How to get back at parking space stalkers

[Kiwi]

I think like alot of things in life, its the attitude the cal park stalker gives you.

I can not and will not stand people who think you need to hurry up and get out of "THEIR spot". Until I pull out, it is my spot. I will not race to put my shopping away, I will no hurry and fuss, I will go at my usual pace. If your a nice person and smile and nod at me I might pick up the pace a bit. You play nice, you get nice. You play nasty, youve just challenged the champion of the passive agressive behaviour to a battle of wills.

If you are rude and sit there huffing and puffing tapping your fingers, I will....slow.........way.........the.......hell... ....down. You can beep at me to, I love that! If you beep at me, it means I automatically lose my keys! Or I might sit in my car talking about where we are going next until you give up and I can give a nice, polite, patient human being my parking spot.

[greensinestro]

Lots of opinions on this one. I should also have mentioned an incident a few years back at the local library. The retirees all get first dibs at the new releases, so during the day, it can be a madhouse there. I went on my lunch hour to and the lot was full. Fortunately, I saw this young lady and her son getting into their car, so I waited probably a full minute for them to start backing out. Now, I'm there with my signal flashing, waiting patiently for them to leave, when this old woman in a Lexus pulls in and sees them, too, as she also saw me waiting. She stops and flips her signal on for the same spot! So, what did I do? Nope, I did not give up and decide to park on the curb. I wedged my car between this young lady's car and the Lexus, parking diagonally, then the young lady pulled out. I quickly slammed it into reverse, then grabbed that spot. The old woman's look was one that could probably have melted my face off, she was so mad! I did not care. And, it was not as if this old lady was disabled either.

Call it mean if you want. I call it justice.

[draftermatt]

I refuse to follow people in parking lots. How do you know where they are going?

I'll sit behind a car with my blinker on, but that's it.

[FastFoodFlunky]

Has anybody ever had two drivers fight over your spot?

Just the other day I went to my local WalMart to pick up a few things around noon time, and had enough luck to find the very first spot open next to the handicap spaces with a straight shot to the entrance. I never mind walking but I usually never have much luck . I took the spot and ran in to pick up what I needed.

Well as I was making my way out, I was being tracked like vultures ready to attack their prey. And when people saw the lights flash on my car when I unlocked the doors, there must have been about 4 people floor it to my space and activate their blinkers. After witnessing the chaos, two of the four drivers left to park elsewhere...the other two were DETERMINED to get the #1 spot.

I took a look at both drivers..one was an older woman, i'd say about late 60's, and the other was the typical soccer mom looking woman with her monstrous SUV.

I made it a point to turn my car in such a way when backing out as to block the SUV and make it easier for the elderly lady to capture the spot.

[protege]

I wedged my car between this young lady's car and the Lexus, parking diagonally, then the young lady pulled out. I quickly slammed it into reverse, then grabbed that spot.

I knew a guy who used to do that to people. He wouldn't steal spaces, but if challenged, he wouldn't hesitate to do that. Of course driving a big 1970s Buick helped. I mean, this car was so big, it had its own zip code, and a similarly-sized V8.

[Seshat]

I walk with a cane, and I tend to tire quickly. Someone trying to get me to move faster is way out of luck - and also stressful, which causes me to tire even more quickly and to have to move even more slowly.

Karmic justice, if you will.

I also have a tendancy to park at the far end of parking lots, because I have poor depth perception and (again) am uncomfortable in stressful situations, like trying to manouver a car in a tight space.

So someone following me gets to follow a slow, limping person to a 'bad' space at the far end of the parking lot. And if they then wait too closely for my depth perception, they get to have me stop, get out of the car, limp up to them and ask them to back the hell up so I can get out.

Except they never wait that long. Bye-byee!

[ArenaBoy]

I will lend my space to someone who is polite, nothing more. If an idiot is impolite then it's time for my fun, if I'm not in my car I'll walk around aimlessly till the stalker leaves. If I'm in my car, I will dink around in it, hmm let's see I think I'll check my voicemail, oh yeah what song to start with on the ipod that sort of thing. FastFoodFlunky, that was awesome by the way.

