Drunkards

[redmountaingoldfish]

Late Friday night (or early Saturday morning, depending on how you look at it), I was heading back to my apartment and realized that I was low on gas. So I stopped at the gas station next to where I park, figuring I have extra time now and might as well.

This gas station however is right on the edge of the university's campus, which means it was full of drunken idiots.

I go inside to pay with cash and notice that there is a long line, and it starts down an aisle near the bathrooms. So I start walking by the bathrooms to go to the end of a line when a girl stops me.

Girl: You can go back there!
Me: **Confused look***
Girl: You can go in there, there's a girl in there. **Gestures to men's room**
Me: **Realizing she's totally plastered and thinks I'm trying to go into the bathroom** I'm not trying to, I'm...
Girl: THERE'S A GIRL IN THERE!!!!!!!!
Me: I'm just walking by! **Tries to walk past but gets blocked**
Girl: YOU CAN'T GO IN!
Me: **Pushes past and gets into line**

I have to wait a couple of minutes to pay and all throughout she still saying things directed at me like:

You'll have to wait!
She'll be out, you'll have to wait!
There's a girl in there!

I gave the cashier a parting "I feel sorry for you" look as I left with the girl still yelling at me.

Some peoples children...

[donruss]

Somewhere there is a village missing its idiot!

[Geek King]

I would have played with her. I can't help it, I like to mess with drunken minds. For someone that drunk, I'd have gone with, "No, she can't be in there. Its the men's room, and she's a girl. Why is she in there? I'm a man, so I should be in there." Then watch as the neurons slowly sizzle trying to come up with the answer.

PS-I know there is probably a good reason. Like I said, I like to punish drunk people for inflicting themselves on me. Faulty logic is best, as they're usually too fuddled to figure out why its wrong, but somehow know that it is. I score myself at a point per minute they spend in mental anguish. My best is 33 points from my Heisenberg Principle of Beer* question. Non-drunks just laugh, drunks try to figure it out, or in one case, try to lick the bottom of the mug/stine/glass to get the last few drops out.

*Is the reason there is always some beer left at the bottom of the mug because some of the beer is moving to fast for your lips to catch it?"

[Kogarashi]

I love Jeff Foxworthy's bit about ways to have fun when you're stuck as the designated driver for a group of friends (in my case, that would be all the time, if I even actually had friends who drink). Stuff like dropping them off at their boss's house when you claim to take them home, or stopping at every gas station between the bar and their homes and charging them for a full tank every time.

[PepperElf]

i hope that girl had a designated driver!
she sounds like she was too drunk to even read a book safely