though, all they hear is silence when they pick up.

And it leaves you sitting there, cursing the dialer.

[Lingering Grin]

Hi. This is John:
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don’t worry, I have plenty of money.

[protege]

Caller ID works even better. If a number pops up that you don't recognize then don't answer the phone.

It's also great if it's your day off (or the weekend) and you don't want to deal with your boss, an annoying ex-girlfriend, annoying relatives. etc. Not that I'd know anything about that...

[tropicsgoddess]

It's also great if it's your day off (or the weekend) and you don't want to deal with your boss, an annoying ex-girlfriend, annoying relatives. etc. Not that I'd know anything about that...

Amen to that!!!!

[Lace Neil Singer]

I wish I had a landline and could put in an amusing message on an answerphone... XD

[myswtghst]

I loved having funny outbound VM messages, but that had to stop when I got out of college. I suppose now that I'm not job-hunting and know that my sup has a sense of humor, I prolly could change it back....

[Reyneth]

I was reminded tonight at work there's one VM message I don't want to hear anymore.

The female does it like she's in a porno, keeps "accidentally" making Freudian slips of the tongue, moaning, gasping for breath and all.

I've gotten it two nights in a row. Looking down the notes of the claim, I see a coworker requested a license suspension after listening to that putridness.

Honey, it's not cute, it's not sexy, and it's going to get you in a LOT of trouble someday.

[kibbles]

What do you mean a license suspension? *Sorry if that is a stupid question, LOL!*

[Parrothead]

Hi, this is Parrothead. I can't answer the phone right now, so leave your name, number, a brief message and your favorite color of underwear. I'll call you back if I like the color.

[edible_hat]

We are Borg. You will be assimilated. But we're not home right now, so leave a message and we'll assimilate you later.

[Parrothead]

Hello. This is Ron's answering machine, Marvin, and I'm SO depressed. I have 50,000 times the memory capacity of my owner, but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name and number after the beep. Here comes the beep, God how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding.

from here