Wherein I Almost Break My Pacifism

[WoodenSunshine]

BG: Yesterday was a shittastic day. I got my retainers and when I got home, it looked like it was going to storm something fierce again. Therefore, I needed to get Boyfriend home ASAP (as I am TERRIFIED of driving and just existing near storms.) The thing with boyfriend is that he's a grump when he's first awake...as are most people...</bg>

We decide to stop at D'Awesomeness for really quick foods and I assumed that it wasn't going to storm between then and when I got boyfriend home. I'm feeling incredibly anxious and I'm trying dearly not to have a panic attack.

We decided that we were going to get the same thing since Boyfriend is too tired to really care at this point.

When I got up to the counter, THIS was the conversation with the ...cashier?

WS:
C: Cashier
B: Boyfriend

C: What can I get for you today?
WS: I'll have the Chicken Something or another Cafe Sandwich on wheat.
C: <looks at B> Anything else?
WS: <I look at boyfriend and see that glazed over look on his face> He'll have the same thing.
C: He's a big boy, he can order for himself. <laughs>
WS: <blinkblink> Well, fine then.
B: I'll have the <rattles off the same order>.
C: That'll be $13.78.
<Boyfriend pays because he's awesome!>
C: <tries to hand the change to me>
WS: <counters with eyebrow raise and eye flick towards handsome boyfriend>
C: Well, it's pretty much your money anyways <laughs again>
WS: You know what? He pays and I appreciate it. I thank him for everything that he does for me and I NEVER take him for granted.

Now, this particular cashier has dealt with us many times before and maybe he just thinks that we're on friendly terms or something. However, no one in their right mind would make comments like that to me.

I'm already embarrassed enough that Boyfriend always pays (I was out of work for a few weeks because of surgery and my savings are nil and Boyfriend offered to take care of me until I was on my feet again).

Anyways, I was livid that he thought he had the right to make comments like that AND with a manager so close. I am thinking of making a complaint or just waiting until the next time I go there...

[Zellie Crescent]

If that were me and Bill we both would've said something to the manager, employees have no right to judge anybody unless they're being absolute douchewaffle dicks. And even then they shouldn't say it out loud.

[Akasa]

I'd have asked for a manager.

[WoodenSunshine]

Get this...the manager was RIGHT THERE, because they were all watching the storm (it was crazy ><)

I decided to send a complaint to the company and include my contact information. I don't want any kind of compensation at all, I just need them to be aware of what's going on.

[Little Retail Rabbit]

Err, maybe I've missed something but I don't really see the big deal? Elaboration perhaps, if I have just missed it, but otherwise it looks like a case of "somebody who thinks they are funny but aren't".

Not saying that kinda thing isn't annoying (because it bloody is) but I don't see how its worth making a formal complaint over (unless, as I said, I missed something here).

However, I totally, totally get being wound up over unfunny jokes and people who just laugh at nothing. Its just a personal pet peeve, just annoys me. You know whenever you check a note and the customer always jokes "made it fresh this morning" and expects you to laugh? Well, it wasn't even funny the first time I heard it, and it I had a penny for everytime I had heard it, I would have quit the job long befor then :P

Did have an annoying situation that this reminded me of, a few weeks back. I was buying some birthday cards at a local Card Factory and it transpires that despite being a huge chain, they don't do card transactions under £5 and I had no loose change on me. Inconvenient yes, as I left all my change at home (deliberately) and had only the 2 notes I was intending to use for when I went out for dinner that evening. So I had to break into the note and I was saying to the cashier "I should have bought my change with me. I didn't want to break into this money, I'm supposed to be going out to dinner on that."

She just laughed and said how still I have over £8 change. I said "Well, I like to set aside money for certain things. And I find change burns a hole in my wallet and disappears pretty quickly, so I tend to leave it at home so I don't spend it needlessly on sweets."

More laughter and a condescending comment on how having change means you don't have to use your card. My teeth grit a little.

Me: "Well I don't mind using my card for a small transactions, but only on things I need, so I find it works out well for me."

More laughter. This was really starting to annoy me now as I hadn't said anything funny and it was starting to make me feel a bit...well belittled. I said: "For instance, if I'm on my way to work and I have £1 I'll end up using it to buy a chocolate bar. But I won't do that if I only have my card or a large note." [/matter-of-fact]

She's still bloody laughing! I continue (I almost feel a need to justify myself by this point) "So thats why I'm trying to do more now anyway. It saves me money in the long run and I am also trying to diet...I also had a filling done recently so I'm trying to improve my diet a bit..."

I'd noticed that I seemed to be trying to justify my spending habit of not carrying change needlessly, and I seemed to be having to continue to explain because she found the idea apparently ludicrous, but you know, everyone sympathises when you mention the dentist so surely...nope she carried on laughing *twitch*

Yeah I have slightly unusual spending habits but it works for me. Whatever. It really did annoy me that she was finding everything I said quite amusing...can't say that its grounds for a formal complaint however, although it does mean I will avoid using the shop in future.

(BTW, apologies to OP, not me criticising you, just not seeing the picture apparently).

[Ironclad Alibi]

C: He's a big boy, he can order for himself. <laughs>

C: <tries to hand the change to me>

I see both of the above as big fails for the cashier. They contradicted/denied your order, and didn't return the change to the person who paid. They should be up for retraining or job hunting.

[WoodenSunshine]

Reading online doesn't quite convey the tone that this guy used. It was kind of a "you're an overbearing girlfriend, so I'm going to mock you" tone.

The ONLY reason that I put in a complaint is that I feel that the company should know who they have working for them. AND since there was a manager there who didn't say anything, I felt like going slightly higher would help.

The DM called me and apologized (not what I wanted, really) and also wanted to send me free coupons (which I stated again and again that I didn't want). She told me that she was going to have a talk to him (...yeah, that's what I wanted).

Don't get me wrong, I would go back to that store whether the guy is working there or not. I'm not an SC and I love my Chicken Awesome Sammich, I just want someone to realize that THAT is not customer service. Not to mention, I'm not a big fan of being humiliated.

[Draco]

While the "he's a big boy" thing was annoying... I could easily see the later part being just a normal joke, especially if the cashier has known you two have been together for awhile. Which it sounds like the cashier would figure that out from your frequenting of the place.

Essentially, you ARE going to be viewed as SCs by that cashier and probably much of the staff. You're probably going to end up being "that woman who can't take a joke".

[rose_metal_nz]

First comment about "he's a big boy" I could kindof let slide as a joke, depending on the tone of voice (and it sounds like it wasn't a nice one). Pushy, but OK...

But this?

<Boyfriend pays because he's awesome!>
C: <tries to hand the change to me>
WS: <counters with eyebrow raise and eye flick towards handsome boyfriend>
C: Well, it's pretty much your money anyways <laughs again>

WTH that's not even remotely funny. Not coming on the heels of the last "joke" either. I don't know that I personally would've complained to management, but I certainly would've fumed about it. Very rude, IMO.

[Kisa]

That "he's a big boy" comment sounds like something a mother says about a shy child. NOT appropriate for a stranger to say about your boyfriend. Cashier was making you sound like a control freak > Not cool random cashier...not cool

[Thatgirl71]

I don't think either comments were appropriate, I probably would have told the cashier right there and then, and politely that he was out of line.

[Kogarashi]

I don't think either comments were appropriate

Agreed. He's a good buddy? Fine, he's allowed to crack jokes like that. He only knows you because you come in a lot, but isn't considered a buddy? Attempted "jokes" are just plain rude. Those sound like something only someone really familiar with you and your sense of humor should be making. I'd say a polite complaint to the store is justified.