[Becks]

In parking lots: "Honey! We just walked past a space twelve feet closer than the one we parked in. We should go back to the car and move it here so we don't have to walk so far."

I try that one on the man of the household, but only when it's cold out. Or raining.

[zzapp the witch]

I don't think any of us is mean to just be mean in a parking lot, but I do think that we realize that we are in command of our own little piece of the world at that moment, and make the most of it in regards to the polite people of the world.

[Hemily]

I knew a guy who used to do that to people. He wouldn't steal spaces, but if challenged, he wouldn't hesitate to do that. Of course driving a big 1970s Buick helped. I mean, this car was so big, it had its own zip code, and a similarly-sized V8.

this is why i love my buick only mine is a 80's one (1980 to be exact )

[Boozy]

this is why i love my buick only mine is a 80's one (1980 to be exact )

My car's huge too...its got a really long nose, so you really have to watch the front when parking. I love my car, even though my husband makes fun of it. He says that at least he doesn't have to worry about me getting injured in an accident: "An accident in your car would be like a civil war in Africa. Its horrible, buts its happening so far away from you its hard to get emotionally involved."
Personally, I LOVE it when I get stalked for my parking spot. I become drunk and dizzy with power! YOU need something *I* have. You will get what I have WHEN I want you to, IF I want you to. Mwahahahaha!

[greensinestro]

I drive an SUV, similar to those old 70's and 80's model Buicks.....in size and durability, that is.

[myswtghst]

Another b*$@#y thing I do in parking lots?

Lately, for some reason, at my work, people are parking like @$$holes, moreso than usual. I know that there is snow on the ground, but that's even more reason (in my logical mind, at least) to park between the lines so you're not taking up multiple spaces, especially close to the entrance. It's not like the plow guys really leave much of anything on the lots, other than maybe the morning after a huge snowstorm. When I get in at 11, the lot is mostly full, and I have to walk what seems like forever over ice and snow in freezing wind just to get to the building.

As it were, I drive a little red VW, with an excellent turning radius. I also used to be a valet, so I can back a Hummer into a small spot without a problem. What I'll usually do, when I see someone parked a bit over the line, creating a smaller than normal spot that people are too scared to park in, is pull right in. My car's been in 4 accidents and survived, I don't really care about a little cosmetic damage if you feel like whacking my car with your door. It's even funnier when I can park close enough that you can't open the door on the side that YOU were dumb enough to park into my space, for no good reason. Granted, I don't do this to someone forced to park over the line by the person next to them.

(If I'm pretty sure that the person will be a jerk enough to pull something more than dinging the door of my car, I'll write down their license plate #, and the make and model, because all cars on our campus are registered with security, so I wouldn't have trouble reporting someone. I do know people who've had their cars keyed on campus, so I do use some sense.)

The spaces are clearly marked in bright yellow, and they're more than big enough for even your stupid, overlarge SUV. If you can't park it in the space, go park at the back of the lot. At least my brother has the courtesy to park way out if he feels the need to park his baby in more than one spot.

[CSR Kim]

Oh, do I have a story to share...

This happened to me before Christmas, at our local mall (where I worked at the time). I am just c/p'ing from where I posted this elsewhere on the 'net.

Warning: Does contain strong language. Mostly on the part of someone else.






**********************

Yesterday was a first for me. I was called a "fucking fat-ass white bitch" by some crazy woman at the mall. It was awesome. Totally made my day.

What happened?

Well, I had to stop by the mall on my way to work. I was looking for a parking space, and I turn down an aisle outside Max & Erma's restaurant. There is a BMW ahead of me that is slowly inching its way down the aisle, stalking for a space. Walking up behind my car is a lady going back to her car. BMW-lady sees the lady walking back to her car and decides to back up so she can claim this other lady's space for herself. That would be all fine and dandy except for the fact that by this point I am right in front of the spot where the other lady was headed. So, it doesn't appear that BMW lady is going to stop, so I honk at her. She stops. Now there is a small line of vehicles behind me. I can't go anywhere. BMW tries backing up some more, I guess to get me to move, and so I honk again. At this point she opens her door and yells something at me.

