Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Tuesday From Hell...

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Tuesday From Hell...

    Boy, was I glad to just get into bed and at least get 7 good hours where no more bad things could happen until I had to get up and drive in the slop tonight and go to work.

    Every day on my way home, I fear for my life. The morning commute is nothing short of suicide for me, and homicide for others. I swear, every morning, people are late for work or just so self important that they have to drive worse than drunken twacked out maniacs on meth! I HATE driving home Monday-Thursday mornings. At least on Friday, after I get my laundry done, it's later morning, but before lunch, so the freeway is a lot less busy.

    Anyway, the start of the trip.

    I'm a few miles into my journey home. There is a Wal-Mart one stop light before the entrance to the freeway. This stupid cow in a van had been following me ever since leaving my parents' house....well, tailgating, not following. Did it even occur to her that temperatures were flirting with the freezing mark and that it was sleeting? Nope. She was on my ass. Then she was weaving in and out of traffic once we got on the highway. Then when the other lane was too plugged to move her ginormous van over, she got behind me again and pressed her van so close that I could see every detail of her ugly fuming face in my rear view mirror. I swear she was hyperventalating.

    Now, back to Wal-Mart. She continues her dangerous tailgating as we turn onto the next highway, and the very second the right turn lane to go into Wal-Mart appears, she cranks that wheel and proceeds to rocket past me. She took the turn into Wal-Mart so wide that she nearly clipped the entire driver's side off of the small car exiting Wal-Mart on the service road.

    Now let's fast forward to where I've been on the freeway, now I'm ready to exit and get closer to home.

    I get in the exit lane. As is most days with morning rush hour, that exit is clogged like a toilet full of paper towel because EVERYONE has to take that exit. The car behind me tailgated me the entire time on the off ramp until I got to the big clog. Did you not notice that there is a HUGE logjam up ahead? Fucking moron trying to push me to go faster when there's a huge jam ahead.

    Now I get to the stop sign at the end of the exit, with that idiot still behind me. I'm used to this....people late for work so they will push push push for people to take the off ramp at 75 mph and expect people to blow the stop sign at the end. There were people coming, so I had to wait before I could turn right.

    Now where I turn right, there are 4 lanes......I need to be in the furthest left lane....so when I turn right, I make sure NO ONE is coming and I hop right into that left most lane because my next turn is at the very next stop light. (Isn't that nice?)

    So I can finally turn right, and I'm turning, and the idiot behind me actually whips it and tries to get ahead of me (this is called "One Upping". When someone behind you gets mad at how "slow" you are so they one up you and then you have to quick decide if you're going to take a chance or just wait your turn to get back in your place). I take a chance and put that moron in their place. Of course, I get viciously honked at, and then the moron proceeds to whip it into the other lane, then rocket past me, then get ahead of me.

    The deal breaker of it all? The moron had a Jesus fish decal on the back of their car. Nice driving self contradiction. I'm sure Jesus loves it when you drive like you're the most important person on the road.

    Now let's fast forward to a while later. I got home, took my makeup off, cleaned up, went tanning, and it's now 8:50 AM leaving the tanning salon. Every Tuesday I go to Subway, it's just a stupid tradition like every Friday I go to McDonalds....can't really explain it.

    Anyway, drive past Subway......20 minutes after it's supposed to be open......no lights on, no cars in the parking lot......great. So I swallowed my pride and drove to the Subway in my city's Wal-Mart a couple of miles out of the way.

    Then I get home and have to make an appointment for my shot. I call the clinic and the receptionist says in a very snotty way, "I'm sorry but we've changed the way we do things around here, if you want to make an appointment for THAT kind of thing, you need to call your doctor and make an appointment with one of her nurses." That kind of thing? So she took my info and said a nurse would call me back right away.

    Three hours later right away. So what do the receptionists do now? I thought their job was to make appointments? Oh well, maybe I'm just being presumptuous and rude.

    What a great morning.

    Then on the news tonight, I find out that my employer is firing all the temps and cutting full time hours down to 4 day weeks. Great.
    You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

  • #2
    Ugh. Sounds like you drive the same roads I do!

