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  • Because TheHippie likes these stories

    yet more of my Salt Lake Horror Stories

    the intersection with the most asshatry
    ok, I am thoroughly convinced that North Temple and Redwood Road is the intersection with more asshatry than any other intersection in the city. In the last week I have seen people blatantly run red lights... I don't mean it just turned, I mean it was red as they approached and they didn't even slow down as they blew through the intersection, I almost daily will have someone in the leftmost turn lane try to get into the Chevron on the right hand side of the road right after the left hand turn onto North Temple (am I the only person who gets in the turn lane that actually corresponds to the lane I am going into)... oh and on North Temple I see people turning out of the middle lane into stores on the right hand sign (I've even seen cops do it... without signally what they are doing of course). Oh and people turning right think that "right turn yield on red" means, "go on ahead, the through traffic will make way for you"

    more UTA stories
    First, I'm going to hell because I think the fact that the automatic stop announcement system that they've installed on the buses sound like Steven Hawking is HILARIOUS.
    oh and the stories... thanks to UTA I have seen my first whore, I came to my stop to wait to get on the bus, this lady who seriously looked like a whore came up and asked me when the bus would be coming... I checked the time and said "looks like it should be here in about 5 minutes" her response was "fuck, well I'll never use UTA again, this schedule is just so inconvenient"... ok, so the bus is exactly on time, but that isn't acceptable because he didn't get there exactly when you got to the stop... ok psycho lady (oh and the bus comes every 15 minutes, so not that inconvenient)... and here's the part that pisses me off, she got on the bus and told the driver "I didn't even bring fare money with me... I'm only going 3 blocks so I don't think I should have to pay"... and the pisser... the driver actually let her ride for free
    Oh, something else I learned on UTA... apparently kids still think it is funny to talk like robots... saying the most redundant and useless things (thank you for repeating what the announcement just told us about being at the Meadowbrook Trax station... between that announcement and the fact that I can see the station I would of had no idea where I was if you hadn't just told me again).
    Oh and kinda sad commentary, did you know that greyhound now hand checks all bags? Yup I found that out during my 40 minute layover at Salt Lake Central because the UTA trip planner sucks and got me there earlier than I needed to get the bus out to the hotel... though I must say, looking at the artist renderings of what the Salt Lake Central Station will eventually look like when all of the construction is done looks really cool.

    jackasses in my own neighborhood

    seriously, if you can't afford to rent a storage space for a boat you cant afford a boat... some douchewaffle has been parking his boat on the side of the street in front of the condo complex... this pisses me off because there isn't enough parking for the residents, much less some douche who thinks he can get free parking for his boat.

    Oh and to the people who will complain about how slow service is at Astro Burger... all of you can go to hell, the owner there is the coolest guy ever and he has the attitude that he'd rather do it right than fast... you don't go to Astro for the quickest service, you go there for the high quality of food and service... you want fast, go to the next stoplight, either north or south, doesn't matter, turn to the west, and there will be a McDonalds a few blocks down on the right hand sign... they will be more than happy to give you something quick.

    I'm sure I have more... but I've got to get back to work... maybe I'll add more later after I've finished delivering the guest folios.
    If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

  • #2
    hey smiley, wanna hear the strangest thing I've ever seen? Take 7th east from southtemple to where it turns into van winkle, and count how many mcdonalds you see.... there's only ONE... and it's one 3rd south... it's crazy.
    Carpe Jugulum : Go for the throat.

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    • #3
      Quoth Fenrus View Post
      hey smiley, wanna hear the strangest thing I've ever seen? Take 7th east from southtemple to where it turns into van winkle, and count how many mcdonalds you see.... there's only ONE... and it's one 3rd south... it's crazy.
      for those outside of Utah, Fenrus is referring to the fact that McDonalds in Salt Lake are like Starbucks in Seattle... seriously, we have places where there are 2 McDonalds in the same f-ing parking lot.
      If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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      • #4
        Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
        and here's the part that pisses me off, she got on the bus and told the driver "I didn't even bring fare money with me... I'm only going 3 blocks so I don't think I should have to pay"... and the pisser... the driver actually let her ride for free
        So it's impossible to walk three blocks now?
        The Case of the Missing Mandrake; A Jude Derry, Sorceress Sleuth Mystery Available on Amazon.

