the wrong thing to say

[PepperElf]

just thinking about a recent college class i took on tech support.... and something the teacher said during our last day of class.

now.. there's a student i've had in a couple of my classes that isn't well liked. I'll call him George.

George isn't well liked because he often likes to try directing classes onto his own side topics. Last fall it happened a lot in one class... this spring it wasn't so bad. And no matter what, he's never been as bad as the walking-rage-bomb from my summer computer class.


The teacher told the class that George has Asperger's and explained that one of the symptoms is the tendency to think you're right (even if you're not). I'm not sure if that's true or not, but she went on to say that many people involved in science have it... except that with engineers it's more like picking out who doesn't have it.


Now I'm a bit mixed on this knowledge. Yes, knowing that George's personality issues are not his fault isn't bad per say... I mean it won't change how I talk to him since I never talked down to him in the first place. (and as I said... I've been in class with people who were more disruptive, and he'd been improving since last fall)

However on the other hand, I shouldn't have gotten that kind of gossip from a teacher about one of her other current students. (no George wasn't in that tech support class, but I think he had her for another class).

Talked to Mom about it and she suggested I say something to the school after I get my grades.

I do like the teacher, cos it's not a bad class... but yeah it feels a bit awkward knowing George's medical information.

Come to think of it... in this college you can get specific accommodations by law for certain medical issues, and the teachers have to be made aware that you have accommodations... would divulging someone's condition - especially if it's something mental in nature - be an HPPA violation?

[Aisling]

Sounds like the teacher overstepped some BIG boundaries. Definitely say something.

[Mystic]

I dunno, it sounds like he was trying to explain the students actions if it happens that a lot of people were complaining about him. I think a lot of it would have to do with the tone he used. Was he condemning or compassionate?

[jnd4rusty]

I agree with Mystic. It sounds more like the staff was just trying to explain the behavior of a student who really can not help himself and who has caused distruptions in her class. If this behavior is disruptive and causes problems for other students then I think that this is appropriate, afterall every student pays for the same learning experience and attention from the staff and if one student was causing constant disruptions which affected my learning then I would be pissed, especially if I thought the teacher was not doing anything to eleviate the situation. I would also be more compassionate if I knew that the student could not help himself due to medical conditions. Anyways that is my two cents worth. I do understand your point also, whose to say that this staff member isn't just a loud mouth who spouts out peoples personal information to everyone, but does she say anything about any other students in her class or classes? Another thing to think about is whether or not this teacher actually had permission from the student or student's parents to explain the situation.

[Misanthropical]

My big guy has Asperger's and yes, one of the symptoms is thinking you're right when you're not. It does drive me crazy sometimes.

I do think the teacher was only trying to explain why George is the way he is and not to try to humiliate him.

[MaggieTheCat]

Still a major HIPPA violation, whether the teacher was being compassionate and understanding, or not. It's up to the OP to decide whether she wants to report it or not, but that teacher should not have divulged personal health information about an individual student without that student's consent (maybe he had already given consent to the teacher?) It would be like explaining that so-and-so has missed the last week of class because they're recovering from an STD or because they're recovering from a round of chemo-therapy.

[Exaspera]

The teacher may have mistakenly thought that it was general knowledge. However, I do believe that she went out of bounds here in telling you.

[PepperElf]

I've had teachers do the other thing tho - the "concerned" thing.

I was feeing bitchy one time last fall and snapped at another student - not George but someone also with a condition. The teacher scolded me and said "leave him alone, he has a medical condition"

Now *that* I consider to be OK.
The teacher for my tech class though was more ... chatty about it than a "leave him alone" tone of voice

[Shalom]

Not all of us Aspies are shy about letting people know about it.

Matter of fact, we (or at least I) can generally tell another Aspie at a distance, and certainly on first interaction with them. One giveaway is that names are irrelevant; I've had very enjoyable conversations with people on subjects in which we were both interested, and only after we parted did it occur to me that neither of us gave the other his name, nor thought to ask the other for theirs.

