(Dis)R-E-S-P-E-C-T

[BethB]

I was at work doing some rearranging that the "geniuses" in management wanted done when an older lady, her daughter, and grandkids came strolling by. The older lady wanted some film and grabbed a disposable camera. daughter starts off by screeching she shouldn't have grabbed the camera like she was one of her children. Lady then sees the batteries and is reminded that she needs some rechargables for her digital camera. daughter says "you don't need those. you can use regular batteries like we do" but in a condescending voice. If I were to speak to my mother in that voice, she would have smacked me regardless of how old i am. They were only there for a few minutes but her daughter would not stop making her mother feel and look stupid. It bugged me to no end and wishing I could scream at her to stop treating her mother like a child.

I also had a job as a cashier at a restaurant and a regular customer and her daughter and grandson would come in every Fri and Sat night and daughter would constantly just tell her mother to shut up, stop being so stupid, ect. You have no idea how badly I wished mom would yank on her too tight on her head ponytail and smack her face. Moms put up with enough crap from their kids when they are younger but to continue it as adults. Uh...no! I wouldn't even think of speaking to my mom like that.

Sorry, I just find it disrespectful in all ways and not just because I'm a mom. I just feel that to put someone down who took care of you when sick, clothed, and fed you for years as best as they could is just plain mean.

Rant/sighting done. thanks for reading

[Pairou]

I've been known to snap at my acquaintances for doing that... not in front of their parents, but I have.

I've never ONCE talked to my mother (or father) as though I were oh-so-much-better. How dumb is that?

[Gerrinson]

I know it comes across as blaming the victim, but these situations are usually the fault of the parents to begin with. Bad parenting = bad kids. Bad kids (generally) turn into bad adults.

Even now, if I got out of line with my parents like that my dad would threaten to pull my pants down and give me a spanking in the middle of the store. Which would be even more embarassing for a guy in his 30s than for a kid under 10.

[morgana]

I do sometimes talk to my mother like she's six. "No, Mom, you don't need that. No, Mom, you already have one of those. No, Mom, we aren't buying that today." But I don't yell at her, and I talk gently, and I reason with her. As much as you *can* reason with a six-year-old. And I sometimes wonder if I sound like a bad daughter.

My mother has Alzheimers.

Those daughters *do* sound like brats.

[Seshat]

Yes, but there's a huge difference between caring for someone with a mental disability and being disrespectful of an (apparently) perfectly able parent.

Seeing someone gently/firmly saying 'No, we're not doing this today' is waaay different from screeching or condescending.

[blas]

Off topic here, but Seshat, I have missed you!

Back on topic....I didn't dare ever tell my mother to shut up growing up. The best I'd be able to wish for had I done that would have been a closed casket funeral.

[depechemodefan]

My mom has a friend name "June". June has 3 daughters. The youngest is always scolding her mom or acting embarressed by her. For ex., we go to church one day together and June was singing, like everyone else. She's not a proffesional singer but neither is she a screecher. He daughter acted embarrassed, nagged her mom to stop singing.

I don't know why June puts up with it.

But the daughter always acts like a know-it-all.

[tollbaby]

My son did that to me exactly ONCE (he's about to turn ten, and full of attitude these days). He yelled at me condescendingly about something in public, and I gave him a smack. He was pretty shocked, I looked at him and said, "Okay, now that you're done yelling, I am willing to listen, and you will speak to me respectfully - agreed?" Rest of the conversation was no problem and he behaved after that. He apologized for being snotty, and I apologized for hitting him, and everything was good.

He's never done it again - and I don't care if we're not supposed to hit our children, sometimes it's the only way to get through (and I only do it VEEERRRRYYY occasionally when there's no other alternative, I'm not a child abuser). My kids understand that if they feel my hand on their bottom, it's because they've crossed the line and they'd better figure out how to get back over onto the right side of it (and they're usually pretty accomodating in that respect - I do have very well-behaved children - most of the time).

[Bright_Star]

I'm 44 years old & I don't dare talk nasty to my mother or father. They wouldn't hesitate to smack me upside my head if I did. I was raised to respect my parents. BUT nowadays you see far too many kids talk back to their parents that was unheard of even 20 years ago. & what's sadder is that these kids get away with it. I mean...what up with that??

[Seshat]

Off topic here, but Seshat, I have missed you!

Awwww. That's sweet. Thank you.

[BethB]

What bugged me most was the tone of it all. The way it's said. I can make some sarcastic remarks to my mom and she knows I'm joking(mostly because she knows she just had an "d'oh!" moment) but I would never ridicule her or make her look or feel stupid. If she wants something I'll give my opinion and opposing view and say "it's your call. and your money."

[Jack7957]

My mother has Alzheimers.

My mother-in-law does to. She's forgotten who I am.