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Geez. I've been typing this for a good hour at this point, between Facebook and the ASCII diagram. I only do it because I love you guys. 
So I'm on the line for the last bus that will take me home. I have a splitting headache, and I'm standing there with my sunglasses on so nobody can see the pure angsty deathwish for all of mankind that I have in my eyes as the headache takes its cruel toll on my sanity. Here are the events that wracked my soul to the brink of posting this that occurred last night.
First of all, here's a neat ASCII color-coded map of the bus stop.
DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDBBBBBBBUS ->
DDDDDDDDoppppppppopppppppSo1xxxxxxxoxxxxxxxx
DDDDDDDDp
D<-BUSESoppppppppoppppppp2oMpppppppoppppppppop--->
________|¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
misc person
1 or 2 are the incidents as they correspond to here.
S = the Suit in #1.
Bus - The direction the bus goes in. The front door aligns with the "U" when it does arrive. Note that the bus wasn't here at all yet.
M - Me.
1) "Yo bro, kill 'dat whitey!"
A tall, though not very large, African American male, likely around 24 years old, I suppose, was standing to the right of the pillar. Generally, when you get into line, point S is the first one to arrive, and the first person onto the bus. Everyone lets that person on first. It's customary.
But occasionally, you'll get someone who stands in position 1. Today, this male was standing there when I got there. This is generally the position to stand in if you want everyone to not let you on the bus at all, since you're cutting the line.
So 1 suddenly starts making a commotion about how S, an older man who looks like Half Life 2's Dr. Wallace breen but in a black suit and tie. 1 was accosting
S that he shouldn't speak to him, and that "whitey is always putting me down," and that "I'll kill every last whitey in this god%@#$ station," and the soon-to-be 2 I was standing next to was just shaking her head. S was just standing there, leaning against the pillar, looking entirely ambivalent to this. I didn't even hear him say anything before the guy started making his commotion. 1 was a complete jerk for the entire duration of the trip, .. not letting anyone sit near him, cutting in front of the entire line and swearing up a storm at anyone who even so much as touched him.
2) "He's LATE! Why the hell is he so LATE?"
Now, I'm not too sure if this is a reasonable thing to be sucky about if a driver is late. In the evenings, there's only between 1 and 3 buses that arrive after 6:00 PM. Generally fewer. This bus I was expecting has been known to arrive between 8:50 and 9:40. It's now 9:15 PM. I'd arrived there at 9:02.
2 is a middle-aged African American lady. Looks nice enough at a glance, but apparently not. She's talking to anyone around her who can hear her.
2: Y'know, it's 9:00! (It's 9:15. ._O' ) He's late! Where is he? We're all waiting! What do you think is taking him so long? (still not talking to anyone.) OH LOOK, NOW HE'S LEAVING!! *Points*
She's pointed to a bus that shares the same number as our bus, but not the same letter. (For example, if our bus was an A8, that bus is a D8.) She misreads it and claims it's our bus as it passes us by. She does the same for the next few buses. There are buses that wait to the left of our bus-stop. They pull in and wait there, having their engines turned off.
Eventually she gets fed up and actually goes over there to inspect the buses and find out why they're just sitting there. She jumps around in front of the bus, waving her hands, and soon walks completely around it, then waits in front of the door.
Eventually she comes back, and sheepishly admits that "It wasn't our bus," but that they should still stop waiting and just come pick us up already.
lol WTF lady? You're a regular comedian.
So she continues to ask why it's so late. I tell her, kinda aside, that there was construction work along the later parts of the route, and that there was recently a fire along the beginning of the busroute. Firetrucks everywhere. So much damage. This kinda quiets her down.
But then the bus actually arrives, and the woman points out "The bus ain't burnt! There was no fire!"
lol are you for real? Why would a bus drive through fire? I like you, lady; you probably went to school in clown college.
3) "The Bulbous Bouffant."
I don't know where the heck this guy came from. The bus has arrived and people are boarding in a rather haphazard manner. The line of people (see the chart above.) has collapsed in on itself and people are just crowding around to get on the bus first. (I so hate when that happens.)
Out of nowhere comes this large round slightly older gentleman wearing a massively expanding suit. He's not so much fat, as he is a very dark basketball with arms and legs and most of a head. He has a completely relaxed and indifferent expression on his face as he cuts through the crowd with surprising speed. His sheer persona bounces people out of the way as he waddles forward. He squashes a young man's arm against the bus and pins it there, completely ignoring the cries of the young man. The young man punches him in the face, but the basketballman does nothing about it and just walks up onto the bus, cutting another person off from the tiny trail to the bus.
