Evidently, I will never be free...

[Aisling]

I used to get a lot of the "So when are you two finally getting married?" questions. Fiance and I have been together for a decade now, FTR. I finally started telling people the truth: "Well, we started planning a wedding, but my grandparents declared they wouldn't attend since it wouldn't be in their church, and they made my mommy cry. A white dress and cake isn't worth making my mommy cry, so we're waiting until people stop being assholes."

People don't ask me anymore.

[blas]

I really need to buy a notebook and take notes when I do my daily CS gazing.

I wish I could think of this stuff myself.

[MaggieTheCat]

My husband and I have been lucky, apparently. Both of our parents knew before we got married that we are not interested in children. Both of our siblings already have kids, so the parents didn't care since they already have grandchildren. So we, at least, haven't been getting it from them. (I suspect my husband's grandmother will try in on us at some point, but she is well-known for being loud, opinionated, and off her rocker, so nobody listens to her anyway.)

Husband's co-workers also haven't given him much grief, at least that I've heard about. I think a lot of them are like us, though, and understand wanting to wait/not wanting kids at all.

I think we may get some nosiness from the neighborhood, though. We just moved into a house and I swear to god, every other house in the entire neighborhood has kids. I know every house on our block has kids. Let's hope they get the message, if/when they do ask, since I don't want to alienate the whole neighborhood.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Maybe I should say something like "Oh, hey, when was the last time you had your prostate checked? Are you gonna do that soon? Hey when was your last pap smear, how did that go?"

I double-dog DARE YOU to say it.

[BlaqueKatt]

I had hoped that at some point in my life, stupid people would stop trying to discuss what's going on in my uterus with me. In fact, that day will be a happy day, one I look forward to. Probably VAINLY look forward to.

If it makes you feel any better we get it too-I had my tubes tied at 27(I'm 34 now)currently I'm either starting early menopause or looking at a hysterectomy(depends on today's tests)-hubs and I both get asked-I now answer with "well we both have genetic issues that we don't want to pass on, and I'm facing removal of baby storage systems...so how about never?"

Makes them feel nice and awkward.....

[ralerin]

I have links!

This and this and the other thread on Indiebride that I can't find called "Snappy Answers To Stupid Questions" all contain...well...snappy answers to stupid questions.

This will make those of you who don't have children, not want to have children.

[Moggie]

I have one kid and I'm often hassled by my parents and random other people to "give her a sister or brother".
I made my contribution to the gene pool thanks, and I'm trying to conserve some natural resources ( like my sanity).
I've also always maintained you should never have any more kids then you can catch at a dead run and I don't run that fast any more.

[redbluegreenyellow101]

I'm an only child and people ask my mom when she's going to have her next kid.

I'm 21 and my mom is 53, by the way.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Oh, man, this one is so brutal it makes MY face burn: "Just as soon as I can ... stop ... miscarrying them."

I mean. Damn.

But it's pretty much perfect.

Seriously, and I don't even mean it to be funny, either. How do these idiots know it's NOT true? Maybe for the next poor person they ask, it WILL be true!

I'm going to say it. Anyone asks me again, I am going to say it. Although I am going to probably be kind of matter of fact about it, because that suits my personality better. They won't know if I am fucking with them or not, but it will be awkward.

[Sheldonrs]

I just tell them "i don't mind shooting 'em IN the ass, But I'm not raising anything that shoots OUT OF their asses."

[Sunsetsky]

I haven't been asked yet, thank god! I do look young for my age though so I guess that works to my advantage. There are some people who think I'm in my late teens and are surprised to find out that I'm in my mid-twenties.

I'm sure the badgering will begin once I do get married though.

[BeeMused]

Of idiots asking me when I plan to have another kid.

I will be forty seven in a couple months.

I had hoped that at some point in my life, stupid people would stop trying to discuss what's going on in my uterus with me. In fact, that day will be a happy day, one I look forward to. Probably VAINLY look forward to.

Forty Fucking Seven.

In fact, in fucking FACT, brothers and sisters of the congregation, I am having a damn HOT FLASH even as I type this. No shit. It has fucking started.

They wanna know when I'm gonna have another kid. I'm standing there drenched in sweat and they ask me this.

I feel your pain, I am already 47 (1963 is an excellent year to be born in!). I only rarely have hot flashes during the day, but at night, creates havoc with my sleep. *mutter* *mumble* Climacteric is a fact of life and I'm not going to take hormones.

I hate that kind of question! I don't want kids, not when I was younger, not now! Besides, I had my tubes tied when they where poking a laparoscope into my abdominal cavity to remove a cyst from one ovary.

When I was still at school, one of my grandmothers asked: "Why's she going to school, she'll marry and have kids anyway." My Mom simply responded: "She wants to go to school and university, so she's going to..." Yeah and guess who was bragging: "My granddaughter is going to university..." Bah! Even then I didn't want kids.

Some people want them, others don't. It's none of my effing business and none of other people's!

Oy! Who turned on the heating! Tíme to change the t-shirt!

[Red_Dazes]

I've been asked that by a few people, I always smile brightly and tell them in my most pleasant voice "Because I hate the little bastards." or "it was decided that I am not allowed to breed because I would most likely eat my young"

The Beau recommends When are you going to have kids? "When do you need the child sacrifice?"

....Shuts people up really fast.... and makes them slink away cautiously... so it works very well...

[LillFilly]

I second the motion. I swear it's worse when you're younger. I always hear "Oh you'll change your mind!" NO I WON'T!!!

Same gripe about people asking "When are you getting married?" Same people, every day!

[XCashier]

Jeez, you'd think humans were endangered, what with all these fools questioning others' reproductive choices. There are over six billion people on the planet, I don't think the species is going to go extinct if a few people choose not to have babies.