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  • My mother is a freak!

    A short little sighting... and I have to post it here because I agreed not to make a scene.

    (Background: I'm known for having a cannon of a temper and a low tolerance for bullshit, which makes for a nasty combination should a spewer of bullshit ever find that cannon aimed at him or her.)

    A few weeks ago, my mother happened to hear me talking about the shop I take my clothes to after I lost a bunch of weight and needed to have all of my good shirts taken in. She asked me about it, because she's in need of a new seamstress. This surprised me because she takes all her clothes to be altered at a local dry cleaner's, and has for years.

    She doesn't want to anymore after what happened.

    What happened?

    Well, a new girl there at that cleaner's pointed out, in the course of measuring some dresses my mother needed altered, that my mother is a freak because one of her legs is longer than the other.

    A freak.

    That bitch called my mother a freak.

    And yes, we know about the discrepancy, thank you. It's what has caused, over the course of my mother's life, that twist in her spine -- the one that has in turn caused nerve damage and which is causing, again in turn, my mother to slowly lose her ability to walk. She might need a brace soon, but we all figure she'll be dead before she's totally chairbound and it can't come a moment too soon. My mother, you see, hasn't had much of a will to live for quite some time now, what with the diabetes making her go blind and all. And then there was that whole thing with her losing the hearing in one ear, which also destroyed her sense of balance as well.

    And you called her a freak.

    Note how my fists are clenching and unclenching.

    But I said I would not make a scene, that I would not call the dry cleaner's and raise holy fucking hell, nor would I appear in person to do the same, and I have not. My mother would just prefer to take her business quietly elsewhere.

    And I am stopping this narrative at this point before I get any more upset. It took me weeks to post this and writing it out has upset me again.
    Drive it like it's a county car.

  • #2
    Well...I'm picturing how I would feel if I were you and all I can think is that your mom need never know what might happen if you were to, oh, find yourself dropping by there on your own time....

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    • #3
      Everyone's limbs are different sizes, there is always one longer than the other just some are more noticeable than others so it would be the assistant who would be a freak if her legs were the same length.
      "My experience has taught me one thing. A shaved cat is much angrier than an unshaved cat."
      Chester Holiday Apartment

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      • #4
        It would be actually very strange if your arms and legs were exactly the same length. No one is perfectly symmetrical. Most people are close enough that its hard to tell the difference, but the aberration in this case is not the person with one leg longer than the other. Instead, its the person with both legs exactly the same length.

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        • #5
          Stopping by when you know the manager would be there is what I would do. Telling the manager about a potential problem-employee would be wise; and besides, it's highly likely that you wouldn't be believed anyway. That dry cleaner woman was pretty outrageous for calling your mother a freak!
          Also, please give your mommy a hug from me. (If she's down for a stranger-hug, that is.) It sounds like she needs them.
          "Is it the lie that keeps you sane? Is this the lie that keeps you sane?What is it?Can it be?Ought it to exist?"
          "...and may it be that I cleave to the ugly truth, rather than the beautiful lie..."

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          • #6
            Not trying to make this less serious than it was and sorry your mother was so upset but oh dear I could see myself as a new and nervous employee maybe trying to make small talk and just blurting out totally the wrong thing in the same way. And I am sure I have done when I was young and nervous never once meaning to actually offend anyone.
            Customer "why did you answer the phone if you can't help me?"

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            • #7
              Or you could, oh, you know, quietly let drop the name of this place and employee to some of your online friends who might, I don't know, feel the urge to quietly contact the manager . . .

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              • #8
                because one of her legs is longer than the other.
                mom had that problem too. and i believe it may have been a similar issue - spine and hips.

                but notice i said "had". a year or two ago, after her knee surgery one of the doctors was examining her legs and he noticed the difference in length. mom told him that it'd been like that as long as she could remember.

                Doctor: Hmm. Try this stretch. Your hips may just be out of alignment. If so, this will fix it.

                He had mom sit in the chair and pull her knee up for maybe 30 seconds seconds on one leg. Then had her switch legs. Then he rechecked her legs. ... For the first time in years they were the same length.

                Mom has to do that stretch daily but... she doesn't mind.


                not sure if that would help your mom or not. it sounds a lot like she's in pain though. i hope she can find a more compassionate - and discrete tailor.

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                • #9
                  Write them an anonymous letter and say exactly what you said here.

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                  • #10
                    Now I'm wondering if that stretch would help me, PepperElf. One of my legs is shorter than the other, and my hips are tilted. It's really obvious. I don't "stand up straight" because my standing up straight is actually tilted to one side. I feel tilted if I'm actually "standing up straight." And I'm not a freak, either, I just have clubfeet and assorted ankle/knee/hip problems that go with it.

                    And I don't know for sure, but I can't imagine "freak" slipping past the lips of someone nervous and trying to make small talk. No. You don't call someone a freak. EVER.

                    I second the making a complaint or talking to the manager. That shouldn't be let go.
                    "And so all the night-tide, I lie down by the side of my darling, my darling, my life and my bride!"
                    "Hallo elskan min/Trui ekki hvad timinn lidur"
                    Amayis is my wifey

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                    • #11
                      My Chiropractor gave me a strech for both arms and legs to fix a almost inch difference I get after a few long weeks of carrying between apointments. It has stopped the crying amount of back pain I'll get the day or two before I get fixed.

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                      • #12
                        My mother has scoliosis, making one leg appear noticeably shorter than the other. She was misdiagnosed as just having her legs two different lengths, but the doctor gave her the correct solution for the wrong problem--she has one shoe built up to compensate. You'd never know something was wrong if you didn't look at her feet and notice that one sole quite a bit than the other. She spent another fifteen years in the Army after that misdiagnosis, able to pass every PT test, when the correct diagnosis would have given her a medical discharge.
                        It's little things that make the difference between 'enjoyable', 'tolerable', and 'gimme a spoon, I'm digging an escape tunnel'.

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                        • #13
                          Quoth LadyAndreca View Post
                          My mother has scoliosis, making one leg appear noticeably shorter than the other.
                          I've got scoliosis, too, but it's slight. My pediatrician noticed early on and kept an eye on it. Never got anywhere near needing surgery, or any treatment really.

                          Just makes one of my hips stick out. Which is why you'll never see me standing with my legs together, especially if I'm wearing a skirt. Nobody notices it, but it's like a neon sign to me.
                          It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

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                          • #14
                            I'd still complain to the dry cleaner, but I'd possibly ask someone else to do it for me if I didn't think I'd keep a level head. It's unfortunate, but getting angry will only put the manager on defensive and will increase the chances of them not believing it.
                            A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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                            • #15
                              yes, haunted; a letter or a chat with the manager/owner is in order. that girl was way out of line by saying that; it was rude, insensitive and highly unprofessional.

                              everyone has a discrepancy in limb/hand/foot length to one degree or another, as alephcat pointed out. it's completely normal and i'm quite sure the girl herself has this discrepancy herself.

                              my apologies to your mother for having to experience such abuse.
                              look! it's ghengis khan!
                              Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them. (so sayeth the irv)

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