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A few years back right at this time of year I was in Wal-fart standing in a long line, buying presents for my neice and nephew. There was this very young couple with two small children in front of me. I swear the girl couldn't have been more than 18 or so, she had one baby maybe 6-8 months and a two year old boy sitting in the cart. Someone up at the front of the line was taking a REALLLLLY long time wanting prices checked and discounts verified and basically being a boob. The Dad looked maybe 20, and was all ghettoed out, looked like a "wigga". Very white, very skinny and filthy-mouthed, both he and his woman dressed 'ghetto fabulous' style. She was wearing way too much makeup and had her hair all ratted up on top of her head. Dad starts throwing a tantrum. I mean a real tantrum, jumping up and down and beating his fists on the counter and yelling I could lay a mattress down right here and take a f#%^& nap! Hurry up! I gots places to be! I gots kids need feedin!! etc etc. Quite funny.
The girl looked really embarrassed but fearful of him. So I distracted them by playing with the toddler. I stuck my tongue out at him and he was fascinated, so I kept doing it. Everytime he'd look at me, I'd stick my tongue out and then look away real quick. He thought this was hilarious and started laughing and wouldn't stop staring at me, sticking his tongue out back. His parents noticed and thought it was funny. They were like He's flirting with you! and I'd start laughing. Then the kid started staring at me until I looked at him, and then he'd let the pacifier fall out of his mouth (yeah, I know, a 2 year old with a pacifier.
) which was even more hilarious and we'd all start laughing. It kept the dude quiet until the boob at the head of the line finally walked away. But even then he had to yell after her Geez lady! Finally! I thought I was gonna grow old and die over here!!!
A while later I was in hobby lobby down the street (not a very big town) and realized the Mom was at the register checking me out. She remembered me---she says I remember you, my son was flirting with you in Wal-mart. She very specifically said thank you to me as I left. I think she knew what I was doing.
The girl looked really embarrassed but fearful of him. So I distracted them by playing with the toddler. I stuck my tongue out at him and he was fascinated, so I kept doing it. Everytime he'd look at me, I'd stick my tongue out and then look away real quick. He thought this was hilarious and started laughing and wouldn't stop staring at me, sticking his tongue out back. His parents noticed and thought it was funny. They were like He's flirting with you! and I'd start laughing. Then the kid started staring at me until I looked at him, and then he'd let the pacifier fall out of his mouth (yeah, I know, a 2 year old with a pacifier.
) which was even more hilarious and we'd all start laughing. It kept the dude quiet until the boob at the head of the line finally walked away. But even then he had to yell after her Geez lady! Finally! I thought I was gonna grow old and die over here!!! A while later I was in hobby lobby down the street (not a very big town) and realized the Mom was at the register checking me out. She remembered me---she says I remember you, my son was flirting with you in Wal-mart. She very specifically said thank you to me as I left. I think she knew what I was doing.
I always enjoy gently joking around with little ones and their parents in line, especially if it's a long line or there's a delay (and if the parents are okay with it, if not that's all right too). It's fun because I can be a courtesy auntie for a short time, the parents have an adult to talk and joke with, and the kids are entertained.
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