When he's actually on the bus, he sits in the seats behind the driver meant for the elderly and disabled, and takes up no fewer than three seats, sitting in the middle of the two. His right arm falls to the side, taking up the fourth seat in the cluster of four side-by-side seats there, and his legs jut out far into the aisle. The effect is of a morbidly obese rag doll. People are tripping over his legs, swearing at him as they get up, and walk on, muttering.
4) "An Eternity of Chatter."
I manage to get a seat next to the exit, but I slide in toward the window, as is the polite thing to do to allow someone else to sit in the aisle seat. Eventually this thin 23-year old'ish girl sits next to me and immediately begins chatting up a storm on her bluetooth or whatever while typing on her iPhone thing. (I am not very "hip" with the current technology, despite being of that generation.)
I still have the splitting headache, and wish doom and gloom upon the world behind my Sunglasses-At-Night attitude and stance while sitting there with my backpack on my lap. She grants me no respite from the hellish pounding of the headache coupled with the chaotic nature of her talking. (Chaos is bad for headaches.) There is no order to anything that she says.
Her speaking gets louder and louder. Eventually she gets into a tiff with the person on the other end and starts SCREAMING BLOODY MURDER at the top of her lungs at whoever it is that is undoubtedly about to shrivel up in fright on the other end of her connection. The people on the bus around us get mighty riled up and protest her loudness. She hollers back in that shrill "I DON'T CARE WHAT U THINK" attitude of hers, and continues with her one-sided conversation.
It came to a point where a gamy-looking kid meanders his way through the crowd, rips off her Bluetooth, says into it "She'll call you back..." and puts a finger to his lips as he leans down at her, shushing her, and hands back the Bluetooth.
I wish that was the end of it. She gets up after putting it back onto her ear, and shoves the gamy kid down to the floor in front of the exit door. The kid manages to kick her in the chest from the floor, and she lands hard on my shoulder. Her iPhone has clattered to the floor seconds ago.
She starts to cry. Gamy kid just walks away.
If there was ever a time when I wanted to growl at someone, that'd be the time.
So I'm on the line for the last bus that will take me home. I have a splitting headache, and I'm standing there with my sunglasses on so nobody can see the pure angsty deathwish for all of mankind that I have in my eyes as the headache takes its cruel toll on my sanity. Here are the events that wracked my soul to the brink of posting this that occurred last night.
First of all, here's a neat ASCII color-coded map of the bus stop.
DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDBBBBBBBUS ->
DDDDDDDDoppppppppopppppppSo1xxxxxxxoxxxxxxxx
DDDDDDDDp
D<-BUSESoppppppppoppppppp2oMpppppppoppppppppop--->
________|¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
misc person
1 or 2 are the incidents as they correspond to here.
S = the Suit in #1.
Bus - The direction the bus goes in. The front door aligns with the "U" when it does arrive. Note that the bus wasn't here at all yet.
M - Me.
------------------------------
1) "Yo bro, kill 'dat whitey!"
A tall, though not very large, African American male, likely around 24 years old, I suppose, was standing to the right of the pillar. Generally, when you get into line, point S is the first one to arrive, and the first person onto the bus. Everyone lets that person on first. It's customary.
But occasionally, you'll get someone who stands in position 1. Today, this male was standing there when I got there. This is generally the position to stand in if you want everyone to not let you on the bus at all, since you're cutting the line.
So 1 suddenly starts making a commotion about how S, an older man who looks like Half Life 2's Dr. Wallace breen but in a black suit and tie. 1 was accosting
S that he shouldn't speak to him, and that "whitey is always putting me down," and that "I'll kill every last whitey in this god%@#$ station," and the soon-to-be 2 I was standing next to was just shaking her head. S was just standing there, leaning against the pillar, looking entirely ambivalent to this. I didn't even hear him say anything before the guy started making his commotion. 1 was a complete jerk for the entire duration of the trip, .. not letting anyone sit near him, cutting in front of the entire line and swearing up a storm at anyone who even so much as touched him.
------------------------------
2) "He's LATE! Why the hell is he so LATE?"
Now, I'm not too sure if this is a reasonable thing to be sucky about if a driver is late. In the evenings, there's only between 1 and 3 buses that arrive after 6:00 PM. Generally fewer. This bus I was expecting has been known to arrive between 8:50 and 9:40. It's now 9:15 PM. I'd arrived there at 9:02.