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        • #5
          Quoth Stormraven View Post
          So it's impossible to walk three blocks now?
          Smiley did say she looked like a hooker, I assume this includes hooker boots, and I wouldn't walk three blocks in those either.
          The High Priest is an Illusion!

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          • #6
            Attach a printout picture of a limpet mine to the side of the boat. Just to add a little surreal quality to an otherwise irritating sight
            "Joi's CEO is about as sneaky and subtle as a two year old on crack driving an air craft carrier down Broadway." - Broomjockey

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            • #7
              And you want me to go to Salt Lake for WHAT REASON again??

              *twitches*
              Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

              Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

              Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

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              • #8
                Quoth Evil Queen View Post
                And you want me to go to Salt Lake for WHAT REASON again??

                *twitches*
                yes, but think of how much worse it could be... you could be in hell... oh wait
                If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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                • #9
                  Psh. I'm the Dominator of Hell. Hell bows down to me and licks my boots.

                  Salt Lake City is the bratty step-child.
                  Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

                  Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

                  Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Then that's why we want you here! You can beat around the bratty stepchild and take away her toys... yeah... that's it.
                    Carpe Jugulum : Go for the throat.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I lived in SLC back in '99 for about 5 months.. good times.. unfortunately I couldn't afford to live there anymore and had to move back to St. Louis

                      Oh well, I was 19 and irresponsible back then.

                      Thank you for describing some of the things that go on in the city... I miss SLC and would like to go back there someday.. granted I can get a decent job there doing something similar to what I'm doing at about the same payrate.

                      That and I'd get to visit my brother.. he lives out there.
                      Fixing problems... one broken customer at a time.

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Blade_Raver View Post
                        I lived in SLC back in '99 for about 5 months.. good times.. unfortunately I couldn't afford to live there anymore and had to move back to St. Louis

                        Oh well, I was 19 and irresponsible back then.

                        Thank you for describing some of the things that go on in the city... I miss SLC and would like to go back there someday.. granted I can get a decent job there doing something similar to what I'm doing at about the same payrate.

                        That and I'd get to visit my brother.. he lives out there.
                        and we'd be able to increase our representation in CS.com...

                        and one of these days I'll have to post a sightings on all of the cool things that I've seen.
                        If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth Evil Queen View Post
                          And you want me to go to Salt Lake for WHAT REASON again??

                          *twitches*
                          you can come here to mesa, or tempe, or chandler, or gilbert or scotsdale... since they are all interconnected...
                          the crazies just drink a whole lot and its 93-130 in the summer....
                          ... and well.. its not hell yet...

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                            more UTA stories
                            First, I'm going to hell because I think the fact that the automatic stop announcement system that they've installed on the buses sound like Steven Hawking is HILARIOUS.

                            oh and the stories... thanks to UTA I have seen my first whore, I came to my stop to wait to get on the bus, this lady who seriously looked like a whore came up and asked me when the bus would be coming... I checked the time and said "looks like it should be here in about 5 minutes" her response was "fuck, well I'll never use UTA again, this schedule is just so inconvenient"... ok, so the bus is exactly on time, but that isn't acceptable because he didn't get there exactly when you got to the stop... ok psycho lady (oh and the bus comes every 15 minutes, so not that inconvenient)... and here's the part that pisses me off, she got on the bus and told the driver "I didn't even bring fare money with me... I'm only going 3 blocks so I don't think I should have to pay"... and the pisser... the driver actually let her ride for free
                            If you're going to Hell after finding the computerized voices amusing, I'll be there right along with you. I actually laughed out loud at one the other day when it reminded me to "col-LECT your be-LONG-ings when you EXitthebus."

                            And as to the woman you described--I'm really surprised no one else has said this yet--I guess we can say that she's taking the "Entitlement Whore" role a little too literally, huh?
                            I suspect that... inside every adult (sometimes not very far inside) is a bratty kid who wants everything his own way.
                            - Bill Watterson

                            My co-workers: They're there when they need me.
                            - IPF

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              [QUOTE
                              more UTA stories
                              First, I'm going to hell because I think the fact that the automatic stop announcement system that they've installed on the buses sound like Stephen Hawking is HILARIOUS.
                              [/QUOTE]

                              Have you checked out MC Hawking? Physics and gangsta rap music with the same voice as Stephen:
                              http://soundclick.com/share?songid=631986
                              "What did you have for breakfast this morning? Carnation Instant Bitch?"
                              -Eric Foreman That 70's Show

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