Teen Pregnancy

[Andara Bledin]

Once I get my degree and better job, I'm looking into adopting. It may not be a part of me, and that's somewhat depressing, but it still a baby I can raise.

The most important things you can pass on to your child(ren) has nothing to do with genetic material.

But it will be part of you. Not of your blood, but of your heart. and that is so much more important.

Quoted for truth.
----
And thank you, Sheldon. This thread was starting to get too serious.

^-.-^

[Caffienated_Caramel]

I used to think I wanted kids. But becoming pregnant and realizing that I couldn't financially support it which unfortunately made me abort it. It was hardest thing I could have ever done.

Ever since that happened, I've been very unsure if I still want any, adopted or birth.

[Seshat]

Once I get my degree and better job, I'm looking into adopting. It may not be a part of me, and that's somewhat depressing, but it still a baby I can raise.

I have two comments here.

1. My decision not to have children of my own body was fairly simple once I looked at my genes. I wouldn't give these to my worst enemy - why would I give them to my child?

2. An adoptive child of yours, Plaid, will KNOW he or she was wanted.* And the child will become part of you. Your ideas, your beliefs, your love, your history. Your child.



* Yes, I have heard the horrible stories of children who were adopted, their parents then had an unexpected natural child, and the adoptive kid then got treated as lesser. I doubt Plaid would do that.

[XCashier]

Me: I'm 19 ma'am.
SC: GASP! You can't wait much longer, you'll get too old! Why haven't you had any yet?
WTF?

indeed. I was 33 when I had my son, that's hardly too old! I was healthy, he's healthy. One of my best friends had her daughter at 41, and they're both healthy.

Me: I didn't know that waiting until I was more mature and responsible to take care of a baby was bad.

It isn't; it's a very wise thing to do.

[Evil Queen]

For a very brief time I wanted kids. When I dumped my then-boyfriend I changed my mind and didn't want to have any kids.

But when I was 22 I was informed I could NEVER carry to full term unless I went through some surgery and hormone therapy. Lots and LOTS of hormone therapy. A year later, nearly two, I've finally come to terms that, even if I do change my mind and want kids, I will never be able to.

I sometimes get pestered about not having kids yet. I tell the offended the truth; I can't have kids because I'm guaranteed to miscarry, so kiss my ass.

[Magpie]

But when I was 22 I was informed I could NEVER carry to full term unless I went through some surgery and hormone therapy. Lots and LOTS of hormone therapy. A year later, nearly two, I've finally come to terms that, even if I do change my mind and want kids, I will never be able to.

I know how that feels, even if you don't ever plan on having kids (things have changed a lot since I was diagnosed).

[RetailWorkhorse]

I sometimes get pestered about not having kids yet. I tell the offended the truth; I can't have kids because I'm guaranteed to miscarry, so kiss my ass.

*Pats* Which is why when you have kids you'd be wise to get a surrogate to carry for you.

Flea-Bit and I will be adopting. Because MPreg only happens in fanfiction.

[phantasy]

That's insane, mid-late 20s being too old? My husband is 25 and still doesn't want a baby. I'm 19 *ducks from icy glares* and am not able to have a child without some hormone therapy, but I'm not ready yet. Probably in a good 5 or 6 years, I'll be ready then.

Kudos to you for reacting the way you did. I would have been (and acted) highly offended.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I'll never be ready for kids, because at 23, I decided I didn't want them. I'm 28 now, and I still don't. I've never regretted it, and I never will. I'm not mother material.

You're wiser than most people twice your age, never forget that. That poor kid, I hope she'll survive that cretinous harridan of a mother.

Same here. When I was eighteen, people would reply to my assertations that I did not want children with a patronising, "When you're thirty, you'll change your mind. Your biological clock will start clanging and then you'll have a baby." Sorry, thirty now, and still determined not to spawn. I happen to like staying out all night, smoking and drinking, spending my spare cash on me, myself and I and riding a motorbike.

That woman; I feel sorry for her kid. Hopefully she'll rebel against her lazy, stupid mother and go off and do something constructive with her life.

[Lady Legira]

I'll never be ready for kids, because at 23, I decided I didn't want them. I'm 28 now, and I still don't. I've never regretted it, and I never will. I'm not mother material.

You're wiser than most people twice your age, never forget that. That poor kid, I hope she'll survive that cretinous harridan of a mother.

Like you I've never wanted kids (I'm 32) and I've had the surgery to prevent it too. If anyone asks I say I can't have children if they assume it's because of medical reasons I don;t care but if they ask I tell them the truth. I have one Kidney, asthma, a bad knee and a mixed bag of other things so not the best idea for me to have a sprog that might ruin my body. Oh and I actually like having money to go on holidays, sleeping in and not being dependant on a small human.

All that is a long way of saying - You own your body and you know it best, if the time is right you'll have a child but if not then your choice whatever harridans like that tell you.

[Primer]

I'll be 50 in a few weeks, and I'm STILL too young and immature to have a kid!

[Andara Bledin]

When I was eighteen, people would reply to my assertations that I did not want children with a patronising, "When you're thirty, you'll change your mind. Your biological clock will start clanging and then you'll have a baby."

O.M.G! What the hell is up with people like that?

I've known since I was 7 that I didn't want kids. At all. I am not maternal, kids hold absolutely no appeal to me what-so-ever, and I'm selfish. I want my time for me. Heck, I'm barely responsible enough to take care of my car and my cats. I certainly don't have what it takes to take care of another human being. I wouldn't even take care of my ex, and he was (mostly) an adult.

^-.-^

[dalesys]

I was 20 when my first kid was hatched (it's her birthday today!) and my ex-wife's a year younger than I am... but I'd been tending kids all my remembering days (8 younger sibs), so I was pre-repaired.

Also, if a child is adopted as a person, not a toy, they truly become part of your heart. My parents have informally infolded quite a few people as family. I feel them as my semi-sisters and kinda-brothers.

[Lace Neil Singer]

O.M.G! What the hell is up with people like that?

I've known since I was 7 that I didn't want kids. At all. I am not maternal, kids hold absolutely no appeal to me what-so-ever, and I'm selfish. I want my time for me. Heck, I'm barely responsible enough to take care of my car and my cats. I certainly don't have what it takes to take care of another human being. I wouldn't even take care of my ex, and he was (mostly) an adult.

^-.-^

I'm the same; when I was a child, I didn't even play with dolls. I played with toy guns and toy cars mostly. I have never been maternal. Some women, shockingly, are not maternal and I wish more people who say this kind of moronic statement would open their minds and realise this.

[XCashier]

Some women, shockingly, are not maternal and I wish more people who say this kind of moronic statement would open their minds and realise this.

Some folks just cannot think outside their own experience, or cannot comprehend anyone who doesn't fit in a tidy little stereotype box. I agree, it is frustrating.