I don't move, and other cars behind me start honking. Then this guy from a few cars back walks up to BMW lady's car and asks her to move because she is holding up traffic. I don't know what she said to him, but he threw up his hands and said, "What a fucking bitch" as he walked back to his car.

Finally, about 5 cars down another car pulls out of its space and drives off. BMW lady waits a few more moments and then claims that spot. Now, I did something that I probably shouldn't have done, but as I drove by the BMW, I flipped her off. She made me angry, and I reacted. I normally don't do that. I found a spot for me to park in.

I start walking to the mall and immediately BMW-lady walks over to me and starts yelling. "What's your fucking problem? You knew I wanted that spot! All you had to do was back up!" Me: "I couldn't go anywhere, there were cars behind me. It's JUST a parking space." Her: "Yeah, whatever, you just wanted to be ignorant. You got a fucking attitude." Me: "Whatever." Her: "Whatever? Fucking fat-ass white bitch." Me: "What did you say?"

At this point a lady who was in the SUV right behind me gets out with her 6-year old daughter. She says, "There's no reason to be fighting about a parking space." Me: "I don't want to fight, she's starting it..." SUV lady: "I know it's not you." BMW lady: "All she had to do was fucking back up, but she had to be ignorant about it! Blah blah blah..." SUV lady: "She couldn't go anywhere because I was right behind her!"

Then SUV lady says that all she wanted to do was park, because her daughter had to pee really bad, and it wasn't right of BMW lady to hold up traffic like that. All the while we are walking to the mall, and BMW lady is cussing and going on, and being an overall bitch. All of this in front of a SIX YEAR OLD. We get to the entrance of the mall, and I don't remember what SUV lady said, but BMW lady calls her a "fucking cunt" right in front of the little girl, who immediately gets upset. I think I said something about how she should have some respect and grow up, and then I walked off.

Needless to say I was a bit upset. I called Scott almost in tears and he said I should report the incident to security. So I went and got security, and re-told my tale. But they said unless I had a description of the lady, there wasn't much I could do. I was so flustered at the time, it didnt occur to me to notice what she was wearing. I did show them her car, which was still there. But security guy said all I could do is report it to St. Peters police, but even then they might not have done anything. So I just let it go.

I was so upset, and because I took the time to report it to security, I was 45 minutes late to work.

I cannot believe how psycho some people get around this time of the year. It's a fucking parking space! And it's not like it was horrible weather yesterday either. It was 60-something degrees, and just gorgeous outside. BMW-lady could have walked the extra 25 feet no problem. Something ugly must've just crawled up her ass.

[protege]

Something ugly must've just crawled up her ass.

*Many* BMW owners are like that. They *all* think that the world revolves around them, and that anyone not owning a BMW is scum. Because of that, it's no wonder why people think BMW owners are assholes. I can think of one reason why...they're still pissy because a certain car magazine said that the Mazda Protege has "BMW verve for half the price"

Just last week, I got to see a BMW owner make an ass out of himself. I'm waiting to get on the parkway. There's a line of traffic ahead of me. Because of snow, and an accident further down, traffic is stopped. On this particular ramp, it goes from 2 lanes to one. I'm in the left lane; ahead of me is a city bus. Next to me in the right lane, is some idiot in a black BMW 3-series. Traffic starts to move. Bus starts up, I release the brakes and start moving. No sooner do I take my foot off the brake, the BMW starts revving his engine. That's when it happened--after about the 6th revving, he stalled it I nearly rear-ended the bus I was laughing so hard! I mean, I like the sound of a straight-six (or V8, or whatever), but I also like to see some rich asshole get pwned! That totally made my morning!

...then there was the accident that night. A very large box truck had slowed, and was trying to turn into a parking lot. He was having trouble because of the snow and ice, and didn't want to hit a pole. As he's turning into the lot, some idiot in a BMW (what is it about those cars?) rear-ended him Hard. Truck had maybe a broken light and some paint damage--the entire front end of the car was messed up. Too bad, since it was a new car. So new, it still had the temporary tags on it!