2 is a middle-aged African American lady. Looks nice enough at a glance, but apparently not. She's talking to anyone around her who can hear her.
2: Y'know, it's 9:00! (It's 9:15. ._O' ) He's late! Where is he? We're all waiting! What do you think is taking him so long? (still not talking to anyone.) OH LOOK, NOW HE'S LEAVING!! *Points*
She's pointed to a bus that shares the same number as our bus, but not the same letter. (For example, if our bus was an A8, that bus is a D8.) She misreads it and claims it's our bus as it passes us by. She does the same for the next few buses. There are buses that wait to the left of our bus-stop. They pull in and wait there, having their engines turned off.
Eventually she gets fed up and actually goes over there to inspect the buses and find out why they're just sitting there. She jumps around in front of the bus, waving her hands, and soon walks completely around it, then waits in front of the door.
Eventually she comes back, and sheepishly admits that "It wasn't our bus," but that they should still stop waiting and just come pick us up already.
lol WTF lady? You're a regular comedian.
So she continues to ask why it's so late. I tell her, kinda aside, that there was construction work along the later parts of the route, and that there was recently a fire along the beginning of the busroute. Firetrucks everywhere. So much damage. This kinda quiets her down.
But then the bus actually arrives, and the woman points out "The bus ain't burnt! There was no fire!"
lol are you for real? Why would a bus drive through fire? I like you, lady; you probably went to school in clown college.
------------------------------
3) "The Bulbous Bouffant."
I don't know where the heck this guy came from. The bus has arrived and people are boarding in a rather haphazard manner. The line of people (see the chart above.) has collapsed in on itself and people are just crowding around to get on the bus first. (I so hate when that happens.)
Out of nowhere comes this large round slightly older gentleman wearing a massively expanding suit. He's not so much fat, as he is a very dark basketball with arms and legs and most of a head. He has a completely relaxed and indifferent expression on his face as he cuts through the crowd with surprising speed. His sheer persona bounces people out of the way as he waddles forward. He squashes a young man's arm against the bus and pins it there, completely ignoring the cries of the young man. The young man punches him in the face, but the basketballman does nothing about it and just walks up onto the bus, cutting another person off from the tiny trail to the bus.
When he's actually on the bus, he sits in the seats behind the driver meant for the elderly and disabled, and takes up no fewer than three seats, sitting in the middle of the two. His right arm falls to the side, taking up the fourth seat in the cluster of four side-by-side seats there, and his legs jut out far into the aisle. The effect is of a morbidly obese rag doll. People are tripping over his legs, swearing at him as they get up, and walk on, muttering.
------------------------------
4) "An Eternity of Chatter."
I manage to get a seat next to the exit, but I slide in toward the window, as is the polite thing to do to allow someone else to sit in the aisle seat. Eventually this thin 23-year old'ish girl sits next to me and immediately begins chatting up a storm on her bluetooth or whatever while typing on her iPhone thing. (I am not very "hip" with the current technology, despite being of that generation.)
I still have the splitting headache, and wish doom and gloom upon the world behind my Sunglasses-At-Night attitude and stance while sitting there with my backpack on my lap. She grants me no respite from the hellish pounding of the headache coupled with the chaotic nature of her talking. (Chaos is bad for headaches.) There is no order to anything that she says.
Her speaking gets louder and louder. Eventually she gets into a tiff with the person on the other end and starts SCREAMING BLOODY MURDER at the top of her lungs at whoever it is that is undoubtedly about to shrivel up in fright on the other end of her connection. The people on the bus around us get mighty riled up and protest her loudness. She hollers back in that shrill "I DON'T CARE WHAT U THINK" attitude of hers, and continues with her one-sided conversation.
It came to a point where a gamy-looking kid meanders his way through the crowd, rips off her Bluetooth, says into it "She'll call you back..." and puts a finger to his lips as he leans down at her, shushing her, and hands back the Bluetooth.
I wish that was the end of it. She gets up after putting it back onto her ear, and shoves the gamy kid down to the floor in front of the exit door. The kid manages to kick her in the chest from the floor, and she lands hard on my shoulder. Her iPhone has clattered to the floor seconds ago.
She starts to cry. Gamy kid just walks away.
If there was ever a time when I wanted to growl at someone, that'd be the time.
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