Yet if he hadn't identified himself as such, the teacher shouldn't have done it. The question remains, did the teacher have certain knowledge of a medical condition, or was it only his assumption based on the student's behaviour?

(As far as believing you're right when you're not, I don't think that's Asperger's, that's just stubbornness. Especially if you have facts to back yourself up with. If you do find out you're mistaken, you will proclaim that fact just as loudly, because facts are important. I once had a disagreement with the other Aspie in my synagogue regarding the date of construction of a certain piece of road infrastructure, and when I got home and looked it up, and found that he was right and I was wrong, I went back to the synagogue and announced that fact to the congregation. Embarrassment is irrelevant, I had made a misstatement in public and needed to correct it.)

Pet peeve: It's HIPAA, not HIPPA. (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) I run into this misspelt acronym on a daily basis in the pharmacy biz, and it just bothers me. Sorry.

[crazylegs]

One giveaway is that names are irrelevant; I've had very enjoyable conversations with people on subjects in which we were both interested, and only after we parted did it occur to me that neither of us gave the other his name, nor thought to ask the other for theirs.

I thought that was "Being English..."?

[Magpie]

except that with engineers it's more like picking out who doesn't have it.

QFT. After being told that one of the hints for my diagnosis was major eye-contact difficulties, I decided to practice. I discovered that almost no one around engineering makes eye contact.

And it is entirely possible that George is very open about his Asperger's, and that the teacher feels it ok to pass it on. Without intending to start the debate here over whether or not it should be considered a medical condition or not, the teacher might also be one of the people who feels that it's just a different way of being, not anything that needs to be treated specially like a learning disability, or ADHD. (Whether or not she's morally right on that, I believe that legally she isn't, so yeah...)

And I don't insist that I'm right all that time! You take that back! There is no WAY that I am convinced that I'm always right. Clearly you must be wrong.

[PepperElf]

The question remains, did the teacher have certain knowledge of a medical condition, or was it only his assumption based on the student's behaviour?

i would say yes. she had him as a student before and may have had him in this current semester.

when you have legal accommodations you bring the paperwork to the teacher and they sign off on it. i don't remember if the condition itself is listed on the paperwork however. (i did it last fall for ADHD but didn't bother doing it this spring)

[Magpie]

My Office for Persons with Disabilities advisor was really pushing to have me write exams through them. (Pro tip: rarely if ever worth it in engineering, especially not if you can get your prof to give the same accommodations on their own). My professor for my course that term was in my research group, and was the prof for whom I was TAing. His reaction at being given the forms was "what do you have? Oh, wait, you don't have to answer that, sorry." I told him anyhow, and was very amused by his response.

[HYHYBT]

The teacher told the class that George has Asperger's and explained that one of the symptoms is the tendency to think you're right (even if you're not).

Stupid question, perhaps, but isn't that true of *everybody* almost by definition? Everyone thinks they're right; otherwise, they'd think something else. Which sounds stupid put that way, but hopefully you can tell what I mean

[Magpie]

Frequently we tend to think more black-and-white. So we're either right or we don't know. The idea of "oh, it's this, but I could be wrong" is slightly more foreign to us. This is why I tend to be so precise with things like "Well, as far as I know it's X" or "I'm fairly sure it's Y, but I could be wrong". To me, if you don't qualify it, you have made an absolute statement. So if I say "Z is the case", you're going to have a really hard time if you know that Z isn't the case.

It's also related to having a harder time seeing things from a different point of view. "You're an idiot if you do ABC". Now, often if someone explains to me (in detail) the circumstances under which doing ABC is sensible, I'll understand. But until then, anyone who does that is just plain wrong. And people frequently don't explain it because a) it's a lot of work for them to explain that sort of thing to me every time, b) sometimes explaining it still doesn't work (people have tried explaining biking on the sidewalk, throwing cans or organics in the garbage, not researching positions, etc, and I still don't get it) and c)when I make a statement like that one I don't leave an impression that explaining why it's sometimes right is good.