    I was in the fast lane, having pulled-ahead of a line of slow traffic, when I attempted to merge back to the right to make my exit. I'm a pretty over-cautious person, so I had several car lengths behind me to the vehicle in the right lane. I put my turn signal on, speed-up a little bit to be sure ( I tend to let off the gas when I change lanes; bad habit), and began to pull over. Suddenly, the Twatwaffle that was behind me is right beside me! Grinning at me through his window while his girlfriend/wife/cow appeared to be laughing maniacally next to him. He fell behind and I started to change lanes again. He got right beside me again. I just let-off the gas and pulled-in behind him; if he thought I was going to get angry and race, he was wrong. I'm sure karma will catch-up with him faster than I will
    "If anyone wants this old box containing the broken bits of my former faith in humanity, I'll take your best offer now. You may be able to salvage a few of em' for parts..... " - Quote by Argabarga

    Comment


    • #3
      Well, duh! These are Wisconsin drivers we're talking about! Unless Minnesota is vomiting forth some of its idiots down blas' route home.

      I do seem to remember being told Johnny Carson once said the worst drivers in the United States were in Wisconsin. If true, I don't doubt him one bit.
      Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

      "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

      Comment


      • #4
        We have the Bright Lights Butthead... Every other morning or so, he ends up behind me, with his high beams on, tailgating his car into my car's hind end. The problem is, it's a regular 2-lane road. No passing lane. 35mph speed limit. An entire line of cars, only able to be in one lane, all going to the highway in the morning on this little road.

        I have no idea where he expects me, or the other cars, to go. I keep hoping that the cop who occasionally sits in a little off-road area will catch the bugger doing it.

        Oddly enough, the jerk keeps his brights on, even when we all get to the highway. Once we get there, he drives slow in the fast lane, with his brights on, aggravating any cars ahead of him. He's a twatwaffle (LOVE that word).

        Comment


        • #5
          I definetly agree, Irv.

          Although the funny thing is, looking back on it, I was more upset that Subway still wasn't open yet and that the receptionist was such a bitch.
          You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
            Well, duh! These are Wisconsin drivers we're talking about! Unless Minnesota is vomiting forth some of its idiots down blas' route home.

            I do seem to remember being told Johnny Carson once said the worst drivers in the United States were in Wisconsin. If true, I don't doubt him one bit.
            welcome to my world every night I work/deliver. I swear if people see a lighted delivery sign they loose what little driving skill they have and just purposely try and fuck with me. either that or call in to our store to "complain" about the "bad driving" pizza guy

            GET A FRAKIN life
            I'm lost without a paddle and headed up SH*T creek.
            -- Life Sucks Then You Die.


            "I'll believe corp. are people when Texas executes one."

            Comment


            • #7
              Racket Man, I dated a Dominos boy a few years back. One time, someone from a trailer park complained to his manager that he drove erratically when he delivered their food and he "burned rubber" and his car kicked rocks at their trailer and vehicles.

              Good thing his manager was his friend and roommate, because he just listened to the complaint and apologized and hung up. What a bunch of liars.
              You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

              Comment


              • #8
                i laugh when other drivers try to tailgate to intimidate you into driving faster.

                i just turn up my audiobook and ignore them. sometimes i even slow down a little.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth PepperElf View Post
                  i laugh when other drivers try to tailgate to intimidate you into driving faster.
                  Cruise control is my best friend.
                  I'm bringing disdain back...with a vengeance.

                  Oh, and your tool box called...you got out again.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Ahhh tailgaters.

                    *A little background: I'm a stocky guy, reasonable height, some muscle, long hair and look like a grumpy bastard. My guitar player is about 2" taller, dark skinned and muscular*

                    So some twatwaffle is sitting on our ass as we drive to pick up some gear. Naturally my guitar player taps the breaks, causing twatwaffle to break suddenly (smoke and everything...). So he pulls up tight next to us, then past us until we hit a red light. He starts hurling abuse, so me and guitar player decide to mess with him. We get out of the car....and Twatwaffle suddenly loses all his toughguy points...
                    How ever do they manage to breathe for themselves without having to call tech support? - Argabarga

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      One of these days, I am not going to have kids in my car when one of those twatwaffles (I, too, love that word) gets behind me. My van needs a new paint job anyway.

                      "But, officer, I thought I saw a squirrel/puppy/little kid in the road, I had to slam on my breaks! Thank goodness it was a false alarm, too bad that guy was following me so close."

                      "You mean you don’t have the one piece of information you actually need? Well, stick your grubby paws in the crayon box, yank one out and colour me Fucking Shocked Fuchsia." - Gravekeeper

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X