Wherein I am seen eating pork. (2 bonus episodes inside)

[Mr Hero]

What about bacon? Ham? Pork chops?
I was at one of my regular Subways on Saturday before I had to work. I was about to sit down and eat my sandwich when a lady calls over to me.

SC: I saw you put bacon on that and now you're going to EAT it?

Note: There was no bacon, but there was ham.

Yes, lady. I'm going to get swine flu for eating this sandwich. But since there's turkey and roast beef I'm also going to get bird flu and mad cow disease. You know what? I'm going to ask the worker if he'll put soy sauce on this as well.

'Wherein a friend overhears me telling me that story to my brother.
Just a little background about my friend. In his shoes his toes are busted. His kitchen says his bread is molded. Got a good job at the dollar store. Well ok none of that's true but the dollar store part.

He was telling me how he's selling out of sawdust masks. These are masks that don't really prevent germs, but if you're trying to keep sawdust away, they're great.

Another one rides the bus

The way our buses are set up is there's a front door where you get on and pay or get off. The back door is for exits only. You can probably see where this is going.

As I get off the bus out the back door, two girls get on and take a seat in the back. I didn't say anything but I really should have.

[Kogarashi]

[B]SC: I saw you put bacon on that and now you're going to EAT it?

My response: Yep! ::bright, cheerful grin::

[crashhelmet]

Yes, lady. I'm going to get swine flu for eating this sandwich. But since there's turkey and roast beef I'm also going to get bird flu and mad cow disease. You know what? I'm going to ask the worker if he'll put soy sauce on this as well.

That would be classic pwnage right there.

In his shoes his toes are busted. His kitchen says his bread is molded. Got a good job at the dollar store.

Has he seen better days or been the star of many plays?

CH

[mariamousie1]

Mmmmm...bacon. I'm trying to lose a little weight at the moment, so I've been trying to stay away from it though. Yum though.

[fireheart]

Gotta love the swine flu paranoid people.

Haven't seen much bar more people buying rubber gloves, no facemasks though-we don't sell them. Me? Until we get an actual death in SA, then I'll start freaking out.

One thing that really makes me laugh though is that my work sells all kinds of meat. So does the butcher nearby. None of them have reported a severe drop in any pig meat (bacon, ham or pork). I don't particularly like pork either.

[Sliceanddice]

see the lady in the first part is why when i first saw swine flu on the news i looked at my mom and said 'those people talking about how we dont need the swine flu arent that smart are they? i promise you i will here a story or two in th enext two weeks about business being up in so and so store or state or city because of swine flu did this or that" she laughed and a week later the news was talking about how cali and west coast port citys are getting a boost in their economy from cuises not going to mexico and stoping there instead.
i looked at my mom and said 'told you so, it happend every time'

[Sheldonrs]

[B]...SC: I saw you put bacon on that and now you're going to EAT it?...

Yes. Every night I have to bathe in the blood of young virgins and catching them sure works up an appetite.

[PepperElf]

Transmission of swine influenza virus from pigs to humans is not common and properly cooked pork poses no risk of infection.

but i've been told irrational fear will cause EVERYTHING around you to infect you with swine flu. Even reading these words will infect you!

muahahahaha
yes i'm that evil

[MannersMakethMan]

SC: I saw you put bacon on that and now you're going to EAT it?

No, I'm going to post it to Outer Mongolia to test the Post Office's delivery efficiency.

[Red_Dazes]

SC: I saw you put bacon on that and now you're going to EAT it?

But I *cough* love *sneeze* bacon ma'am *hack hack hack* *watch the looks of horror fill the room* ...ah yes... paranoia is my friend.

Gotta love the swine flu paranoid people.

Haven't seen much bar more people buying rubber gloves, no facemasks though-we don't sell them. Me? Until we get an actual death in SA, then I'll start freaking out.

.

Our LP had some ladies come in the other day (the story was told to me) They walked in and were talking about the Swine Flue and how awful it was ETC. So one of our LP guys started coughing and sneezing. And these ladies went white as sheets and almost ran the other way. He got a good laugh out of it.

Also..... for your enjoyment.

[bainsidhe]

When I read the sandwich story, my first thought was "I bet a lot of bacon-lovers will be commenting on this post ". Why is it that swine flu never even occured to me

[nhollywood]

What is so funny is that this flu has nothing to do with swine (except for the name).

[Gawdzillers]

Just a little background about my friend. In his shoes his toes are busted. His kitchen says his bread is molded. Got a good job at the dollar store.

Is his name Citizen King?

[Andara Bledin]

As I get off the bus out the back door, two girls get on and take a seat in the back. I didn't say anything but I really should have.

If that had been me getting off the bus, there's no chance in hell they'd have gotten on.

Hell, I managed to get one of the psychos (he talks big, but it's all fake), to stop threatening me and go back to threatening the bus driver instead. She knew he was a big fake, too. He just tries to sound scary crazy; he somehow thinks he'll get stuff from it, like free bus rides.

^-.-^

[Difdi]

Unless you're eating the bacon raw, you're in far greater danger of trichinosis than swine flu. People get crazy about the weirdest things, but even at their craziest, they rarely actually do anything effective.

The people wearing dust masks and procedure masks out of fear of the flu are a good example. Unless you're strapping on an N100 (or P100) mask, it's just a placebo. And even then, that only helps against airborne pathogens that must be inhaled to be infectious.