Quoth wanderingjoe72
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Mind your own darn business, tutty!
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Quoth RetailWorkhorse View PostThat would probably be the point I'd pull out a big cigar and start smoking that instead of the little cigarillos.
*Grabs a cigar and smokes*
Now I need a brandy.PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.
There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!
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Quoth Jay 2K Winger View PostNah, just hold a glass of scotch and talk about the time you got thrown out of a bar in New York City.
Would you believe I was actually thrown out of a gay bar in New York City? I remember it like it was yesterday, actually I think it was. I was coming down off this sugar coma that I just HAD to get my hands on and I found myself walking along the streets looking for the best lay I've ever had when this really hot-
*yadayadayada, bullshit, something about a jealous lover, the DJ had the hots for the dude I was dancing with, take your pick*
Oh, am I done? FABulous, now I need some tea and some hardcore yaoi anime.Now a member of that alien race called Management.
Yeah, you see that right. Pink. Harness.
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Quoth wagegoth View PostSame kind of person who tells someone overweight, ... Or, just, "You know, you REALLY SHOULD lose some weight."
This, for reference, was one of those scrawny little guys about the height of a smallish female, who thought he was god's gift to women because he confused 'skinny' with 'lean'. He was also a total dick and cordially loathed by the rest of the crew... probably using his ego to compensate for his height or something... while I, by contrast, am about 6'5" (~195cm) and 380 lbs (~172kg, or 27 stone), with a build that has been compared, variously, to a linebacker, a light-weight sumo, and a scaled-down Andre the Giant.
My reply to him?
"Yeah, maybe, but at least I weigh more than the meat I just stocked,"...WHY DO YOU TEMPT WHAT LITTLE FAITH IN HUMANITY I HAVE!?! -- Kalga
And I want a pony for Christmas but neither of us is getting what we want OK! What you are asking is impossible. -- Wicked Lexi
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Quoth TheComputerError View PostIntruder: "Smoking kills, you know."
Me: "Maybe I'm doing the world a favor."
Intruder: "Smoking's bad for you."
Me: *looks at cigarette in shock* "HOW'D THIS GET HERE?!" *continues smoking*
Me: What happened to the Rum?
^ Not true but I got it once. What an idjit.
Intruder: Smoking takes years off your life.
Me: It's all an elaborate rouse to get away from you.
Intruder: ZOMG, you smoke? EWwwww!
Me: *blows smoke at intruder*Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester
Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z
Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart
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aaaaaaaand thanks to my choice of clothing I never seem to get this, mainly because I started smoking in late '99 (wow I started when I was legal to actually BUY my own) something about trenchcoats just seems to make people go *DO NOT TUT*
I guess I'm lucky.
though a line I'd love is, really, they do, but then doesn't too much Dihydrogen Monoxide kill you as well?
Mmmmmmm Dihydrogen Monoxide + Carbon Dioxide +artificial flavors and colors +other chemicals.....in 2 liter form.
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Trench coats, huh?
Can I use that Dihydrogen Monoxide line?Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester
Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z
Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart
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Sure EQ, but uhm, I kinda stole it from P&T, because remember Dihydrogen Monoxide is a dangerous chemical that once it gets into the water supply never gets out, and can cause excessive sweating, frequent urination, and problems with electrolytes in the body.
have I ever said how much I love talking with some of the far left libs up here with that (and before it goes into fratching, I'm one of those, but I'm also one of those folks who thinks it's fun to be contrarian. I am also a self proclaimed @$$hole, and like Dr. Dennis Leary, proud of it.)
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Quoth Pagan View PostWhy is the rum always gone?Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester
Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z
Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart
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Quoth Evil Queen View PostClearly someone is beating us to it. We must find them and juice them for they must be saturated with Rummy Goodness by now.
oh and fueling Captain Jack Sparrow, and no doubt Captain Teage, though I think he has everything else in his system until he gets a new transfusion.
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Quoth bunnyboy View Postaaaaaaaand thanks to my choice of clothing I never seem to get this, mainly because I started smoking in late '99 (wow I started when I was legal to actually BUY my own) something about trenchcoats just seems to make people go *DO NOT TUT*
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