I Don't Work Here!

[RestaurantDude]

Hi everyone!

I was down at the local home improvement / hardware store the other day, looking for more Christmas lights (which, on the 4th Dec is like looking for ice water in the desert). Anywhoo... As i strolled the seasonal isle, browsing the rather dismal selection of twinkly lights and shiny things, a woman walked up to me and started asking me where she could find stuff.

ME: Well, me, obviously.
FW: Frumpy Woman

FW: Excuse me, do you know where i can find this? [thrusts holiday flyer in my face]
ME: Um... i really don't know. I'd think it would be here in the seasonal isle, but i haven't seen it.
FW: hmpfh [wanders off]

(i made a critical error there in trying to help a fellow human being, as now she won't leave me the **** alone!)

FW: Could you help me find (some other item)?
ME: Sorry, i don't work here, so, i don't know where that would be
FW: Well, you should know where it is! Do they even train people before they hire them here!? Who is your manager?

Ok, i'm done with being polite at this point.

ME: Listen lady, i don't work here. i can't help you. i am just here to do MY SHOPPING!
FW: I just need help finding (item)! You aren't being very helpful. (she is following me around at this point, asking me about where to find stuff)
ME: JEEZ... STOP FOLLWING ME... I DON'T FRELLING WORK HERE!!!!
FW: ... well... why didn't you say that in the first place?
ME:

I should point out that the uniform at this particular store is made up of, among other things, a bright blue apron with the stores logo across the entire front of it. I was wearing blue jeans and a lime green shirt. Do i need to start carrying around one of these as well?

[Magpie]

Do i need to start carrying around one of these as well?

Haven't we already established that SC's don't/can't/won't read signs?

[lordlundar]

(i made a critical error there in trying to help a fellow human being, as now she won't leave me the **** alone!)

Now you see, there's your problem. You assumed she's a human being.

[RestaurantDude]

Now you see, there's your problem. You assumed she's a human being.

Good point.

[Midorikawa]

I dunno...I've been mistaken for an employee at computer stores before, but that's probably because I used to spend hours a day there sometimes getting stuff for customers who just couldn't wait for me to back order it. (small, new company with no back stock due to no cash flow...:-P)

I think I've been offered jobs at <now long gone computer store> more than once because I made big sales when the sales people couldn't seem to.

[Amina516]

Id offer you this shirt : http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts-app...trations/38e2/

But they wouldnt read it anyways.

[Midorikawa]

Id offer you this shirt : http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts-app...trations/38e2/

But they wouldnt read it anyways.

I think that's the one thinkgeek shirt I don't already own. I'm wearing http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts-apparel/unisex/8f52/ this one today in fact. :-D

[LadyAndreca]

Heh. After working a few months in the Orange Apron, I was shopping at another store and was looking through their tool section for an infrared thermometer, because the ones I found at Orange Apron weren't quite what I wanted. (Needed one that could read at least 325 C, but the inexpensive one only read 310 C, and the better one was more than I wanted to spend.) Apparently despite NOT wearing a dark blue polo and black pants--in fact, I was wearing a baby blue winter jacket and blue jeans--I had too much of a 'female who knows about tools' look. Therefore, I MUST work there, and I had a guy calling from way down the aisle asking me where to find things.

At least I was saved fairly quickly by someone who DID work there. "Take 35 to 36, turn into the second shopping center, go into the Orange Apron, and head to Aisle 12" would probably not be the answer they wanted.