She needed it as much as I did

[Aramika]

So I went to my favorite store, Barnes and Noble, the other day.

I wanted to get a book, but I had no clue where in the store it would be. So I went up to that customer service desk thing (I'm sure those of you who work at B&N can tell me what it's actually called.).

There was a lady in front of me talking to the B&N lady.

Me: I just want a book!
SC: three guesses who this is
BL: poor lady who has to deal with SCs

SC: I need help finding a book
BL: Sure, do you have a title or author or genre in mind?
SC: Well, it's a kinda red colored book with a woman on the cover.
BL: I'm sorry, I'm going to need a little more information than that. Do you perhaps know if it is a fiction or nonfiction book?
SC: No I don't! Gah! This is why I never come here. You people are no help! walks off
BL:
Me: Erm, could you help me find a book please?
BL: Sure, still pissed because of SC What kind of book are you looking for?
Me: Pretending to Care by Norman Feuti
BL: You know the name and the author?
Me: Yeah, I'm gonna guess because of that last lady, people don't usually know that info?
BL: Yeah, pretty much.
BL looks up the book and takes me to it and hands me one.
Me: Thanks
BL then grabs another copy
Me: Erm, I only need one copy.
BL: I know, I'm gonna get one too.
Me: Yeah, I think it might do you some good.

I feel so bad for those of you who are "supposed to know" every book by its cover and picture

btw, that is an AWESOME book.

[Rappunzill]

A friend of mine used to work there, and he got some real gems:

"(The author) is dating that girl that was in that movie..."

"(The author) is about six feet tall..."
"I'm sorry sir, we don't organize the books by author height."

"It was on Oprah today!"
"Then we should have it in soon."

"I want to buy the Bible."
"Ok, what translation would you like?"
"Translation? I don't want a translation!"
"Do you speak Latin, Aramaic, and Greek?"
"No! I want it how Jesus said it--in English!"

[HawaiianShirts]

Me: Pretending to Care by Norman Feuti
BL: You know the name and the author?
Me: Yeah, I'm gonna guess because of that last lady, people don't usually know that info?
BL: Yeah, pretty much.

I get that with people coming in for computer parts. Sometimes I can figure it out if they give me some basic information like the age of the computer, but usually I need specifics or at least a model number. It's so rare that someone knows exactly what they need or comes in with a model number so I can figure out what they need that I've asked management if I can give those customers a discount. Unfortunately, there's no Making-the-Employee's-Life-Easier discount, but there should be!



...
A book by Norman Feuti?
Oooh! Please tell me that's what I think it is!

(wanders off to check Amazon)

Nope, not quite, but I'll add it to my wish list anyway.
I'm still waiting for the book collection of his "Retail" comic.

[RedRoseSpiral]

"I want to buy the Bible."
"Ok, what translation would you like?"
"Translation? I don't want a translation!"
"Do you speak Latin, Aramaic, and Greek?"
"No! I want it how Jesus said it--in English!"

I know what she wants! It's the Marijuana Bible my friend Jesus (spanish pronunciation) wrote. Doubt she'll find it in stores though.

[rae6684]

She needed it as much as I did

All librarians know that books are not shelved by title or author, or dewey or whatever classification each library uses, but colour. Patrons come in wanting the blue book, or the one that was just there last week. Title, author - hmph - librarians are all knowing and can tell exactly what book you need just by reading your mind.
Louise

[LifeCarnie]

I know what she wants! It's the Marijuana Bible my friend Jesus (spanish pronunciation) wrote. Doubt she'll find it in stores though.

Or it could be Dr. Suess. Red book, blue book. Old Book, new book.

[Sarah81]

My favorite bookstore is this little, local shop run by a couple who are, quite possibly, two of the coolest book lovers I've ever met. When I go in, the man will actually recommend books and authors because he knows what I've read and liked in the past. And more often than not, he suggests books that I really like.

But these people are not miracle workers. Or mind readers. Or God.

The last time I went in, there was a customer who...wow.

The book she was looking for had a red cover. It was a romance, she thought. Or maybe it was non-fiction. She couldn't remember. But the book was about a woman who was in love with a man. And there might have been a ranch. Maybe a man wrote the book. But a woman could have written it. And she thought that the cover could have had a woman on it.

Seriously. That's all that she had to go by. And she was actually surprised when the man who runs the place had NO IDEA of what she was talking about.

I mean...even if this shop came into the 21st century with a nice, computerized database, he still wouldn't even know where to BEGIN looking.

[TruthHurts]

Oh God those people. Back in my bookstore working days I received these gems.


SC: "Do you have the new Oprah book"
Me: "Well we're a used bookstore but we might have it. Can you tell me who the author or was or the title.
SC: "It was on Oprah, how can you not know what I'm talking about."


SC: The book was made into a movie with that actor who was on that tv show, you know who I'm talking about?

SC: I'm looking for this exercise book, it's blue and it's got a lady doing yoga on the cover.


People like to think booksellers are mind readers who will automatically know what they are looking for based on a vague description.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Me: Erm, could you help me find a book please?
BL: Sure, still pissed because of SC What kind of book are you looking for?
Me: Pretending to Care by Norman Feuti

I find your taste in reading material impeccable.

[RetailWorkhorse]

SC: "It was on Oprah, how can you not know what I'm talking about."

The Horse: I don't watch Oprah.
SC: *Head go BOOM*
The Horse:

[Pagan]

SC: Well, it's a kinda red colored book with a woman on the cover.

Why is it always a red book???!!

Me: Pretending to Care by Norman Feuti

Ooh, me have to get! My dad is always asking me if that kind crap goes on and he's amazed when I tell him it does.

"No! I want it how Jesus said it--in English!"

Which would actually have been Aramaic.

I know what she wants! It's the Marijuana Bible my friend Jesus (spanish pronunciation) wrote. Doubt she'll find it in stores though.

Chuy from the "Chelsea Handler Show" wrote a book? Cool, he's adorable!

The Horse: I don't watch Oprah.

I refuse to watch that woman's show. I can think for myself, thankyouverymuch.

[Andara Bledin]

"No! I want it how Jesus said it--in English!"

Bwahahahaha!

Just brilliant.

I've actually gone up and asked about books when I couldn't remember things I should have been able to remember. But at least I would always know the genre and at least a part of the book title. And I'd always be understanding when they couldn't find it with the lousy scraps of info I'd given them.

^-.-^

[Gurndigarn]

A book by Norman Feuti?
Oooh! Please tell me that's what I think it is!

(wanders off to check Amazon)

Nope, not quite, but I'll add it to my wish list anyway.
I'm still waiting for the book collection of his "Retail" comic.

Well, it has a fair number of his comics in it. But, honestly, I thought I was somewhat cynical and had learned how to work around corporate roadblocks... this guy has it down to a science.

[crazylegs]

I have gone into my local bookstore and asked for a book by what is on the cover, I did however know which section it was, what it was about and I asked the person who stocked that section.

They even found it for me!

[TryNotToBeThatOne]

With my oh-so-leaky memory, I have gone to the service desk to ask about a book, but with something more than book color. I'll at least have genre and a couple plot details ("um, scifi, she's traveled in time to find out that she's been made a goddess, ever heard of it?"). If I hit someone at the help desk who reads that genre, maaaaaybe they'll know what I'm talking about (I've gotten very lucky that way a time or two). If they don't read that genre, it's unlikely. Then I just slink away in shame.